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Feel sad that I might ave to stop expressing but I've had enough now

(17 Posts)
pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 18:09:40

After a rocky start to bf I found myself expressing and giving formula top ups, 9 months on I am still doing it. I hope to make 10 months, and then stop. Just feel a little sad but hey ho

r3dsquirrel Sun 14-Oct-12 18:18:14

You've done amazingly well to get as far as you have. 9 months is fantastic. Most people give up if breastfeeding dosnt work out and only a small percentage of those who breastfeed make it beyond 6 months. I've been expressing for 7 months and I'm planning to switch to formula soon. I understand how you're feeling but trust me. You've gone above and beyond.

pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 18:22:40

Thanks red so have you too smile. I wanted to make it to 12 months but it's very time consuming and now ds is on the go even harder

TheProvincialLady Sun 14-Oct-12 18:24:01

You have done very very well and you have nothing to feel guilty about. You would feel guilty whenever you stopped - or at least I did at 18 months. You have to consider other things in your life as expressing is hard and time consuming. If you have had enough then that is completely justified. I felt guilty for a while but the sense of relief more than compensated!

pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 18:29:42

It's hard as dd is autistic, and recently become more demanding, so sitting at a machine expressing x amount of times a day is hard, she and ds really need more of my time

Seriouslysleepdeprived Sun 14-Oct-12 18:32:00

I take my hate off to both of you. I tried e pressing for one feed a day & it totally stressed me out. To get to 7/9 months is amazing smile

r3dsquirrel Sun 14-Oct-12 18:35:25

If that's the case you really are amazing. Id never have made it this far if I had an older child as well. I agree that its much harder once they get mobile. That's the main reason I'm winding down too. I think there comes a point where the benefit of your time and attention outweighs the benefits of continuing to provide breastmilk. It took me a long time to come to terms with not breastfeeding 'properly' and I'd always thought I'd BF for a year. That said, I know I've done the best I could in a not ideal situation and so have you. We should be proud of that. I think there are a lot of hormonal changes as you stop BF too which will make you more emotional about it. In another few weeks you'll be able to look back at what you did for your ds and see how fantastic you are.

pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 18:35:30

I wish it could have been the more natural way but he just wouldn't latch

r3dsquirrel Sun 14-Oct-12 18:36:22

Thanks SSD

r3dsquirrel Sun 14-Oct-12 18:38:58

Piglet..... same here. I tried literally everything including 4 different lactation consultants but no joy. I was in pain and he was undernourished. Some babies just can't do it (and don't listen to anyone who tries to tell you otherwise..... I've worked in Africa and I've seen what happens to babies there who can't BF and their mothers don't have the luxury of pumps or formula).

pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 19:02:21

Thanks red for puttings it into respective and es you are right

CaroleService Sun 14-Oct-12 19:31:41

Could you maybe try putting him on now? I expressed for 4 months for my ds, who like your ds just couldn't/wouldn't latch on as a newborn. My lactation consultant advised me to come back to it at about 4 months and he took to it then like a duck to water!

pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 19:54:55

I honestly had not thought about it. I tried when hevwasabout 5 months and he bit down do hard it put me off

pigletmania Sun 14-Oct-12 20:15:33

Ds is teething and putting everything into his mouth and fear my delicate nipples might get ripped to shreds

CaroleService Sun 14-Oct-12 20:30:22

H'mmm, I can see your point.

Whatever else you do, don't beat yourself up. My LC also told me that 84% of the benefits of breast milk are passed on within the first 12 weeks of life, so 9m is a total victory.

balkanscot Sun 14-Oct-12 21:55:30

Piglet, wow, you have done an amazing job! smile wine thanks I had planned to express for 6 months (with formula top ups when needed) but had to give it all up at 12 weeks as I was heading for a serious breakdown (in the end I was diagnosed with mild PND) because of it. Just the sight of the pump was making me feel all anxious towards the end. Expressing is hard work and I take my hat off to you for persevering for so long.

I wish I could have BF, have tried BF clinics and a private lactation consultant, managed to BF for a bit with nipple shields. In the end I made a decision to keep expressing so that DS could get some benefit of my BM. Was doing pretty well as the ratio was 3/4 EBM + 1/4 formula per day. But the sheer hell of expressing so many times a day and not having any kind of life but being chained to the pump/couch took its toll - I became obsessed with amounts of EBM/Formula that DS was having each day, kept feeding charts (how much, when) and seriously stressing if DS left even a drop of milk in his bottle, etc., etc. For my own sanity I stopped when he was 12 weeks. And as for the feelings of crippling guilt...

It's OK now, have come to terms with stopping, have made some sort of peace and closure.

pigletmania Mon 15-Oct-12 05:41:47

Aww bless you balk so have you, hats off to you too smile. Now I only express 4 times a day as I cannot do every 2 hours it's impossible with a sn dd and a ds in the move, he needs me to be with him not on the machine, that is something that you need to balance out

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