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Breastfeeding, sleeping and nursery - 2 questions.

(20 Posts)
Zimm Wed 22-Jun-11 09:33:26

Hi all,

Currently having to BF 10 month DD to sleep and for her naps. She was self-settling but it has all gone a bit wrong and now she just screams. She will go to sleep for her dad without being fed (sometimes). She is generally a bad napper - 2 powers naps per day. My question is - if you have to feed your dc to sleep when they are with you how did they manage at nursery? And yes, in an ideal world I will have her self-settling before she starts nursery (6 weeks) but I am going on worst case scenario.

I have a second question - DD still Bfs a lot during the day and I would prefer she is able to continue to do this on the days we are together (she will be in nursery 3 days a week, on those days I will offer a breakfast, teatime and sleep time feed). She doesn't eat loads in the way of solids. We will both adapt? E.g. will she take more solids at nursery (she eats better in company anyway) and will my supply cope with not doing dya feeds a few times a week? I heard things are very adaptable if you have been BF-ing for a long time. I do not want to have to express at work and to be honest I can't seeing myself having the time/energy to send her to nursery with EBM - so if she wants day milk it will be formula, but I would she upped her solids intake instead really.

Many thanks in advance for your wise words!

AchtungBaby Wed 22-Jun-11 09:40:23

Zimm, not much advice I'm afraid, but I'll be in a similar-ish situation when I go back to work in 8 weeks.

DS (who will then be 11 months) currently needs ~5mins of chest stroking / rubbing to go to sleep for naps. I'm worried about whether his CM will have time to do this.

He BFs 2x during the day (+ once in the morning and evening), but I don't want to express at work etc, so hope he will drink formula when he's at the CM's. I plan to BF him during the day on days off and at the w/es though, so I hope I just adapt! My first day back at work might be inteteresting otherwise blush.

Good luck.

AchtungBaby Wed 22-Jun-11 09:47:08

Just to add, DS had a very strong feed:sleep association at ~6 months, and we had to make a concerted effort to break it (sounds awful, but it really wasn't that bad!).

My understanding is that you should work on going to sleep unaided at the beginning of the night first, before tackling naps.

We used gradual withdrawal; so bath, milk, teeth, book, cot, sitting next to cot, shh-ing, stroking / rubbing etc, then gradually withdrawing the amount of contact (this is the bit we're having trouble with grin.

Zimm Wed 22-Jun-11 10:08:49

Thanks Achtung - it's so annoying because we did gradual withdrawal too and she was self-settling - but then teething hit and it's all gone to pot.

CMOTdibbler Wed 22-Jun-11 10:11:17

DS always fed to sleep at home, and nursery sorted out their own way of getting him to sleep - I didn't do anything !

EvelynBakerLang Wed 22-Jun-11 10:18:48

Same as CMOT. DD went to nursery at 10 months. She napped beautifully for them until she was 2.5. I, on the other hand, had to put her in a pushchair and wheel her round for 20 minutes to get her to sleep. Nurseries are magic, I tell you.

Re: BF... I cut down to two a day before she started nursery and she loved her solids, so I didn't worry. But whenever she was ill I was able to feed her in the day with no problems, so I never had difficulty with extra supply, if you see what I mean.

RitaMorgan Wed 22-Jun-11 10:22:16

At ds's nursery they give him his dummy and rock/cuddle him to sleep.

zacklesMum Wed 22-Jun-11 10:27:47

DS (18 months) is fed to sleep for all naps and at night, on all days that I am with him. On the 3 days he spends with his childminder, she gets him to nap (magic, in the buggy) and she has no more difficulty with him than with his formula-fed 'colleagues'. I don't think it's worth worrying about.

He still breastfeeds loads, so I do have to express once a day at work, but it's for my own comfort, as he rarely drinks expressed milk. DS is happy drinking water and eating food when I am away, and we've been doing it like this for 8 months now.

LakeFlyPie Wed 22-Jun-11 10:30:50

I worried about this with DS1 when I went back to work P/T when he was 12mo.

It was fine, TBH I think the nursery are far more experienced than I was at recognising when babies are ready for a sleep and getting them to go down in a cot.
I still bf him to sleep on his days at home.

Supply wise it wasn't a problem either, he bf as usual on home days and before and after nursery on work days with no noticeable difference in supply / comfort.
I found the bf a lovely way to reconnect after a day at work /nursery.

Good luck, am sure it'll be fine smile

Cosmosis Wed 22-Jun-11 10:41:33

I agree with everyone else, it will be fine. Ds was still mostly fed to sleep when he started at the CMs and she has found her own ways of getting him to sleep with no crying involved.

Your supply will also be well enough established now to feed on demand when you’re with her and not when you’re not. You may have to express a bit at first for comfort on the days you’re at work though.

My DS really upped his solids intake when he started at the CMs.

Zimm Wed 22-Jun-11 13:59:08

Thanks all - very reassuring. Was going to talk to HV about this issue and then thought better of it and came on here :-) Really hate the idea of expressing at work, they'd have to let me I know but it would go down like a lead ballon! Oh well worst case I can take my manual pump and do it on the sly in the loo at lunch! Yeah I know, I shouldn't have to but if it's only short term....better dig out the breastpads.

Cosmosis Wed 22-Jun-11 14:04:10

Why don’t you think it would go down well? I work in the offices of a factory, in an atomsphere which is very much work hard, stay late etc etc, so you would think they wouldn’t be great about it, but they have been fab, I cannot fault them.

organiccarrotcake Wed 22-Jun-11 16:32:57

I am lucky that my nursery is very close to work so I nip out in breaks to feed him. Works really well. But I second everyone else that the nurseries are great at getting difficult sleepers to sleep. My DS2 won't sleep at all at home unless he's fed to sleep or he's in the car (therefore technically not at home, I know!!) but has no probs at nursery, the little bugger.

Zimm Wed 22-Jun-11 18:57:40

cosimos - difficult to explain really....they just wouldn't 'get it'. TBH I really really don't want to do it anyway. I want to be at work, when I am at work if you see what I mean. Juts my preference.

Cosmosis Thu 23-Jun-11 09:10:25

That’s fair enough, I can understand that smile

worldgonecrazy Thu 23-Jun-11 09:19:18

At 10 months you can probably manage just doing morning/evening/night feeds, so don't worry about expressing at work. Funnily enough, it was about this age I stopped expressing during the day - DD switched to one drink of cows milk mid morning, and water for the rest of the time. Your daughter should manage to eat enough calories during the day, and she will make up any lost feeds when she is able to breastfeed from you. I stopped bf completely at 15 months.

AchtungBaby Thu 23-Jun-11 09:27:51

Zimm, as I mentioned above, I also don't want to express at work. This is for several reasons:

DS will be over 11 months old, so I'm not sure that all of the associated faff is really necessary. If he was significantly younger, I would do it.

It would be quite a faff, and as I'm a natural worrier, I wouldn't trust that the fridge-stored BM was okay once I'd transported it (however carefully!) home.

I'd be the first person at my work (that I know of) to do this. Of course, I'm not letting this make my decision for me, but I do feel that they'd be a little hmm confused by the request.

As DS will continue to BF at home, I'll have to be risk assessed regarding the use of several chemicals at work, then I'll probably have to ask colleagues to do one or two things for me on a regular basis sad.

Zimm Thu 23-Jun-11 10:10:02

Achtung - that sounds like a hassle! I would def by teh first person to do it at my work also - and it's not a trail I can be bothered to blaze!

worldgonecrazy -I know many babies are morning and evening only at this age but DD does like her day feeds so I would ideally continue them when we are together.

worldgonecrazy Thu 23-Jun-11 11:51:08

Zimm there is no need for you to stop daytime feeds when you're around. I used to do daytime breastfeeds at weekends with no problem, so I don't think you will have a problem with daytime feeding 4 days out of 7.

Cosmosis Thu 23-Jun-11 12:57:44

I agree, you should have no problem feeding when you're with him but not when you're not - after initial adjsutment period while your supply settles down.

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