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Infant feeding

Stopping BFing a toddler? - advice on how

13 replies

OPeaches · 24/10/2012 19:31

Ive been away with work for 3 days. DH has put 19month old DD to bed and resettled her in the night ect. I'm home now and she's not asked to be fed. Part of me is very sad that this could be the end, but another part of me has wanted to stop for a while now.

If this is the end of breast feeding, should I express a bit for comfort (have done this while I've been away, just 1-2oz twice a day), or just try to not express? Will I get mastitis? I've never had mastitis before, not sure what to be looking out for. My boobs are currently full and a bit achey but not rick hard or leaking.

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OPeaches · 24/10/2012 19:32

Etc, not ect

Rock, not rick

[smilie]

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hoosyermama · 25/10/2012 14:59

OPeaches I have no advice on how to stop I'm afraid but I relate as my son is this age and still quite devoted to the breast. The 3 days away sounds like the ideal way to deal with this and it's what I'll consider myself once I can get him into his own room (long story but it looks like it will be in place in January). This has worked for both of us and whilst I stopped with my daughter at 12 months I accept they are all different! What I struggle with is others difficulty with accepting this as perfectly normal. I have just come off the phone from my sister who declared it was "weird" & makes others "feel awkward" (I no longer bf in day or in public but he does tend to reach down my top from time to time). It makes me so upset and angry that others feel the need to pass judgment on such a matter. Anyway, I suppose I felt the need to find others who are extended bf'ing too. Sorry to hijack your thread. In answer to your query, I understand the sadness and really, follow your heart, whatever feels right to you but I do think you have done a wonderful job of stopping and if she no longer asks for it, it would seem like a very natural time to stop it. Good luck with it all.

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Gwlondon · 25/10/2012 22:48

OPeaches how is it going?

My supply is going down so I might be closer to the end. I am a bit sad too. DS is 18 months.

I am not ready with things to replace breastfeeding with!

Look out for lumps first. Mastitis is when milk doesn't flow and you get an infection.

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duchesse · 25/10/2012 22:58

I told mine it was "all gone". Supply was usually dwindling by then anyway and they found it easier to get milk out of a cup. Failing that, simply never going back to breastfeeding after a trip away is a very good option.

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SingingSands · 25/10/2012 23:10

Hi, I stopped bf when DS was 2yrs 6mths, because I was going away for a weekend and knew it was the right time. He only had a bedtime feed by that point so I just told him it was "all finished" and gave a sippy cup instead before we went up to bed so his tummy felt full. He did ask for a few nights, but was easily distracted at that age by tickling! It was the right time to stop, although my mum thinks I stopped when he was 10mths!

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Startailoforangeandgold · 25/10/2012 23:25

Do you want to stop, 3 day breaks are fine with toddlers.

DD had a sixth sense for how any days she could leave without feeding. 3 was common. Nearer a week, sometimes, once she was at school.
She said she'd give up, but decided weekends and holidays didn't count.

Holding a DF newborn was quite uncomfortable almost a year after she stopped. Weird because cuddling her has no effect.

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OPeaches · 28/10/2012 20:02

Well . . . we haven't stopped. We're definitely winding down though. She's not asking regularly and DH us putting her to bed. It's probably about once a day or less she's asking. It's the beginning of the end I think, but I'm quite happy about it.

I know what you mean about other people being odd about it. My Nephew is the same age as DD, and SIL us forever commenting "have you not managed to stop yet" and being faux-sympathetic about it. Um, no, im not trying to!?! WTF is that about?

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PessimisticMissPiggy · 28/10/2012 20:12

No suggestions I'm afraid, just sympathy with the family comments. My Dd(17mo) still loves bf morning and might and when she can get away with asking for it and I'm happy to oblige!

My family think I'm keeping her as a baby but she will still be a baby, Bf or not! MIL finds it weird, but has learnt not to comment. She only fed for a couple of weeks out of choice so it is so far removed from what she knows/has experienced.

When we stop I'm hoping that don't offer, don't refuse is the way we'll go but there is no sign so far! Good luck.

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Welovecouscous · 28/10/2012 20:16

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OPeaches · 28/10/2012 20:24

welovecouscous that was my plan too, but then read that children self-wean anytime between the ages of two and seven! Seven!

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Welovecouscous · 28/10/2012 20:46

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MoelFammau · 29/10/2012 23:52

I'm getting to the point of wanting to stop now. DD is nearly 18mo and a boob monster. Every time I try to give up, it coincides with new teeth or (as in last week) a horrible tummy bug that meant BM was the only food she could keep down. I'm scuppered every time!

But I've worked since DD was 3 months old and it's knackering. DD is my first and only baby and I reckon I've done okay to get her to 18mo, especially in the face of family resistance. BUT HOW DO I STOP???

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OPeaches · 31/10/2012 20:21

Aaaargh! We are so not winding down - total wishful thinking on my part. DD is in a bed now so can get out whenever she wants. This week she's been coming through to my bed in the middle of the night asking for feeds, sometimes twice or three times a night.

Aaaaaaaaaargh! I've had enough of the broken sleep. I want this to stop. No idea how to do it without tears, anguish, and even less sleep.

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