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DARING GREATLY - Brené Brown - 50 copies of NY bestseller to giveaway

(33 Posts)
RachelMumsnet (MNHQ) Thu 13-Jun-13 10:10:17

Brené Brown's book Daring Greatly has taken the US by storm and her TED talk is one of the top ten most watched TED talks of all time with approximately 10 million views. The book challenges the idea that vulnerability is a weakness and that by shutting ourselves off from our vulnerabilities we distance ourselves from the experiences that bring purpose and meaning to our lives. The book is a culmination of 12 years of social research, across every area of our lives including home, relationships, work, and parenting.

Watch her TED talk and apply for a free copy. If you read the book do come back and discuss on this thread.

mcmooncup Thu 13-Jun-13 15:59:05

Brene Brown is a legend.

I recommend all her work to every single person on the earth ever.

I've seen the talks, read the books and am now regularly embracing my vulnerability.

Hissy Fri 14-Jun-13 00:12:14

I think reading this book would transform my life. I am vulnerable, don't want to be, but perhaps I do need to understand why I am so, and learn how it works and the power it has.

JaxTellerIsAllMine Fri 14-Jun-13 19:05:14

wow! There are certain things in my life that I NEED to change, so this would help me hugely; to understand myself better and more.

Fraxinus Sat 15-Jun-13 22:33:28

Wow, looks amazing. I'm going to link that talk on Facebook.

Robinredboobs Sun 16-Jun-13 00:55:10

Looking forward to reading this.

BetterDaze Sun 16-Jun-13 11:33:02

Would love to read this, being someone who has made a few key poor choices and as a result stopped allowing myself to be vulnerable. There is a need for balance and wisdom in how and when to be vulnerable and who with I guess.

SEWannabe Sun 16-Jun-13 11:36:00

I'd love this book. I have listened to her TED talks on shame and vulnerability and really enjoyed them.

mom2010 Sun 16-Jun-13 19:18:40

would love to read her after hearing all the raving recommendations...

mignonette Wed 26-Jun-13 12:32:08

Received my copy this morning and will start to read. Have had a quick skim and already note that Brown is citing some research that I became aware of - lyrics focused upon the self (I) as opposed to the collective (We). Also noted is the increase in aggressive words/phrases.

Back soon...

mignonette Wed 26-Jun-13 12:33:14

Anybody who would like my copy after I have read it (if you don't mind a few pencilled comments) feel free to PM me. I'll put names in a hat and send it to one of you.

tinypumpkin Wed 26-Jun-13 14:33:09

I got my book this morning too, thank you smile Will start reading asap.

Hissy Thu 27-Jun-13 19:01:29

I got mine yesterday. First few pages were Ping! Ping! Ping! I couldn't ready it last night due to sick boy, but i am very excited about the prospect of digging into it tonight!

Thank you!

tinypumpkin Fri 28-Jun-13 13:55:57

I have to say that I have managed to read this but have really struggled with it. I don't know why as the topic really speaks to me and is very relevant. I found that it spent a long time saying almost the same thing. I think I really didn't like the format of what I suppose could be classed as a 'self-help book' and that perhaps this is more the issue rather than the topic itself.

I did find myself skimming rather a lot as I was bored. I feel like it has been wasted on me (I so wanted to learn from it!) so if anyone wants to read it please let PM me and I will post it on. First some first served. Hope you don't mind me copying your idea Mignonette about sending the copy on.

A very shamed and vulnerable pumpkin smile

mignonette Fri 28-Jun-13 14:01:24

I don't mind Tiny. I too am finding it a little dumbed down. Will comment in more depth later but I'm pretty bored with it to be honest. It appears to be little more than a re-packaging of standard CBT and other techniques that I and many others have been using for years in our RL psychiatry/psychology settings.

I am a little surprised that it appears so magically new and Eureka-ish to the author....

Interesting research cited though. Will be reading some of those papers.

tinypumpkin Fri 28-Jun-13 19:47:41

Interesting that you have a psychology/psychiatry background Mignonette, I do too. I did also wonder if that was another reason that I didn't like it! I agree, nothing seemed that amazing to me either. I can be a harsh critic I think!

mignonette Fri 28-Jun-13 20:13:11

Tiny no, your judgement is spot on because our backgrounds mean nothing about this is new. It's repackaged bits and pieces from half a dozen psychological techniques supported by some sometimes interesting research that was not commissioned for this book and her interpretation/application thereof.

I also have this mental image of hundreds of excitable 'disciples' of hers rising to their feet and cheering after every paragraph and point is made. They are interrupting my concentration wink.

It has that revelatory 'aren't I clever for working this out' tone to it. I wanted to find a self help book that maybe I could recommend to clients but this book is not shaping up to be it.

Bumpstarter Mon 01-Jul-13 21:06:57

Oh, I am interested that it is not all rave reviews. I can't get into it. After seeing the ted talk, I just can't find the right place to start the book. My critical powers are not as deep as other posters. But it is not speaking to me. I will try again, promise.

thecatfromjapan Mon 01-Jul-13 22:56:30

i want to join the mignonette "Pass the book on" bandwagon! If anyone would like my copy, please e-mail me.

Interesting views so far. I'm half way in and I'm in two minds about the "style". Here's why:

It does read like a motivational talk/self-help book, and that does mean that it reads in (what might be called) a slightly "dumbed down" way. I kept on thinking: "It's OK! Trust me! Go into the research and secondary literature here a bit more! Get a bit heavier! I can take it!" And the (rather frequent) vignettes of people coming up to her, with tears in their eyes, weeping because she'd essentially saved their lives, was a bit too much for me.

But the author is clear that this is meant to be a version of her talks; this is a book written for a mass-market; this is meant to be a book about eschewing some of the aggressive and defensive armour that hides the vulnerability of power and status positions.

Sooooo ... it could be argued that: the book walks the talk it's talking; isn't it a bit sad that there is a cultural cringe (almost) when encountering a book aimed at a mass-market and in a demotic style?; can you have a book relaying interesting ideas that isn't written in academic language and still be accorded respect?

Personally, my jury is out on those questions so far.

I did like the basic ideas. I decided I would go and hunt down her more academic work.

i was ... interested ... in the absence of hard-hitting political analysis or gender analysis in a book dealing with shame and vulnerability in social situations. I've just reached the section where the author states that her early research was on women and shame and she is discussing the gender differences of shame. I am agog to discover if she will discuss gender and vulnerability.

I am interested in the fact that she suggests all this to be relevant owing to the economic downturn, and that she is arguing for a new ethics; a a new way of interacting. But, again, I wonder what will happen with the politics, the economics, and the gender issues.

I like the fact that she posits inter-relationality being a fundamental of human existence. I am perplexed that she doesn't tell her reader that this is debatable. A lot of people would disagree with that. And a lot of feminists have suggested that the debate between there being a model of a fundamentally autonomous subject versus a model of intersubjective being(s) is a gendered debate.

Has this been dropped for a mainstream audience? Why? Did she make a conscious decision that she was going to vigorously deny the gendered dimensions of all this? Is that an implicit statement of belief and position?

Nevertheless .... I ask these questions because I am interested. I am reading on because I am interested. I liked seeing in print a woman writing about how painful and difficult it is to advance ideas publicly in a society where it is "academic", "rigorous", and "scientific" to be critical, and to pull apart. (Again, I think there is a gender issue here ... but perhaps I am wrong??). Why not have a model where the default is to judge an idea by what we can do with it; where we can take it?

After I read that, I did feel rather "pulled up" as a reader. She introduced her "self" into the book, in a very un-academic, very personal way. She reminded me very abruptly of the person-who-writes behind every book. And it really did stop me, and make me wonder why we do pretend that books and ideas don't have a living, breathing, feeling person behind them. it made me a lot less inclined to be hurtful-critical. and i liked her for it - even though I know one is supposed to be more sophisticated than to "like" books the way one likes people.

These are ideas that have been advanced by others, but the author puts it together really well. And quite forcefully. It really is a great argument. Simple, familiar - but then very good ideas often are: they are often the restating of things we know. I also rather like the idea that she's taking her research out on the road and is trying to bring about a bit of a revolution in the way people interact/work/play.

Anyway, haven't finished the book yet - but just wanted to throw that into the ring.

clux73 Thu 04-Jul-13 11:56:20

I am really struggling with this. I am really interested in her ideas but I find the style of writing really off putting. For me there was too much of let's ask a question, answer it with a list of bullet points and then ask the same thing but worded differently. At some points it reminded me of Carrie Bradshaw's questions on SATC - not a good thing. I am halfway through and will finish it, albeit a bit reluctantly. I had hoped for something "new" but I don't think this is really breaking new ground. I think I struggle more with the style than the content though.

Like others have said, I am happy to pass this on if anyone would like it.

mindingalongtime Thu 04-Jul-13 16:09:13

catfromjapan would you like my copy of Until you are mine that was a free MN book giveaway?

Robinredboobs Sat 06-Jul-13 00:13:19

I didn't want to post anything until I'd read the whole book but... I read the first half in an evening meaning to pick up the next day. I've never read a self-help book before and found the points kept repeating themselves becoming a little dull. I did however find the case studies really interesting and some of the interviewees stories brought a tear to my eye - Brenee claims she interviewed hundreds of people during her research and I would have liked to read more about these people and their experiences within the context of the particular chapter. I found the chapter on shame the most interesting and relevant to me. I do agree with some other posters that perhaps lists and bullet points were overdone a little. I do intend to finish this book but in a way I'm sorry that I watched the Ted Talk before reading as it really is a good summary of the book and I felt like what I was reading I already knew.

shaktar Mon 08-Jul-13 12:51:26

I'm afraid I don't have much to add to that which has already been said - I'm really struggling to finish the book as finding it very repetitive.

I'm desperately persevering as want to believe that I still have the attention span, but found the TED piece covered everything in a much more dynamic and memorable way.

mignonette Mon 08-Jul-13 13:19:33

Have had to give up on the book. I had to fly to Germany last week as got news that my brothers newborn was seriously ill and expected to die. She is fighting back and looking better but haven't been able to finish it.

However my original thoughts still apply. I could find nothing new in what was said. It reads as a re hash of existing CBT/CAT principles and is far too cheerleadery for this dyed in the wool understated Brit smile..I agree that the simplest ideas are often what we already know and that the CAT/CBT slant may not be familiar to those who do not use the techniques professionally or who have used them themselves. However, I do not see much advancement within their application in her work.

But the author is clear that this is meant to be a version of her talks; this is a book written for a mass-market; this is meant to be a book about eschewing some of the aggressive and defensive armour that hides the vulnerability of power and status positions.

Sooooo ... it could be argued that: the book walks the talk it's talking; isn't it a bit sad that there is a cultural cringe (almost) when encountering a book aimed at a mass-market and in a demotic style?; can you have a book relaying interesting ideas that isn't written in academic language and still be accorded respect?


Very interesting point made above and I am going to have to think about what you posited. Am I reacting to the (possible) self aggrandisement or to the mass market self help style? Do I have a more negative response to female self aggrandising or to male because of my own internalised attitudes? How much of my own aversion is due to issues surrounding professional ownership of knowledge and therefore power and does my own profession mean I must own some of these attitudes?

For me as a RNMH I meet and work with a lot of shame and I see it evenly split between the sexes. It may have different reactions, not all gender specific but I see less of a divide there. The reason for the shame may differ and differentiating between guilt and shame is always useful as they can become very blurred. Also, is it the 'event' that causes the guilt, stress and shame or a person's inability to 'make sense' of it? I mean this in the sense of Antonovsky's own writings on how people make sense of trauma and stress.

Re academic rigour - trying to retain objectivity within debate and critique can be where us Humans struggle. What can replace it though? How do we establish 'truths'?

tinypumpkin Mon 08-Jul-13 21:36:37

Off topic Mignon, but I am sorry to hear that your niece is so poorly. Really hoping she keeps fighting.

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