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It's breaking my heart :(

(20 Posts)
tickleme63 Thu 29-Sep-11 21:12:43

Hi all,

I guess I'm looking for a little advice. I have a forceful letdown and oversupply I think - although my son has always had normal yellow poos, if a little on the explosive side. He is gaining weight really well - 4lb 13oz at birth, 13lb 9oz when weighed today.

My nearly-11-week-old little man seems to feed quite well at night - he pops off at let down, then manages quite well and settles back to sleep nicely.

However, the last couple of days he has been crying and screaming after he re-attaches following let down. He fights to get back on, takes a few sucks and then pulls off again crying. I wind him, try laying down with him, tried laid back positions, but nothing seems to help or console him. It's so upsetting. Its breaking my heart that he feels so miserable at the breast, I want it to be a place of warmth and comfort.

I'm block nursing at the moment to try and sort out my oversupply, but can anyone offer me any advice? I really don't want to quit breastfeeding, but I'm not sure how much more of this my heart can take

Thank you in advance.

WombOnTheBroom Thu 29-Sep-11 21:20:08

Big hugs (has he really gained nearly 9lb in 11 weeks - blimey you're doing well!). Do you think his behaviour might be a growth spurt - in which case it might ease off? Or could it be that you've eaten something he doesn't like the taste of? (I'm currently off thai and indian takeaways for the same reason...)

buttonmoon78 Thu 29-Sep-11 21:20:11

Poor you - it is totally heartbreaking when things aren't going right sad

Have you seen a bfc - someone who really knows what they're talking about, not just someone with an 'interest'?

As an aside - you must produce jersey gold top! 9lb in 11wks? I totally take my hat off to you. I have never really managed to bf and make mine (4dcs) put weight on so you've done considerably better than I ever have already!

girliefriend Thu 29-Sep-11 21:28:05

What does 'block' feeding mean?

I think you need to get yourself to a bfing support group, it may just be that he isn't hungry or has tummy ache or is over tired...

Don't give up!!! Am sure he will settle down again soon smile

CavemanDaveIsVeryBrave Thu 29-Sep-11 21:38:18

DD2 was a bit like this. I wondered if she actually didn't want the milk - that she just wanted to suck instead for comfort or to get to sleep. Bit difficult as you don't get one without the other. I tried a dummy but she wasn't that bothered. Then DP started taking her and having a little walk around the room, and most times she would fall asleep. It happened to me invariably in an evening.

grin at that marvellous weight gain!

tickleme63 Fri 30-Sep-11 08:33:02

Thank you all for your lovely comments - this is my first baby, and am really happy to hear how good his weight gain is.

I am going to the next LLL meeting near where I live, so will bring this up with the ladies there if it is still ongoing. I suppose it could be growth spurt related, but it seems that every little blip we have feeding-wise, it is blamed on growth spurts - I wonder how much is actually due to them.

Perhaps it is something I've eaten... my diet has been pretty shocking lately. But I wonder why it is that he eats absolutely fine at night - last night's feeds went without a hitch.

Sometimes that happens with us, CavemanDave - he acts really hungry, latches, unlatches, crying - DH takes him and he sometimes dozes straight off, so maybe he wanted to comfort suck but kept getting milk. That happens in the evening with us as well, but it's the fussy afternoon feeds that have me a bit stumped. We have also tried a dummy, but he's not keen at all...

tiktok Fri 30-Sep-11 09:19:37

sad sad

Some mothers with hugely generous milk supplies (as yours seems to be) have to block feed so that each breast is only used once every 6 hours or so....and they do this for several days. A milk supply like yours needs firm and ferocious 'taming' and it's only when this happens that things improve.
Are you ok to hang on in there with the block feeding and give it a few days to have an effect?

tiktok Fri 30-Sep-11 09:20:33

BTW, I don;t think it sounds anything like growth spurts. Doubtful that it is something you have eaten.

My money is on your supply - you check all the boxes.

TheRealMBJ Fri 30-Sep-11 09:28:13

I agree with tiktok, it does sound like a generous supply.

On a personal note, I had a similar problem with DS and found that feeding him when he was sleepy helped a lot. He seemed to suckle more gently and not get as upset by the let-down. Definitely try block nursing consistently for a few days to tame your supply.

MonkeeMummy Fri 30-Sep-11 09:48:26

I'm feeling your pain and was in the same situation last week but things have improved 100 percent since I started block feeding.

My now 6wk old DD was feeding/sleeping/gaining loads of weight but 10 or so days ago started crying during feeds and seeming really uncomfortable. It was worst at night when she'd seem to try to feed but keep pulling off crying/squirming for hours. It was awful seeing her in so much pain and Infacol/cool boiled water (suggested by HV) made no difference at all to her.

I have loads of milk and I know they say you can't overfeed a BF baby but I'm sure this was our problem, so I started block feeding every 3hrs (changing breast every 6hrs, as Tiktok suggests) and NOT feeding in the middle of the night. If she wakes up at 3/4 I give her a dummy for 10mins and she immediately settles back to sleep (so not hungry, then!). I've been doing this for 3 days and fingers-crossed it seems to have sorted the problem. I have my happy baby back and the only problem is that I wake up at 3am drowning in milk grin and I'm too damn lazy tired to do anything about it.

Hang in there and hope you managed to get it sorted.

tickleme63 Fri 30-Sep-11 09:54:06

Thank you Tiktok and MBJ - I know I'm really quite lucky to have the problem of too much than too little, but I sometimes find myself cursing my boobs, especially when we have days like yesterday.

I've been using one breast for two feedings in a row for a while, would you suggest that I use one breast for three feedings ( he feeds every 2 hours normally). Is there a maximum amount I should remove from the other breast, or is it simply enough to remain comfortable?

I was feeling very low yesterday but I'm simply not ready to call it quits yet, we worked so hard to get breastfeeding established after he wouldn't latch on after a difficult birth and when it works, it is amazing (if a little milk-sodden...!)

Thank you all again for your advice.

ShowOfHands Fri 30-Sep-11 10:00:25

Hang on in there with the block feeding. DD was the same. I had a very generous milk supply and around 13 weeks (actually at exactly the same time as my period came back- dd fed more in the few days beforehand as my supply actually dipped and I think the increased sucking without the growth spurt meant that my supply increased artificially iyswim) dd behaved in the same way. I ended up with blocked ducts and mastitis before we sorted it out.

BUT we did sort it and she went in 6 months of exclusive feeding from 7lbs ish to 25lbs ish on breastmilk alone.

tiktok Fri 30-Sep-11 10:01:17

Glad you've now got something to hope for, tickle smile

My suggestion would be to avoid doing no more to the 'other' unused side bar the very minimal needed to stay comfortable. Many women with supplies like yours don't even need to do anything as they leak all over the place sad and this prevents problematic 'bursting' feelings. A bit. It takes a few days to tame. Just watch and gently feel and look for lumps and bumps or red patches.

Each breast has a 6 hour gap - so every time he feeds within that 6 hour block, he comes to breast 1. Then move to breast 2 and use that one for the next 6 hours.

Most women who block feed don't need to leave it 6 hours - my guess is that you do.

tickleme63 Fri 30-Sep-11 10:02:31

And thank you Monkee, that's great to hear. DS won't take a dummy yet, but is still waking often at night to feed - he manage to sleep 8.30 till 1am for a feed and then through to 4am for a second feed the other night, but last night he was up 3/4 times as usual - he gulps down his milk so he must be hungry, must he?

He's currently napping on me after a feed - he had a nap from 8-9am, then woke hungry, fed/gulped for 10 mins, and has zonked back out again...

TheRealMBJ Fri 30-Sep-11 10:06:47

I certainly found that I didn't really need to express much at all from the other side as my let down was stimulated on the non-feeding side. I would hand express just a little if I still felt uncomfortable.

tickleme63 Fri 30-Sep-11 10:11:16

Thanks Show, it's really reassuring to hear that these things are 'treatable' - I really want feeding to be a happy time for us both.

Tiktok, thank you - I will give that a good go, starting today. I do tend to have letdowns randomly throughout the day and both breasts usually leak a little - I've never woken up sodden though, and dont seem to soak through breastpads...

MonkeeMummy Fri 30-Sep-11 11:32:58

Glad to hear that DS is happier today. It's early days for us too but the change has been instantaneous. The nights were the main problem for me because I was feeding as much as pos at 10pm (to encourage her to sleep for a good stretch) and she was waking at 1pm and 4pm seeming hungry but being v.difficult to feed followed by bouts of crying made worse by lying her flat (arching back, stiff and wailing). Whereas, letting her take what she wants at 10pm (only about 10mins) seems to make her sleep through confused.

I don't pretend to understand the mechanics of it even though she's my third BF baby and am still worried that not feeding enough at night will affect my supply but still too lazy to get out the breast pump but letting her take the lead seems to be working so it might be a case (for me, at least) that baby knows best.

tickleme63 Fri 30-Sep-11 13:26:20

May I ask a silly question about block feeding? So, if I am using one breast for 6 hours, say 7am to 1pm, does the next 6 hours begin from 1pm, or do I start the next time block from the next feed after 1pm?

tiktok Fri 30-Sep-11 13:37:58

To have a 6 hr block, you would feed from breast 1 at 7 pm, and then again every time the baby comes to the breast until 1 am....and at 1 am you use breast 2. If the baby does not feed at 1 pm, then it would be the feed after. If he wants to feed before 1 am, then common sense prevails - feed him from breast 2 if it's after 12.30 smile

tickleme63 Fri 30-Sep-11 13:44:03

Gotcha, many thanks Tiktok smile

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