Due September thread 10 - On the downhill slope...

[Kiwifruit]

Here's the new thread ladies - may it be as chatty as the last 9!!

[Kiwifruit]

On leave this week - it's bliss. Off to France on Wednesday with DH for the 'last fling' before all hell breaks loose in September. Can't wait .

Went and had my hair cut today - desperately needed a cut and a bit of grey coverage, but my hairdresser was in a grump and don't think he did a very good job (although DH says I always say that, and it's always fine the next day...).

Baby has been moving a lot more the last couple of days - movements have been quite obvious from the outside too.

Really do need to get organised with my shopping - so far have moses basket and some clothes. Time to go and do some damage on the credit card. Also need to start thinking about packing up the house to shift back to NZ in Nov. AAGGGHHH!!!

[milward]

To me is more like the stuggle to the top of a mountain!! - as big as an elephant (well nearly!), three kids to run after for the summer hols, various preg probs - can't wait for sept to be here.

[KiwiKate]

Hiya. I'm due on 13 Sept, so thought I'd join in.

You all sound so lively, unlike my unenergetic self. Afternoons are a real struggle to stay awake, and then night time is not too good for sleeping as this baby is really moving around roughly (this is a bit unexpected as DS1 moved a lot but in a more gentle fashion).

[LadyLazarus]

Hi KiwiKate, welcome to the thread! I am having lots of probs sleeping as well, if it's not constantly waking up to wee then it's due to hip pain or hubby snoring !!

I went to do a tour of the Maternity Unit at St Mary's yesterday, and while the rooms are pretty small I was quite happy with it all. The midwives seem really into 'active' birth, which is good, all rooms have dimmer switches on the lights and CD players (one of my major concerns !!) and a nice pool room. Feel better now I know what I'm in for! I can imagine more how it might go and what my options are and stuff, so was well worth the effort of going.

[LadyLazarus]

franch - sorry to hear about your SIL. That sounds like a pretty grim way to be told bad news. Hope they are coping ok.

[franch]

Thanks LadyL. SIL had a v bad night of pain and bleeding (still stuck in the ghastly hotel) but I think they'll try to do some travelling today and get the ferry tomorrow night.

I'm with you on the hip pain - I just cannot get comfortable at night. Still, DD slept through last night (she's got 4 new teeth on the way plus awful heat rash, poor thing) and is still asleep now at 9.15am so I can't complain

My major worry at the moment is, what on earth will DD do while I do all that breastfeeding? I spent HOURS on end b/fing DD in the early days - I never could bear to pull her off so on occasion she'd be on the breast for an hour or two - it was a good opportunity to sit down and rest, too, of course. But there's no way that'll work now!!! I'll hopefully be able to entertain DD a bit if feeds fall between her mealtimes, but I'm just trying to imagine for example getting up in the morning, b/fing #2, getting myself and both of them washed and dressed, getting DD's breakfast etc etc - it's going to take ALL DAY!!! My brain kind of shuts down when I try to imagine how it'll all work ...

[moschops]

am i missing out by not getting the tour of the labour ward? we were given a list of dates at antenatal which very helpfully has only the 20th of july left that hasn't passed.............and its fully booked. i know there aren't any more dates as i was SUPPOSED to be asked to sign up for the tour at my 20 week scan and wasn't

i'm tired and emotional.......i've come into work today because i cannot face another day at home with only the cat for company (as adorable as she is!) and its giving dp a chance to get on with some of the building work.

i'm starting to get apprehensive now about having a baby to look after........wondering if i'm going to cope with it all............

[jessysmummy]

Franch, so sorry to hear about your SIL. I'm sure that everyone will be relieved to have them home, though under sad circumstances.
I too am worrying about how to keep DD distracted when BFing #2. Think DD is the same age as your DD and is quite clingy at the moment with teeth, etc. I stayed at my mum's recently at the same time as my 6month old nephew and ended up with both him and DD on my knee at once - even though not much room there with bump. Thankfully will have a bit more room when #2 arrives but still not ideal balancing 2 on my knee! If anyone comes up with any crafty ideas on how to SAFELY distract a 20 month old for a couple of hours at a time, let me know!

[jessysmummy]

Moschops - couldn't you just turn up at the tour and if questioned just say that you definitely signed up for it? I'm sure that at least one person won't turn up for (sadly) one reason or another. Or phone the hospital and ask when the next tour that you can join is? They may have scheduled in aonther one if demand is high. Surely they can't just say all the tours are booked up...tough! I'm sure that this is just adding to your anxiety. Don't worry about coping. I know it's a cliche but having a child is the most natural thing in the world with no rights or wrongs - we all make it up as we go along and instinctively know what is right for our own child. And you're not on your own - You'll have DP and MWs and HVs and family and friends and of course US MNERS to talk things through with - no matter how silly it seems.

[milward]

bf number 2 or more - was ok for me. Once you can bf and move around then it makes everything much easier. You can bf & sort meals out with the other hand - I used to bf lots from my leftside so my right arm was free. Even managed potty training & bf. Can do make-up & dress whilst bf as well. I bf on demand so that I could get on with everything I had to & not be tied to a schedule. Also found that dds were happy to bf so that the older ones weren't really aware that I was having to be with another little one & their activities weren't interrupted. I' really think that I've no probs with jealousy because of this. The key really is mobility. Best wishes

[Kiwifruit]

Morning Ladies - welcome KiwiKate! Are you in NZ, or the UK? Or somewhere else??

Lady L & Franch - I'm with you on the hip pain. Have got one of those full length pillows, which has helped, but with me, bump, DH and the pillow in the bed, space is a bit tight to say the least, and it's a bit unbearable when it's hot.

Moschops - have been having exactly the same thoughts as you about looking after a tiny baby. In fact, yesterday I decided that I didn't really want one after all!!

Was just having a lurk on the August thread, one one of them has popped already - aaaggghhh!

[jessysmummy]

Milward - is there some kind of BF olympics that you could enter?

[milward]

jessysmum - well if you include bf whilst walking around ikea - then I'd enter. Potty training & bf was the greatest challenge though!!! But I'm really just into convenience & with 2 or more the least effort is best - with bf I didn't have to organise anything. Was almost a hassle to start on solids

[zubb]

franch - to distract ds1 while I fed ds2 I just made sure that he had snacks / books / toys etc near, and then if needed the TV went on.
How long did it take before your dd started feeding quicker - say 30 minutes rather than 2 hours?
For the first couple of weeks I'll have dh at home so he can distract ds1 & 2, then I plan on getting my Mum down for a week. MIL has also offered so I could have 4 weeks covered which will be great as then I hope to have some sort of routine up and running.
With 2 I used to b/f ds2 before ds1 got up (or get him to play if he woke up early), then get ds1 breakfast and get everyone dressed before it was time to b/f again. Ds1 will still have to be at pre-school by 9, so I'll have to get 3 of them (and me) fed and ready to be out the house by 8.40 - could be challenging!

[jessysmummy]

Milward - ikwym about bf being easy - no hassle of sterilising mixing and warming bottles. I would have much rather carried on bf if I hadn't had to go back to work. And look at all the fun (and mess) we have with solids!

[Kiwifruit]

Milward - one word - RESPECT! Do you run BFing classes???

[RedZuleika]

Sorry to hear about your sister-in-law, Franch. However - there is one positive aspect. Now she's had three miscarriages, she fulfills NHS criteria as a 'recurrent miscarrier' (a club I have the dubious joy of belonging to myself). If she hasn't already had investigations, now is the time to start harrassing the GP. You don't even need a referral to a consultant to have the blood tests for raised antiphospholipid antibodies, you just need to be a bit demanding (my experience is that the passage of time is measured very differently by the doctor...). It's a shame it's happened in an unpleasant hotel in France - although to be honest, my second probably wasn't any less depressing in Watford General. I'm sure she doesn't want to think about this immediately - but I felt that it helped to get back in the saddle (as it were) fairly quickly. Besides - a lot of the screening they want to do can only be done when you're not duffed.

My pelvis has been aching quite a bit too. Gives me the definite impression it's thinking of coming apart. I can't say I'm very apprehensive about looking after a baby, though - even though I have no experience at all of children. I think I just imagine it'll be like a puppy, but with less hair. And less tendency to crap in the middle of the dining room floor...

[jessysmummy]

Mmmmnn, RZ - you may be wrong about the dining room floor!

[RedZuleika]

Please - don't shatter my illusions...

[Boompi]

How awful about your SIL Franch. It must be hard for you too not feeling you can be openly cheerful about your imminent birth.
I was in Tescos on Fri and it seemed that every toddler/child in there was throwing a wobbly - lots of very stressed out looking mums. Thought 'OMG what have we done?!' Then yesterday evening saw a woman BF a tiny baby in the park and felt this overwhelming emotion - nearly cried! So guess mixed feelings are par for the course.
Not sure if people have heard about ICE? The Ambulance Service have launched a national "In case of Emergency (ICE)" campaign. The idea is that you store the word "ICE" in your mobile phone, and against it the number of the person you would want to be contacted. In an emergency situation ambulance and hospital staff will then be able to quickly find out who your next of kin are. I have often spent nights at work going through someones mobile trying to work out who to call if they cant tell me. Dont want to be alarmist but think it sounds sensible especially after Thurs. Would also help if lose phone!! Got this via our trust HQ so assume its not a hoax.

[andif]

Just posted on old thread by mistake. Can't believe how chatty we've all been this morning. Will copy here.

Franch, how horrible. Puts all my whingeing in perspective. Let's face it, the weather is beautiful (we'd be moaning more if it was pouring with rain everyday), we're all going to have beautiful babies within the next 3 months, and none of us were affected by the bombing.... Your post has really made me thank my lucky stars and get on with my day in a more positive way.

[andif]

Having said that.....now I've read everyone's posts about bfing I'm also worrying about making 2 packed lunches and getting out of the door by 8.35 with 2 (probably fighting) kids, a dog to walk and a pushchair..... Will have to do more the night before and get up earlier (currently managing to stretch it to 7.40am!) Oh well (back in positive mode..) what is the worst that can happen?...I end up dropping packed lunches off later in the morning, baby screams for a bit (never hurt anyone...!!) and the kids are a bit late for school. Not the end of the world!!
Just to reassure everyone that this PMA (positive mental attitude) will not last long, and normal service will resume shortly

[mummyhill]

Franch - Sorry to hear about you SIL must be heart breaking to be so far from home/family at a time like this.

Andif - Don't worry about packed lunches give in and send them school dinners occassionally to give yourself a break, we are good but we are not superwoman!!!!!

RZ - Wait till you get to the potty training stage, then eat your words regarding the dinning room floor

I have a JCB sitting redundant outside my house at the moment, they have turned up to start laying our new drive, have got half way through ripping up all the grass etc, sent the wagon off to the tip only to be told he now has a puncture so the work men are all sunbathing on my bit of dirt and have been for an hour now!!!!!!! If i wasn't for the fact that i am very uncomfy with my appearance i think i would join them!!!!! DD loves having a scoop in the garden though!!

[Boompi]

Gina Ford - what are opinions? Personally I think it sounds awful and sure to make me neurotic(recall you hated it Franch). I'm asking because a work colllegue has offered to lend me CLB - the book - which she swears by. Wonder if there are good bits you can use even if not into whole routine thing. DH doesnt even want it in the house as worried I will read it and take it all to heart! Should I borrow it or just look at The Baby Whisperer. Maybe should post this on another board as bound to be lots of opinions....

[franch]

Thanks for all the sympathy re. SIL. No more news since this morning. I wish there was more I could do.

milward, I take my hat off to you with all that mobile b/fing. I b/fd on demand for a short while with DD but found I was forever on edge, waiting for the next scream, which always seemed to come about 5 mins after the last feed, or basically at the most inopportune moments. Will probably try it again this time but suspect it'll drive me bonkers being constantly 'on call'. zubb, I can't remember when DD started doing shorter feeds - tbh I'm less worried about times when I can distract DD with toys, TV etc. than when she's due tea, bath or whatever - still, maybe I'll end up as an ambidextrous olympian like milward

I guess the answer is that we all just cope, somehow. I just remember some moments of utter desperation with DD in the early days where she'd be screaming endlessly at me and I'd be sobbing 'I've just FED you! I need to put you down for just one SECOND! What can you possibly WANT???', and don't want to get into that kind of state with DD around. Still, I will get quite a lot of support in the first few weeks.

So, moschops & KF, when I read of your concerns about how you'll cope and think 'Of course you will! We all do!', I suppose I need to say the same thing to myself ...