How do I feed with a toddler around?(8 Posts)
First day at home with 2 week old ds and 21mo dd. We'd been doing ok at establishing feeding while dd's been at nursery but its all gone completely to pot. Ds has only fed for about 5 mins at a time, obviously isn't satisfied as he won't go down to sleep but I can't work out how I'm supposed to feed him and still keep dd happy.
This is not filling me with confidence for 8 months of maternity leave...
I'm afraid CBeebies has got us through a lot of difficult times in the last 17 weeks since my DS was born. DS1 will sit for a while and watch TV while I feed. I then put DS2 in the sling for sleep and try to make it up to DS1 with some kind of activity like going for a walk or doing some colouring etc. It's not been easy, but it is slowly getting better .
I can also read stories to DS1 while feeding, which he likes. I also try to occupy him by chatting to him lots about what he was like when he was a baby, and how his brother needs his milk etc. But DS1 is slightly older at 33 months.
You'll get the hang of it - before too long you'll be feeding while doing a million other things. It does get easier.
I blame breaking off feeding regularly for part of DD2s inability to settle in the early days as DD1 needed feeding/toilet/attention etc you feel horribly guilty as feeding for the first 6wks seems constant but it does get better and no long lasting sibling rivalry effects I promise! DD2 is now 5mnth and DD1 just 3 adores her.
I kept a music player near me and played different action nursery rhymes eg ring a roses she could "perform" to lots of praise with her dollys. Colouring set on a table nearby, books, jigsaws, anything really that you can be verbally not physically involved in. Cbeebies also played a part as did games/photos on the iPhone. There are simple ones suitable for younger toddlers.
Also when all else fails we had a play place near us that's lots of toddler toys (so not a huge soft play) I took her there and set her free while I sat and bf. the cafe was lovely bringing me cake and water! Can you look for somewhere like that near you?
Thanks, I am panicking! I have been so chuffed with myself that I was breast feeding at all and am now panicking that I'm not going to manage to do it and poor ds will waste away... Vinny did your ds spend most of the day in your sling then?
Thanks for the replies
DS2 spends almost all his time in the sling when not feeding. I do take him out to put him in his chair when I need to cook / wash etc though.
He is only 18 days but is getting to the point where he's not so sleepy any more, and the sling is fab for both getting him off and helping him stay off. I think that not settling isn't necessarily anything to dp with feeding.
We had a month or so with DS1 when he'd only sleep in the sling - but we didn't get one till he was 9 weeks old, and before that I'd spend 6-10 hours a day just trying to get him to sleep. So I'm very grateful that I have one this time.
I'm lucky that DS1 loves books too, and DS2 is a fast feeder. DS1 is older, though, at 2.10.
Send someone out to pound land! I had lots of little 'things' such as stickers, bouncy balls, new books, cars etc. I kept them in a little bag next to my feeding chair and would whip something out for 2 yr old ds. Very quickly he picked up on my need to feed the baby and once ds2 was finished I would make a big fuss of ds1.
TV and Disney movies were a godsend. My ds2 used to feed for an hour for the first 10 weeks or so and ds1 is spirited to say the least but we managed. I found lots of snacks while out and about and strapped in the buggy so I could feed without having to run around. Very quickly ds2 learnt to feed through it all and I even managed to put ds1 on the toilet whilst feeding!
Oh and I had a sling (close parent) one and found it so so useful!
DD was 18 months when DS was born...he's now 4 months....so I fed (still do!) the baby while dd has her breakfast lunch and dinner that also means that during bathtime and bed that the baby is happy and I manage to read a story and feed him again while keeping the other one happy.
It also meant that the baby went to bed quite naturally at 7pm with the other one...they have just fallen into the same routine. I've been EBF but I think fell into more of a routine than I did the first time because as long as baby is fed they can fit around the older one.
As it was the summer although a rubbish one I spent a lot of time outside and in the company of friends with just one baby..gives you a chance to take care of the baby which will need a feed as soon as the other one wants to go on a swing.. while the other one is amused and friends in fact everyone lends a hand.
I think a bouncy chair is a life saver and frankly if they are both needing you then you make a choice which one to deal with first..mainly the older one because the baby needs a)feeding b)sleep c) cuddle d) wind and is so easy to deal with.
And yes cbeebies is also a bit of a lifesaver...I always watch with the 18 mo old while feeding the baby so she gets to see him being fed. They soon get used to it and being so young they cant remember life before the baby.
You can do it! It seems tricky at first but involve the older one if you can and she will soon be helping out and cuddling her little brother.
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