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How has it all gone wrong?(2 Posts)
This is my first post. I am a father to a 4yr daughter and a 2yr son. I have been with my other half for 10 years but I'm starting to feel increasingly frustrated about our relationship. I work full time whilst mum takes care of the children on a day-to-day basis. My parter is a great mum but a lousy partner. My frustration stems from the fact I'm an exhausted dad! I am always up around the 4-30-5pm mark as the kids wake but my partner stays asleep (usually on the couch) night after night and rarely gets up to see to the kids to help me out. This happens daily! I don't talk to her in the mornings because she isn't a morning person and I go to work feeling miserable which has started to affect my work. My partner and I used to feel extremely happy, our sex life was good ( it's non existent now and we don't have any physical interaction which isn't right!) and we enjoyed each other's company, asked about each other's day. Since the kids came along our worlds have become more distant, not closer. I appreciated how mum doesn't work right now and she spends the day cleaning, looking after the kids, etc. I feel I am a good father ( I'm still learning so I get things wrong from time to time) but I feel taken for granted. When I come home from work I have to cook for myself or order in because my partner only cooks for herself and the kids. I don't get a hug from her and she usually leaves the bedtime routine to me. I don't mind but after a 10 hr day I need some me time too. I've found myself getting sad, angry and frustrated over the lack of love from my partner. Even though we don't sleep together now ( my partner blames my snoring or fact she is not an early bird) I feel lonely, desperate for acknowledgment. I am not happy with the situation or the fact my partner thinks nothing of going out most evenings to shop, see friends, etc and gets very annoyed if I plan to see my old friends on a weekend here and there. She thinks I'm being selfish. I spend most weekends with my children, playing, having fun but I am at a point of utter burn out. I have lost enthusiasm for life, I've let myself go and I can't see how life is going to improve. I need some advice??!!! Thank you all
My advice is to tell her you are unhappy and see what she says.
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