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Struggling with feeding on demand at 14 wo.

(4 Posts)
haloflo Wed 06-Jul-11 14:23:40

You'd think by now I would know what I'm doing? It feels like I really don't. DD is 14 wo. She feeds 12-15 times a day never more than 3 hours apart including the night. During the day I offer feeds regularly (1.5-2 hours) in an attempt to "tank" her up for the night. Because of this her feeds are often short (3 minutes, if that) She is easily distracted and pulls off sometimes just as my (rather forceful) letdown happens. Is this because she isn't hungry? Should I stop doing this?

If she isn't hungry when do I feed? I know crying is a late sign of hunger but I want to be able to pre-empt this. I feel such a rubbish mum for not being able to read her hunger signs. I've noticed that sometimes she roots but then when I offer a feed she refuses & she is actually tired. It's just too confusing.

She never goes for more than 3 hours in the night now. We did have a 5 hour stretch once but it was weeks ago. She sleeps in a bed side cot, co sleeps from about 3am onwards or she'd be up every hour. Last night was a typical night, sleeping 7.30-10, 10.30-1.00, 1.15-2.30, 3.30-5.30 & then 5.30-7.

Overnight her nappies are massively wet & 3 nights out of the last 7 she has done a poo in the middle of the night, making her very awake & hard to settle.

BFC has advised me to block nurse as she might be getting more foremilk than hindmilk which hopefully will help but I wondered if anyone else had any ideas?

I feel I'm getting it all wrong as other babies seem to feed & then be content. I hardly even know what "a feed" is. Lots of babies may not sleep through but they at least go 5/6 hours at the start of the night. It's getting me down, probably because I'm just so tired. I considered a bottle of EBM but she hasn't been given a bottle since 4 wo and I daren't wake her too much at night in case it takes ages for her to settle. It feels like a vicious cycle where I should try to make her go longer at night by settling but I'm too tired to do anything but feed.

I occasionally co sleep for naps but often she needs motion for naps (bouncy chair/pram) Plus they often last 30-45 minutes so no time for me to nap at the same time. If I want to co sleep for a nap & she refuses I get so upset as I'm drifting off as she gets her energy back so often I don't bother.
She has a dummy for naps/to get her to sleep at 7/7.30 but spits it out after 10/15 minutes without waking.

Sorry if this long but any thoughts/reassurances? Anyone elses baby like this?

Thanks in advance for any replies.

haloflo Wed 06-Jul-11 14:24:01

You'd think by now I would know what I'm doing? It feels like I really don't. DD is 14 wo. She feeds 12-15 times a day never more than 3 hours apart including the night. During the day I offer feeds regularly (1.5-2 hours) in an attempt to "tank" her up for the night. Because of this her feeds are often short (3 minutes, if that) She is easily distracted and pulls off sometimes just as my (rather forceful) letdown happens. Is this because she isn't hungry? Should I stop doing this?

If she isn't hungry when do I feed? I know crying is a late sign of hunger but I want to be able to pre-empt this. I feel such a rubbish mum for not being able to read her hunger signs. I've noticed that sometimes she roots but then when I offer a feed she refuses & she is actually tired. It's just too confusing.

She never goes for more than 3 hours in the night now. We did have a 5 hour stretch once but it was weeks ago. She sleeps in a bed side cot, co sleeps from about 3am onwards or she'd be up every hour. Last night was a typical night, sleeping 7.30-10, 10.30-1.00, 1.15-2.30, 3.30-5.30 & then 5.30-7.

Overnight her nappies are massively wet & 3 nights out of the last 7 she has done a poo in the middle of the night, making her very awake & hard to settle.

BFC has advised me to block nurse as she might be getting more foremilk than hindmilk which hopefully will help but I wondered if anyone else had any ideas?

I feel I'm getting it all wrong as other babies seem to feed & then be content. I hardly even know what "a feed" is. Lots of babies may not sleep through but they at least go 5/6 hours at the start of the night. It's getting me down, probably because I'm just so tired. I considered a bottle of EBM but she hasn't been given a bottle since 4 wo and I daren't wake her too much at night in case it takes ages for her to settle. It feels like a vicious cycle where I should try to make her go longer at night by settling but I'm too tired to do anything but feed.

I occasionally co sleep for naps but often she needs motion for naps (bouncy chair/pram) Plus they often last 30-45 minutes so no time for me to nap at the same time. If I want to co sleep for a nap & she refuses I get so upset as I'm drifting off as she gets her energy back so often I don't bother.

She has a dummy for naps/to get her to sleep at 7/7.30 but spits it out after 10/15 minutes without waking.

Sorry if this long but any thoughts/reassurances? Anyone elses baby like this?

Thanks in advance for any replies.

haloflo Wed 06-Jul-11 14:24:25

Sorry double post, too tired to work the PC!

RitaMorgan Wed 06-Jul-11 14:29:26

Maybe just try a day of only offering when she asks (I would offer whenever my ds was rooting, whingy or unsettled - sometimes he did end up crying for a feed though so don't worry about missing early signs!) and see how it goes?

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