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Breastfeeding a toddler and a newborn... anyone else?

(21 Posts)
BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Wed 22-Jun-11 08:52:46

DD is 19 months, DS is a fortnight old and I'm still trying to get the hang of it.

I've found the Hilary Flower book "Adventures in tandem nursing" really helpful, though it tends to assume a larger age gap between the children being BF.

I'd love to chat to and share experiences with anyone else...

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh Wed 22-Jun-11 09:15:20

Watching with interest as we will have exactly the same age gap when dc2 arrives in sept.

Have also read adventures are while it was brilliant much of the tandem stuff does seen to rely on a level of understanding and language that i can't see ds acquiring in the next three months...

I have been pretending to bf his toys, as suggested in the book, and ds thinks this is hillarious. He keeps bringing me random stuff to bf...kitchen tongs, remote controls, pegs confused so hopefully when the baby wants a go it shouldn't be too much of a problem. As long as the frog will move over! grin

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Wed 22-Jun-11 09:40:14

That's such a good idea! I wish I'd tried it.

A friend used to have a doll for her DC1 to "breastfeed" whenever she could only feed one at once...

EauRouge Wed 22-Jun-11 09:50:00

Congratulations on your new DS smile

There was a slightly bigger age gap between mine DD1 was 28 mo when DD2 arrived. What is it exactly that you're struggling with? I found it was a good few weeks before I got the hang of it. One thing I kept reminding myself was that although DD1 and I were old hands at BF, DD2 was new to it and needed a bit of practice. It was a bit of a shock trying to BF a child that couldn't quite latch on sometimes! But it all settle down after a few weeks.

TruthSweet Wed 22-Jun-11 10:58:27

I'm tandeming a toddler and a pre-schooler atm but have tandemed a newborn and a 20/22m old twice now. It is quite peculiar go from a toddler who needs no help to feed to a newborn who needs all your hands to help them to latch. It wasn't such a shock the second time around but it definitely took some getting used to wink

The easiest way I found to feed both at the same time (only fed DD1 & DD2 together) was to get boob out for elder then latch baby on then let elder get themselves sorted. Trying to latch a baby on with a toddler already feeding was too tricky for me.

I only tandem nursed for 8 weeks before moving to feeding DD1 & DD2 separately and we nursed that way for another 20-odd months until DD1 self weaned. DD2 & DD3 haven't ever nursed together in 20m though DD3 did think about it this morning when DD2 was nursing but decided to wait her turn.

JellyBellies Wed 22-Jun-11 16:41:57

I have a 26 month gap between DS1 and DS2. In the last few months of my pregnancy I cut down a lot on DS1s feeds as it was too painful. Now he wants to feed when he sees me feeding DS2. Which I don't mind but once hengets on , he does not stop! He feeds until I make him stop , usually after 10 to 15 min when it gets uncomfortable for me. And then cries because I have made him stop sad

Sorry for the thread hijack! But anyon have a solution for this?

JellyBellies Wed 22-Jun-11 16:42:54

Sorry for the crappy typing. Struggling on the iPod!

TheRealMBJ Wed 22-Jun-11 17:29:58

Watching with intrest too as DS will be 22 months when DD is born.

<waves at Moonface>

He's not feeding that much anymore but he is still very attached to it. I am also worried about the logistics of it tbh. dS is such an acrobatic feeder. confused

WoTmania Wed 22-Jun-11 18:48:31

I DS2 was 20 months when DD arrived. We're a long way past that but happy to chat about/compare smile

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh Thu 23-Jun-11 21:28:05

Wot your age gap is nearly identical to mine. Any pearls gratefully recieved! smile

Hi Mbj! grin

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Fri 24-Jun-11 07:33:12

Enjoying this thread. Certainly, it has taken me by surprise that DS seems to need so much help latching on (not that DD didn't, but I've got so used to her attacking me like a suction hose...)

<I am also worried about the logistics of it tbh. dS is such an acrobatic feeder.>

MBJ DD was the same whilst I was pregnant, but has really settled down now. I think it was more due to pregnancy reducing my milk supply, and a belief that approaching my nipple from all angles would yield more than an inherent love of gymnastics. So you may find that once you have plenty of milk after DD arrives that DS is OK...

WoTmania Fri 24-Jun-11 10:01:37

MoonFace - No perals I'm afarid, I struggle along like everyone else. what is your age gap? I'm regretful and jolly please at once that I didn't end up tandem nursing DSs1&2 DS1 was 3.2 when DD was born and if he hadn't stopped trying to fit 3 in nursing sounds like a nightmare. I know people do it and it's different when you are in the middle of stuff as you just get on with it but the thought gives me the shivers

WoTmania Fri 24-Jun-11 10:02:43

Oh, and I rarely nursed them both at once - I hated it. In emergencies only.

Gilberte Fri 24-Jun-11 10:14:06

Jellybellies

My DD1(3.5) does like to continue after baby has come off. I prefer to nurse both at the same time as it stops DD1 twiddling which I find more of an irritation these days.

I tend to ask DD1 to finish up or say I need to get up to make a drink etc and could she come off after 10- I normally only have to count to 3 and she comes off without a fuss.

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh Fri 24-Jun-11 10:30:32

Wot thankyou. I have heard others say nursing both at once wasn't enjoyable. I'm hoping i (and they) will like it, so i can have a few moments of both being still and quiet <optimist emoticon>

msbuggywinkle Fri 24-Jun-11 11:10:42

I tandem nursed the DDs, and as DD1 has more or less weaned now (has a go about once a week for a few seconds!) I'll probably be tandem nursing DD2 and DC3 when they arrive. I tandem nursed for just over two years.

I found it a big juggling act for the first 8 weeks as DD1 went back to exclusive breast feeding, although it did make some things easier, I could just curl up on the sofa, they'd both latch on then I could read a book! I didn't mind nursing both at once, actually it seemed to help DD2 feed more easily as she didn't have to work so hard to get a let down.

Mostly, I really enjoyed tandem nursing, especially as DD2 got older. DD1 would ask if she wanted milk and they'd both come and jump on me! When DD2 was born, my milk came in quickly and I'll never forget DD1's face when she latched on, got a huge mouthful of milk, came off and kissed DD2 yelling 'Oh, you brought our milky back, thank you baby!'

TheRealMBJ Fri 24-Jun-11 11:13:20

How sweet! What a wonderful way for your DD1 to accept and appreciate DD2.

<gush>

MoonFaceMamaaaaargh Fri 24-Jun-11 12:29:52

That is the sweetest thing ever! Brought a tear to my eye!

TheRealMBJ Fri 24-Jun-11 12:31:20

Me too! (If DS is still feeding, I hope we can have a similar experience!)

msbuggywinkle Fri 24-Jun-11 13:54:47

I know, it is the thing I always tell people who are going to be tandem nursing and are worried about it. It is intense, but so so wonderful.

Now DD2 is a bit less interested in babies than DD1 but as my supply is starting to drop she has got the idea that 'baby tummy' (her words!) will bring lots of milk and that she and baby tummy can have milk together.

BreastmilkDoesAFabLatte Fri 24-Jun-11 15:45:35

Ahhh that's lovely.

DD also very much appreciates the upsurge in supply now DS is here, but hasn't yet linked it to him...

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