Help for a friend. Dd 12 days old and BF

[Kayzr]

My friend had a baby 12 days ago and it's her first. She was determined to BF and I thought she was doing quite well. Her DD was 8lb 5oz when she was born. She dropped down to 8lb and has since steadily gained weight. Friday she was 8lb 4oz.

MW went for the last time on thursday and was very pleased with their progress. However the HV went for first time on Friday and told my friend that her baby wasn't getting enough milk and if by Monday she wasn't above her birth weight she would have to start giving formula top ups

Friend is now feeling really really down and like she isn't good enough as a mum. I've never seen her look as down as she did today.

I said I'd ask here for some other opinions. HV said everything looks fine with the baby just not being above her birth weight yet.

Any ideas? I really want to tell her something to make her stop thinking she's a rubbish mum.

Thanks

[EauRouge]

So the MW was pleased and the HV said everything looks OK but still says that baby isn't getting enough milk? Do you know if your friend had an epidural or drip during labour?

This might help her out-
Is my baby getting enough milk?

It sounds like she needs more support, especially since her confidence has been knocked. Is there a BF support group nearby? There's a list of LLL groups here as well as a national helpline. NCT has a helpline too- 0300 330 0771

[Kayzr]

No epidural but she had pethedine. I'll text her the helplines.

Her dad is a doctor so she very much thinks that everyone in the healthcare profession knows exactly what they are talking about.

[cluelessnchaos]

Sounds like hv is talking absolute nonsense, if your friend is concerned she should get baby weighed next Friday. Current thinking is a gain of 4oz a week before any intervention. She is doing really well and any supplementing at this stage will have a negative affect

[Kayzr]

I've just read that about the 4oz a week. I will tell her that. Her DH is going to make sure he's in for the next visit as he popped to the shop for the last one.

I just rang her and she's sounding a little happier.

[tiktok]

Kayzr - from what you say here there is no need for anyone to worry about this baby. The baby lost a little weight - normal - and started to gain it again - normal. She is an ounce of birthweight at 10 days - easily within normal.

The HV can probably be challenged - if the HV thinks the baby needs more milk (whyy?), then why would it have to be formula?

Why not simply more bf???

Hope things go well for her.

[Kayzr]

Tiktok the HV said that friends Dd should have been above or at least at birth weight by 10 days. Therefore baby isn't getting all it needs from mum. These are her reasons for needing to top up with formula.

I've just got off the phone to my friend who has been on the phone to one of the helplines for about 30 minutes. She said that the HV is wrong about it and that by Monday when she returns her DD should be at birth weight but not to give the top ups. She seems to be feeling better.

Friend is feeding Dd when she asks to be fed but not letting her go more than 2.5 - 3 hours between feeds.

[tiktok]

Well, I would wonder why the HV was so nit-pickingly pedantic - even on those rigid rules, the baby was an ounce below only, and was hardly a small baby anyway.

There are no rules about 'birthweight at 10 days' anywhere.

[Kayzr]

Well she's got back to her birth weight. Just had friend on the phone. HV said it's been very slow to get back to her birth weight. She said she might continue to monitor the situation. So friend told her she doesn't need HV to visit anymore and will take baby to be weighed at the clinic when she wants too. Apparently HV wasnt very happy by this.

Thank for the input.

[EauRouge]

Good on your friend for telling the HV where to go! It's not nice to have your confidence knocked so early on.

[Kayzr]

It was her Dad I think that persuaded her. She asked him to go round on his way to work this morning to give her DD a check over. He said she's fine, alert when awake, seems content and he thinks her weight gain looks normal. He's a normal GP and told her that she doesn't need to have her Dd weighed ever again if she didn't want too. So she told HV all this.

She seemed a million times happier on the phone

[cluelessnchaos]

Twelve days is not long for a breastfed baby to regain birthweight. It's sounds very normal well done your friend