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4mth old still waking in the night - am I feeding too much?!

(23 Posts)
GiggidyGiggidy Sat 10-Sep-11 13:11:33

I wasn't sure whether to put this under development or feeding so I have put it under both! I am a first time mum, and my dd is 19 weeks old and weighs a healthy 15lb 4oz. She is bottle fed and is generally a good eater, having around 30-35oz during the day depending on how hungry she is. However she is still waking during the night for a feed, albeit only once (anytime between 1-5am), and then will eventually go back to sleep until morning. I thought this was quite good, however a few friends and family members have been saying that she should be sleeping through at this age (she has never slept through once!).

Is this the case and how can I wean her off this bottle? My mum suggested I could start gradually decreasing the amount she has during the night until she no longer needs it. But I am concerned she will be still hungry and won't sleep. Somebody else suggested water?! I can't leave her to cry as I still think she is too young for that. And I do not want to start weaning just yet (as has also been suggested!).

Another question is that if she is having this night feed, it takes the amount she is having to over 40oz in 24 hours. I have read in one book that the amont she only needs 20oz, and then somewhere else it stated 32oz. So am I giving too much?! I don't want to be over feeding her but I don't want her to be hungry either

Any info or advice will be appreciated

RitaMorgan Sat 10-Sep-11 15:13:41

Of course she is still waking in the night, she's only 4 months old! Most 4 month olds wake at least once in the night, so you are doing pretty well there.

To get the amount of formula she needs a day, multiply her weight in lbs by 2.5 to get the number of oz. So, 15.5x2.5 = about 38oz a day. This will vary a little from baby to baby of course, but it sounds like you are doing ok.

If you are worried she is feeding too much, try offering a dummy instead of a bottle in case she wants to comfort suck - or try offering a little less milk for the night feed. If she's hungry I'd feed her though.

20oz is the minimum amount of formula a day needed by a 6-12month old baby who is also eating solid food btw.

TheGrassIsJewelled Sat 10-Sep-11 15:33:40

My 4 month old used to wake once or twice. Now she's 7 months and wakes once - very occasionally she'll sleep through.
All normal, just ignore those with the 12hr angels!!!

Natzer Sat 10-Sep-11 16:01:14

I know it is rare for a 4 month old to sleep through, but mine did. But only after watering down her night time feed and decreasing it. In the end it wasn't worth her while waking in the night.

(Yes I may well get some stick for this but it worked and my dd is a very very happy healthy baby)

She is a big baby and has 32oz (20 weeks - 18 lbs) of formula a day.

She does now occasionally wake up once during the night (maybe once in 10 days) but now she just takes her dummy and goes back to sleep.

I know that people have real troubles getting babies to sleep through. But its worth a try, you might be one of the lucky ones!

scampbeast Sat 10-Sep-11 17:15:34

I would wake my son before I went to bed and feed him, that kept him going through the night. I only stopped when I had him on more solids and was cutting down on his feeds anyway. Sometimes they are just all different, my friends daughter was still waking through the night at 10 months.

peedieworky Sat 10-Sep-11 18:29:08

Similar to Natzer (sort of!), my DS used to wake around 3/4am for a quick feed. I hadn't actually questioned it but one night I had been out on the ran-dan socialising and had agreed DH would give him a bottle as my milk would be rather tequila-ey! To cut a long story short, the bottle wasn't ready in advance (I give DH one task...) and then in rushing, he spilt it all so had to start from scratch.. While he fannied around being histrionic was doing that, I just cuddled DS to stop him having a meltdown (tequila was wearing off by this stage..) and was amazed he dozed off before the bottle appeared & slept right through till morning. So the next night I cuddled first rather than fed and he did the same thing. Third night he went straight through. He's still gaining weight and getting plenty wet/dirty nappies so seems he's fine without that feed. To be honest though, I reckon he'd have done it himself as he was ready so it was kinda coincidence & agree with all the other posters who say it's very much down to the individual baby.

Booboostoo Sat 10-Sep-11 18:32:19

My 3.5 month old wakes up 2-3 times and if she doesn't I just pop a nipple in her mouth anyway as I can feel my breasts letting down. I would think it's pretty normal for that age and I would still feed on demand.

Harecare Sat 10-Sep-11 18:33:05

Only one night feed at 4 months is something many would envy. Let him drop it in his own time.

Choufleur Sat 10-Sep-11 18:36:34

Ds didn't sleep through til 2 1/2 (years that is not months). Once a night at 4 months sounds pretty good tbh. She's very little. Don't listen to smug people who says their babies sleep through. They are the odd ones not your baby.

Natzer Sat 10-Sep-11 19:10:05

Choufleur a short message from a smug odd person. Maybe you did it all wrong and that's why your baby wouldn't sleep.

One swipe deserves another hmm

Its all down to the individual babies, some sleep through at that age and others don't. I don't see anything wrong in at least trying different ways to get them too, especially if losing the sleep deprivation means you are able to cope better.

TheGrassIsJewelled Sat 10-Sep-11 19:14:08

<ignores brewing row>

I'm trying the cuddle approach tonight, instead of a bottle. Wish me luck!

rubyslippers Sat 10-Sep-11 19:17:41

They have a growth spurt at 16 weeks or so

TBH, if your child settles after a feed then to me, getting up and doing that and guaranteeing more sleep is better than a baby crying for ages whilst you cuddle them

If your DD wakes for her feed, goes BACK to sleep as you say in your OP then she NEEDS the feed so IMO keep on doing it for now

rubyslippers Sat 10-Sep-11 19:18:08

Does she finish the bottle at the night feed?

Choufleur Sat 10-Sep-11 19:35:14

Natzer - didn't say you did it all wrong fwiw. Was just trying to make the OP feel better that her DD didn't sleep through.

You sound a bit touchy tbh.

HumphreyCobbler Sat 10-Sep-11 19:39:25

I think it is normal to feed in the night at four months.

People whose children sleep through are lucky <jealous>

Natzer Sat 10-Sep-11 19:44:31

Choufleur I just don't see why I come under fire for stating that my dd did sleep through, and offering some advice.

After all it was advice the OP was after.

I did balance it by saying that I know that alot don't sleep though.

Choufleur Sat 10-Sep-11 19:55:25

I wasn't having a go at you. Just said generally that most babies don't sleep though so they are the odd ones. You took it personally and then you said I did it wrong.

peedieworky Sat 10-Sep-11 21:30:21

Blimey! Clearly I have very thick skin as never even spotted the swipe. Maybe that's cos I am smug grin. Just kidding! Am not offended Choufleur

Sleep through - tick! Reliably take a bottle so can spend time away from me...erm, nope! Go down for a nap during the day without a battle...erm, nope! Go down to sleep at night without me feeding him to sleep...erm, nope!

<removes smug pants>

TheGrassIsJewelled good luck! My DS never took a dummy but was happily sooking on my little finger when he snored off. Either that or it was my tequila fumed breath!

Biggem Sat 10-Sep-11 21:51:57

peedieworky thought it was just me with a 4 month old doing that...please tell me I'm not alone in wanting some me time!?

peedieworky Mon 12-Sep-11 10:23:28

Not at all! Though I am the master of my own downfall... Horrible control freak so hard to hand over - even though I desperately want to!

cantmakecarrotcake Mon 12-Sep-11 11:05:27

My nearly 8 month DD is still waking once a night for a feed. But then she's not really taking to solids so expect she still needs the nighttime calories.

Very few (if any) of my friends had babies sleeping through at 4 months. I'd say it was a (lucky) rarity rather than the norm.

I'm also in the 'horrible control freak' camp. I'm wanting 'me time' but when it comes to handing over I often decide it's easier for me to do it.

GiggidyGiggidy Sat 17-Sep-11 20:05:46

Wow, thanks for all the input! I thought she was doing well tbh, but can't help question myself when others are telling me different! I think I'll continue to give the feed, but eventually try and cut her down as Natzer said, rather than stop completely one night.... I'm optimistically hoping she will be sleeping through by the time she goes in her own room!!

organiccarrotcake Sat 17-Sep-11 22:54:11

I think the point is that this is quite normal behaviour (in the sense that she's night waking and needing milk), and as has been mentioned you're "lucky" in that she's only waking once (I know it won't feel lucky smile ). Should you choose to try to night wean, that's your choice and if it works for you and your baby, that's fab. Should you decide to carry on as you are, you can be reassured that her behaviour is completely normal. You've also had some reassurance on the amount of formula you're giving, so hopefully that'll make you feel better, and that you don't HAVE to night wean from that perspective (unless, of course, you choose to try).

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