It's been 4 days and I want to quit...

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

DS was born on Saturday (DC2). I had bfing issues with DD (now 2.5) due to her being small, and an undiagnosed TT. Managed to feed her for 7 months.

DS is almost as small and doesn't seem to open his mouth wide enough. He is definitely getting what he needs from the state of his nappies, but the latch is very painful and he seems to do 10 minutes on, fall asleep, and then be rooting again 5 minutes later.

I want to do what's best for him - I suffered with PND with DD and a large part of it was due to bfing issues. Am determined not to feel like that again, and don't know what to do for the best.

My boobs are enormous - currently HH now that my milk has come in, and my areolas are huge. Am painfully engorged which is not helping DS's latch.

Basically, if I want to stop, what's the best way without getting mastitis and more painful engorgement?

Sorry this is long. Very tired - no sleep!

[LadyCurd]

Oh darling you must be exhausted. Has LO been checked for tongue tie? Both of mine had it. Google the Flipple. It's a technique for latching that helps get a big deep latch. It saved my breastfeeding in early days. Remember day3/4 is hormonal hell- early days are so tough. Hope you can get RL support.

[Gingersnap88]

Congratulations

I'm so sorry that you're experiencing lots of pain, it's draining isn't it.

Have you contacted your local breastfeeding support team? I'm sure a breastfeeding counsellor or peer supporter could help you get a more comfortable latch if you'd like to continue breastfeeding.

I was in agony for weeks with DD until I got some help. She's a year now and we are still going strong, I really love it.

Have you tried biological nurturing? Head to bed with your lovely baby, topless, lay back with baby on top (skin to skin) and let baby lead the way with the feeding. Lots of info on it on google / YouTube.

I'm not sure on the engorgement front, other than cabbage leaves and express a little so help the discomfort.

Hope it gets easier for you

[ICompletelyKnowAboutGuineaPigs]

Sorry you're experiencing difficulties and discomforts. I struggled at first with BFing DC2 and it was hard to keep going but I'm so glad I did because we BF for 2 years and it was a wonderful experience.

Just wanted to add that it might be worth taking baby to a chiropractor. My DD had an extremely tight jaw which meant that she didn't open her mouth wide enough to get a deep latch and I ended up getting really sore.

There has been quite a lot of research done on the positive impact on chiropractic, though more needs to be done. I'm on my phone so can't link I'm afraid but I'm sure Google could help if you wanted more info. Good luck x

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Thanks for the replies all. I am definitely in hormonal hell!

Seeing an Infant Feeding Specialist today to look at possible posterior TT and hoping she might help with the latch. Not heard of chiropractor help with bfing... Will Google! Thanks.

Just really wanted this to be a more positive experience than with DD, but all I can think about is how much easier it would be if I bottle fed...

[Shybairns]

My DC2 didn't open her mouth wide enough for the first 8-9 weeks. It was excruciating. Especially in the evening when she clusterfed. After the first 8-9 weeks however she did correct her latch and fed with no bother till she was 10mths.

Try not to panic about the PND. You know you need extra support this time around and so do your family. It would be a shame to put all the blame on the bf when your sleep deprivation and hormones are likely themain issue.
Rather than jacking in the bf at this early stage, how about thinking about all the measures you can put in place to make your life easier. Can someone help you with meals, cleaning, clothes washing, watching your DC1?

I respect the fact that right at this moment you want to run for the hills where the bf is concerned. But with all the other things going on with your body right now I am concerned that this is not a rational decision. If I am wrong, then ask your HV or midwife for help on stopping bf and get in the formula and bottles, and steriliser. I think its important to keep a fairly tight bra on and take some nurofen. Your milk will take a while to dry up completely but I believe the worst pain will pass in a few days. Don't quote me on that though as I am not medically trained and have not experienced this myself.

Good luck.

[ICompletelyKnowAboutGuineaPigs]

Found this thread OP and thought it might give a bit more info.

[crikeybadger]

Great that you're getting to see the IFC SayCool- as you probably now, tongue tie is hereditary so if your LO has it too, then you can make arrangements to get it snipped if it's impacting on your feeding.

As others have mentioned cranial osteopathy can help but you would need to check that the practitioner has specialised in babies.

Regarding the engorgement- try some warmth- either a shower and massage the breasts just to release some milk or try some warm flannels placed over the breasts. If you can't get your baby on to the breast then you may need to hand express just to ensure you don't end up with blocked ducts.

One more thing to try (may sound mad but it can work) is to open your mouth really wide and say "open" when you are trying to latch DS on. Often they will copy.

Hope you get some good help today and things start to improve for you.

[PurplePidjin]

SC, think of the ducks!

Bf is painful for the first couple of weeks. Don't forget you're still healing, and now your nips are being sucked virtually 24/7. You're not a bad mum for bottles, but once you get going bf is easier as your amazing 7 months with dd arrest.

Spend your days on the sofa with remote, drink and food in easy reach. Skin to skin as much as possible, have you got a nice cosy stretchy sling to pop baby in so you can play with dd?

Go to your local bf group - mine is at the children's centre - they'll have toys for dd and just knowing other mums had struggled helped me. Fresh air and the achievement of getting out the house will help fight PND if you think you're prone

[JiltedJohnsJulie]

Congratulations

So glad you've seen your local infant feeding specialist, are they getting the tt snipped? Are you seeing her again?

If you want to stop and are worried about engorgement talk to your mw. If one isn't due to come, have you got a number to contact them on?

[SayCoolNowSayWhip]

Thanks all - really great support and helpful comments, thank you.

Saw the IFS and she was wonderful. DS definitely has a posterior tongue tie! Couldn't do it then and there - the waiting list for the snip is June ! So have made a couple of calls to private TT snippers in the area (unofficially recommended by the IFS) and hopefully will get that sorted in the next few days.

Feeling much more positive after chocolate after seeing her. She suggested expressing after he has 'finished' a feed to completely empty the breast so that my supply is encouraged to make the good fatty stuff that he's not getting a chance to get. As long as I don't over-express or double pump, it shouldn't make too much of an oversupply. And once the TT is sorted, DS should be able to regulate it better himself.

Thanks again all - one of those times when MN is just fab.

And Purple - don't forget the corkscrews....

[PurplePidjin]

:o

[crikeybadger]

Great news.