We don't drink or cook with milk either (literally the odd cup of tea) but as I'm breastfeeding still (dd 19 months) I've never thought to concentrate on calcium intake; just a balanced diet overall.
My weekly shop include one pint of whole milk, and that does her cereal for the week. She too was a bottle refuser, straight from the source was only good enough she's better now as I actually gave her a little beaker of milk the other day and she had a couple of gulps. Still left most of it
She loves her cheese and triangle cheese sandwiches, so assume she gets enough <shrugs>
is that so even after the first year? My DS only had the odd bottle of formula here and there (before he refused the bottle around 6 months) as my DH is intolerant and we just don't have anything in the house = we don't cook with milk, cream ....