I'm due with my second in October. Last time a familiar old story DD wouldn't latch on with 3 midwives help, I got frustrated as it wasn't working and switched to FF. I don't regret it, don't feel guilty or have bad feelings towards it. I think it was my decision at the time and I relaxed a little afterwards.
Anyway first question.
I know it can take a few days for the milk to come in but how did you deal with the time inbetween when baby was hungry etc? Did your DC cry a lot during those few days and when did it all calm down. I know soon after my DC1 was born the midwife gave her a bottle because she was obviously hungry.
Second question. How do you think DC1 would react to DC2 being breastfed if she was bottlefed? She will be 2 years old when this one arrives so I would be interested to hear anyone else who had been in a similar position.
for the first few days colostrum is all your baby will need and it will fill him/her up. i did find on day 4 when my milk still hadn't come in that they wanted feeding a LOT, literally every 20-30 minutes, but that's not necessarily a bad thing! frequent feeding is sending signals to your body that milk is needed, and it's great for building up your supply and keeping it up
so, it can be very intense and you may spend a lot of time feeding baby but it is (in my opinion anyway) really worth it! in the long-term it's definitely easier than bottle feeding (i've done both)
mine were much calmer and more settled once my milk came in and they could have a great big feed and then sleep, that was day 5 for me but i think that's quite late and most people get their milk in before then.
as for your second question.... i really doubt your older child will be bothered at all! she will only be 2... she will really have no idea. you on the other hand may have other feelings... i felt really bad breastfeeding ds2 past 4.5 months (which is when i stopped with ds1), but that passes
i was never much of a leaker actually, i think it varies a lot. for a little while with ds3 i slept with a towel under me, but am sure it had calmed down by the time he was around a week old or thereabouts