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My baby is not taking feeds

(102 Posts)
Summerlover Fri 26-Apr-13 15:18:21

Hi to all lovely Mums,

I am very new to mumsnet and in disparate need of help.

To start with I wanted to exclusively breast feed my chicken but he had jaundice when he was 10 days old and was in hospital for a night. There in the hospital the doctors put him on Aptamil and when he was discharged adviced us to do mixed feeding. Then he was diagnosed with severe reflux which he has until now. Can breast milk cause reflux?

My LO took just 270 mls yesterday and until now just 120 mls after loads of struggle. He is 4 months old I am really worried and stressed what shall I do?

Please help.

StateofConfusion Sun 28-Apr-13 20:44:05

hello and welcome to mumsnet.

i know nothing about reflux but just wanted to reassure you that my own 4month old doesn't sleep through most nights its 2hourly waking for feeds. She also has days where i carry her constantly as she's whining a wrap sling is a life saver. She sleeps on me alot too or the carseat or puschair slightly sat up she has no issues but will not sleep laid flat!

your doing a great job La leche league are good for advice also the kellymom website re the bfing xx

noblegiraffe Sun 28-Apr-13 21:17:00

Oh I'm pleased you got baby checked out and he was ok. I was a bit worried for you so I'm glad you updated.

Re the feeding, as it's still a problem it would be worth trying to get someone to watch a breastfeed to see if they can spot any problems. So maybe go to a breastfeeding cafe or try to arrange for a visit by a breastfeeding counsellor. With the bottle feeding (I know nothing about bottle feeding I'm afraid) would a different type of bottle help? Or a bigger teat? I've read on here that babies can get frustrated if the hole is too small and they have to work too hard for the milk.

I would also go to baby clinic and get the baby weighed and his weight recorded regularly so if it does drop through the lines you've got a record of this. Can you arrange another appointment with the paediatrician to discuss his reflux because you seem very confused about the best approach with the breastfeeding and medication and whether baby has reflux? If it's possible it's the medication causing the feeding problems, (what is he on?) then they might be able to change it for something else. If the medication hasn't helped with sleeping or being able to lie baby down, then changing medication might help there too.

For you, you really need to get some sleep yourself, you're going to get ill or crack up if it carries on (my DS was a dreadful sleeper and I nearly had a breakdown at 4 months and DH then took over a lot which really helped). It won't hurt your baby if your partner takes him out of the house for a couple of hours while you rest. If he stays in the house, you won't be able to relax listening for him.
Trying cosleeping is a good suggestion too, can you take all the pillows and duvet off your bed, put a bed guard on (look up proper safe co-sleeping guidelines) and doze next to your baby? You could try to feed lying down?

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 29-Apr-13 10:34:35

Also glad you got him checked and he isn't dehydrated. My DS just wanted to be with me and didnt want Daddy but there were times when I knew he had been fed and I just needed to sleep so DH would take him out in the car. He would cry while being out in the car but would be asleep before they got out of the street. You really need someone to take him from you once you've bf him and give him his top up and take him out of the house.

Have you got any bfing groups in your area? Think getting a BFC to watch you do a whole feed is a good idea, she could also check for tongue tie.

Have you or DH managed to find out where your local baby weighing clinic is yet? Think it is also a good idea to get another appointment with the Paeds, have you got an appointment coming up?

We found too that co sleeping really helped. There is some info on sharing your bed with your baby here and how to do it here

Somebody mentioned that the La Leche league might be able to help, there helpline number is 0845 120 2918 and you can find out if there is a group in your area here. If they aren't active in your area don't panic though, there should be other bfing support groups near to you.

Just wish you were near to me so I could come around and help you smile

Summerlover Mon 29-Apr-13 14:54:15

Thank you all ever so much. JJJ that means a lot to me for what you said. Thank you everyone for taking your time out. I have an appointment with new GP tomorrow will ask him to refer us to paeds though the last one never did will try again. I will sit and look up all the links in detail as soon as I get time. I will need to speak to Le leche as well but my munchkin sleeps on me so, don't know when but I have to do all this.

As we have just recently moved so, I don't know any neighbours yet and him not letting me do anything seems its far out of question that I will know anyone smile. He doesn't even like to sit in his buggy that I can atleast take him to 5 mins walk away GP. It's just all so much stressful. But thank you everyone for being there for me. You all make me feel like a part of a big family. Group hug.

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 29-Apr-13 15:05:34

Could you phone the helpline while he is bleeding or sleeping on you? Have you mastered the Internet and feeding at the same time yet?

Summerlover Mon 29-Apr-13 17:34:12

JJJ I am afraid he wakes up so, can't be on phone.

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 29-Apr-13 20:01:30

Feeding not bleeding sorry. Bloody iphone.

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 29-Apr-13 20:03:15

Could you ask DH to take him out for an hour then? My DS was very much like yours but he would settle for a bit in a motorised swing, dd preferred to be in a sling. Both should give you a break, especially if DH is wearing the sling smile

noblegiraffe Mon 29-Apr-13 20:29:47

If you haven't got a sling you should really give one a go. My DD (3 months) was being an unputdownable pain today so I put her in a baby bjorn and was able to hang out washing and eat my lunch without complaint. She also slept in it through a meeting with my bank manager!

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 29-Apr-13 21:50:51

How have the feeds been today?

Summerlover Tue 30-Apr-13 12:09:38

Struggle to feed him but still better. I put him to sleep and then feed him and then took him again for his nap sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn't but still feeling a bit better as I trying to figure out ways to feed him. Good Noble you brought up about the sling. Which sling would you ladies suggest. I am looking to travel abroad as well soon? Don't want to invest too much money in it either as we have already been spending like crazy for the baby. I am sure everyone does it though. As I am not planning to have another baby so, nothing will be of use. Thank you though ladies for bring there.

Summerlover Tue 30-Apr-13 12:20:16

Was about to go to the feeding canpaigntoday but the baby won't let me. He started screaming wont getting his buggy so, still at home literally pleaded him but he won't just let us both go.may be he will let me go to baby clinic today to get him weighed.

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 30-Apr-13 13:06:06

I know its hard but you need to get to that bfing group, you need help. Is it too late to go? Is the baby clinic today too? If you put him in his pram, how far is the walk?

As for slings, I used the close, you can get them on ebay if you are worried about the cost. Some other mnetters might be able to recommend others.

I'd didn't really spend much on the DC, but then we haven't got much grin. I'm just bought things as and when we needed them, but I never regretted spending the money I did on my sling and I sold it on.

Some children's centres have them to loan out or there are slingmeets.

To be honest though I'd just get a sling that is easy to put on and get it quickly.

If you are having trouble phoning the bfing helplines and getting out, could DH have some time off work or could he take him out for a walk or drive this evening so that you can make that call?

Summerlover Tue 30-Apr-13 13:48:46

You are right I need to go to bfing group. It was from 10 to 12 today and I was out of the door by 11:20ish but then it was 25 mind bus ride would have been useless to go by then. I have called up the health visitor she says there is one tomorrow afternoon will try to go for that now. Do you know where I can post on mumsnet and get to know which sling to buy? Thank you as always.

If you don't mind me asking how many kids do you have?

Black lining has arrived hopefully that would help him nap ansmd sleep better.

JiltedJohnsJulie Tue 30-Apr-13 14:15:40

I've got 2. From a large family so have lots of experience and still found coping with DS just so hard. Dd wasn't tongue tied, fed for 10 minutes every 3 hours and slept in her sling in between. It was such a relief.

As for posting on Mn, I'd post in chat, you'll get plenty of traffic there smile

Are there any other bfing groups to go to? Is there a la Leche league near to you?

Summerlover Wed 01-May-13 00:21:02

You do seem very well experienced, thank you for sharing your expertise.

Went to the GP today they didn't even have the weighing balance! Told the GP everything he didn't even look at LO what to say of. Anything and goes some babies are difficult to feed.

He mentioned one of the medication has side effect and when I asked what side effects he said no there isn't,' nightmare!

I asked him to refer to paeds he refused. He said he won't until LO is 6 months and will reexamine then and see if there is any need.

Summerlover Wed 01-May-13 02:21:27

JJJ I am fine bfing right side very comfortable but when it comes to left as just can't do that. Have been latching him mostly to right now. Any suggestions please.

ExBrightonBell Wed 01-May-13 08:40:10

Summerflower, have you found the details of your local health visitor team? They should have a weekly weigh in you can attend, normally without having to make an appointment. I would also hope that the health visitors would be a bit more sympathetic to you than the GP.

Please do also find out about whether there are any local La Leche League meetings - it sounds like you need some experienced breastfeeders to talk to you in real life.

noblegiraffe Wed 01-May-13 08:55:55

I'm really sorry you're struggling to find real life support in what sounds like a very difficult time. If the GP isn't interested then it's even more important to get your baby weighed regularly. If the feeding is really awful then baby will drop centiles and the GP will have to start taking you seriously.

What medication are you giving him? Perhaps someone on here can give you some advice.

If you are really struggling to get out of the house can you ask the health visitor for a home visit? Explain how difficult you are finding things. They could bring scales too.

Why can't baby latch onto the left side? You really need someone to watch you feed! When is the next breastfeeding cafe session?

Accentuatethepositive Wed 01-May-13 11:59:40

Hi summer sorry to hear you are still struggling. Forgive me if I'm wrong but am I right in thinking English isnt your first language? If so then it's even more important you find someone to help you who won't be rushed and will have time to spend with you understanding what problems you are having and making sure you understand the advice you are given. Sadly GPs just don't have the time to spend with patients. If this doesn't apply then obviously ignore me.

A health visitor home visit sounds good. Or if you can afford it perhaps you could get a private lactation consultant to come Ito your home? I had a visit from one which was invaluable. It cost me £80 but worth every penny. Obviously investigate free support first though. If you phone gp they should be able to tell you where and when baby clinic is but I would also ask to speak to the health visitor team and see if they will visit you.

Accentuatethepositive Wed 01-May-13 12:46:38

Also if you want to pm me with your location i would be happy to do some research and try and find some local support for you if you are struggling to get time to look? Or if you are comfortable sharing where you are in this thread MNers near you may be able to help?

Summerlover Wed 01-May-13 14:30:54

I have been trying to get hold of our new health visitor but haven't been able to speak yet. Accentuate English is my first language but having no sleep for 4 months almost I am missing on words which I am sure everyone would understand. I am in south East London. Eltham.

Accentuatethepositive Wed 01-May-13 15:29:33

Hi summer have p m'd you.

Summerlover Wed 01-May-13 18:31:51

Hi Noble,

He is on omeprazole ( not sure if I have spelt it right) and domperidom.

Hi Exbrighton,

Will see about le leche group. Accentuate has given me some very useful info. I think I will ask my DH to take a day off so I can get this sorted. Thank you everyone for your help.

JiltedJohnsJulie Wed 01-May-13 18:53:13

Still think with his behaviour, latch on one side and reflux it could be tongue tie summer.

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