Hi, I'm not really sure why I posting this but I guess I need some moral support about how I'm feeding my daughter. She's 10 weeks old and before she was born I suppose you could have called me a lactofascist (little did I know). I had a very medicalised pregnancy and an induced birth which ended up in an emergency C section. My daughter didn't latch on to my breast after the op. We got loads of help and support and she just couldn't do it. I had to pump every 3 hours in the hospital to get my milk to come in,which happened on day 6 and in the meantime my daughter became jaundiced and was given formula via cup and syringe.
The saga continued at home after discharge when she was 5 days old and I continued expressing, actually making enough to feed her without the need for formula. My daughter latched on with a nipple shield when she was 2 weeks old and I happily switched to "exclusively" breastfeeding but she wasn't putting on weight fast enough and was really antsy the whole time. After 10 days I realised my supply had pretty much dried up and switched back to pumping. This time however I couldn't get my supply up and after 5 days of pumping every 2 hours I had gone from getting 15ml per pump to about 40ml. I went on fenugreek and domperidone but I can still only get about 60ml per pump and my daughter is getting half formula and half breastmilk.
She was also diagnosed with a tongue tie and we had that divided when she was 8 weeks old but she doesn't even latch on to the nipple shield anymore as she gets frustrated so quickly. I have had a couple of successes with her latching on in the past week after a couple of sessions of cranial osteopathy but she pulls off crying after about 10 seconds as she's not getting any milk.
I am devastated by this turn of events and feel really angry and sad that I'm not going to be able to feed her. I've done everything I could to make it work but I still feel guilty. I also feel like I'm missing out on something really amazing and quite frankly I think I've failed the first motherhood test. I hate pumping and it takes a large chunk of time out of my day. I don't understand why breastfeeding hasn't worked or why my supply is so shite. All the books say if you stimulate your nipples enough your supply will increase but it hasn't worked that way for me.
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29 replies
Purpleprincess81 · 18/10/2011 00:02
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