Career advice to a young black male

[purpledagger]

We've recently taken on a temp and he keeps talking about how ambitious he is and that he wants to progress in his career. He's not a brilliant performer, but I think if he focussed, he could probably do okay.

Performance aside, the bigger problem is that he just doesn't know how behave appropriately in a work environment and he'll never progress because of that.

Examples include - both verbal and written communications are littered with slang and wearing a hoodie (hood up) on a Skype call. To give you an idea, if Vicky Pollard and Ali G had a child, it would be him. We work in the public sector, so our office isn't highly corporate and we are very diverse, but this person is well outside of our tolerant norms.

I'm a black woman in her 40s who grew up locally to him, so I get it to a certain extent. The problem is that he had no self awareness as to how he comes across and this will hold him back.

He doesn't report to me, but we will be working on a project together soon. I just feel like I want to tell him why he's unlikely to progress.

What would you do?

[Rummikub]

Discuss professional behaviour with him. It’s not wrong what he’s going. It just has a time and place.

He sounds like he could do with someone taking him under their wing - a mentor.

[purpledagger]

His manager has picked up issues with him as they arose, but it doesn't really address the underlying issue.

[Letsgoforaskip]

I would maybe discuss having a chat with him with your manager first but I think it’s a great idea. Goodness knows, we all need a bit of mentoring at times.
I love your Ali G and Vicky Pollard analogy!

[Onceuponatime1818]

Could you be his mentor? Weekly check ins? Some encouragement; take him under your wings as such for a while.

[spotcheck]

Definitely discuss with him. It sounds like he needs a mentor.

[Ylvamoon]

He's young and new to the work place.
I think mentoring / guidance is the way forward.
Most of us wouldn't be where we are in our careers/ jobs if nobody would have taught us the basics.

[NurseButtercup]

I've witnessed this before and I had a similar reaction because it broke my heart a little bit to observe.

I definitely think you are doing the right thing, but tread carefully because he might not think he needs mentoring/guidance. I suggest you have an informal conversation with him first, to check to see if he is open to receiving the guidance & support. He might not want to hear anything from a woman (I've experienced this). Do you have any black or asian male colleagues willing to be mentor? In the absence of a black or asian male colleague, I would turn to a white male colleague if I could identify someone I trusted understood the nuances of the cultural differences.

I might be overthinking this and he may be happy to accept your offer to be his mentor.

Examples include - both verbal and written communications are littered with slang and wearing a hoodie (hood up) on a Skype call.
I'm curious, is he working from home when he's doing this?

[toffeebutterpopcorn]

Didn’t Barclays Bank make some videos about this? I’ll have a look.

[toffeebutterpopcorn]

barclayslifeskills.com/young-people/

[toffeebutterpopcorn]

barclayslifeskills.com/young-people/

[NurseButtercup]

[quote toffeebutterpopcorn]barclayslifeskills.com/young-people/[/quote]
This is a brilliant resource, I completely forgot about it. But, I think the young man @purpledagger is referring to needs help with the step before - business presentation, business communication skills etc...

I could be wrong I'll let @purpledagger respond.

[NurseButtercup]

This organisation could be helpful re mentoring

100bmol.org.uk/

[JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn]

It's such a tough one. I had a young male in my team who had similar traits. I took him aside and pointed out how a few changes in the way he presented himself would go a long way to help his career progression. He just said that if people didn't like him as he was, that was their problem not his. Definitely not open to mentoring!

[Denzelstowel]

Is he a recent school leaver or has he had other training?
I would suggest you mentoring him would be great for him and maybe your career and personal development too. You will have a better understanding of his background and can also be Frank with him where other colleagues can't so he will continue the same way and may never really leave some of these things behind. If he were my son and I obviously had not been able to prepare him for the grown up world of professional work I would be grateful that another sister / mother stepped in. Even the fact that you
Noticed enough to seek advice shows that you have the capability to do it - it's just a matter of work being in agreement so you get professional support or an agreement between the two of you if they won't support.

[purpledagger]

Thanks for all the great advice, lots of resources and things for me to think.

In terms of age, he is 23-25 and has worked in other organisations, so this isn't his first job. Maturity wise, I would say 18-19. I just don't think anyone has ever had a proper discussion with him about appropriate work behaviour. His manager is great and really cares, it's just that he is blissfully unaware of how he comes across and he needs more than what a line manager can offer him.

[Rummikub]

His manager saying this to him compared to a mentor or someone on his side is very different.
I liken it to playing a game. Mentoring tips are like a booster pack.

[MayIDestroyYou]

I do wish you'd managed to call him a young black man rather than ... 'male'. You made him sound under arrest. (On this board!)

My only suggestion would be to encourage him to read some/more novels. Any genre or time, doesn't matter - just the concentration on the flow of language will gradually re-mould his brain. (Though his age suggests he's post-university? Perhaps he didn't do much reading there?)

[Denzelstowel]

@purpledagger

Thanks for all the great advice, lots of resources and things for me to think.

In terms of age, he is 23-25 and has worked in other organisations, so this isn't his first job. Maturity wise, I would say 18-19. I just don't think anyone has ever had a proper discussion with him about appropriate work behaviour. His manager is great and really cares, it's just that he is blissfully unaware of how he comes across and he needs more than what a line manager can offer him.

I hope you try and I hope he is receptive that's all. He is not a school leaver so it is his environment - and if is still like this after working at different y places he may just take longer than others to pick things up work duties and social queues - And if nobody close to him has taken an interest in him to guide him and point him in the right direction it could go on forever, obviously he doesn't take on board that others in the office behave differently.

[NurseButtercup]

@JustGotToKeepOnKeepingOn

It's such a tough one. I had a young male in my team who had similar traits. I took him aside and pointed out how a few changes in the way he presented himself would go a long way to help his career progression. He just said that if people didn't like him as he was, that was their problem not his. Definitely not open to mentoring!

I experienced a similar response.

[MayIDestroyYou]

Hmm ... I wonder how many posts this thread would have if it had been titled 'Career advice for my darling son who's leaving Winchester.' ...

[NurseButtercup]

@purpledagger

I came across this - some words of wisdom you could add to your resources.

www.instagram.com/tv/COiScgmgSw7/?igshid=185uuks7yiuyc

If the link doesn't work please dm me.

[Rollercoaster1920]

Be very careful. I work in a civil service type organisation and having that sort of a chat could be seen as being against the diversity policy so you could be opening yourself up for a formal complaint.

BUT I fully agree with you.

Do you deal with international suppliers or stakeholders at all? I had to lose my regional accent and English slang when working abroad. That may be a useful angle.