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Due April 2009: Episode 20 - Angst Ridden Fruity Fornication

(1023 Posts)
SmuttyNuttyTaff Fri 13-Mar-09 22:31:19

sorry couldnt help myself grin

on the last episode of april 2009 mums to be ..........

OddEyes & Babypringle are possibly going into labour Very Exciting!

Kaz & Skiingone - posted birth stories

lots of Fruity Smut, I was caught by the Fruit Fuzz and restrained grin

Lots more smut.......smutt...smutt

BB & WFH still havent popped (though we now have a birthing ticket system) We have to wait our turn wink

Boffin's AP causes more greif, beatings were handed out to a soundtrack

More commune talk

Morphine chasers with lots of soundtracks that take you back to the good ol' days

Springy & Suprise have gone to Brum for the weekend.

contractions/BH's/ movement/ailments aplenty

sorry if i have missed anything out ....

OP’s posts: |
BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 07:07:35

So I finished the thread but you just watch springy, puzzle or lulu come along and steal it from me angry!!!!

Good round up smutts

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 07:23:37

I have to say I have new sympathy for you SPD ladies! Last night was awful - have really bad lower back pain to the point that every time I turned over I literally cried out with pain, DH had to get up and get me out of bed every time I needed the toilet (which was ALOT) and I have been awake since 3am! hmm It feels like I need to crack my hips open or something and get someone to walk on my back until it all clicks into place!

DH is also suffering really badly with his dreams - he keeps dreaming of his dad but while on the one hand that is good, it also wakes him up and then his mind is working overtime so can't get back to sleep (and likes to wake me up for a chat!) Needless to say we are both a bit tired this morning and he has gone off to work now.

Anyway, am watching this babytime programme and there is a really nervous first time mum and the dad is literally taking over everything, wont let her feed it or change it because she is so nervous (I want to scream at the TV saying let her do it - you are making it worse!) and they just keep feeding the baby! every time it cries!

I have three hours to waste until my sister comes - and there isn't anything to do - I could possible do some work but I REALLY don't want to! Where are you all this morning...

Claireykitten Sat 14-Mar-09 08:05:25

Im here!

DS decided it was time to get up but he is in a gorgeous snuggly mood so far so I dont mind all that much!

Well done on finishing the thread altough like you say someone will probably cheat and take it from you coz they are like that!

I am with you on the pain. I was actually reasonably comfortable last night and then a sneeze snook up on me and as I didnt have time to brace myself or anything it pulled all my pelvis and crunched my pubic bone to the point that I screamed out and laid in bed crying (unfortunately it woke ds up as well so DH had to deal with him and get him settled again having just walked in from the pub!)

brettgirl2 Sat 14-Mar-09 08:21:54

Morning all!

Sounds like you had a great night BB - I know the pain that I had around 22-26 weeks made me seriously realise that Boffin and Nutty are extremely brave ladies.

Surprise number 3 - Where did you get the cot from? Company 'policy' if an item is damaged is not worth the paper it is written on, so them saying that you have to tell them within 24 hours of damage in transit is nonsense. On any of these things it says 'this does not affect your statutory rights'. These are set out under the Sale of Goods Act. pe=RESOURCES&itemId=1073792524&r.i=1073792522&r.l2=1074400662&r.s=sc

The actual position is that you have to return within a 'reasonable' time. If, for example you bought a cot when you were 6 months pg and went to assemble it when 8 months pg, that must be reasonable. If they refuse then you can go to trading standards to ask them for advice. BUT don't take any notice of some 24 hour nonsense, that is not a legal requirement. It is their responsibility to make sure that the thing is delivered in decent working order. You also don't need a receipt, only some proof that you bought it from them.

BoffinMum Sat 14-Mar-09 08:27:41

I am here too.

DS1 threw up all over the carpet this morning (he was off half of last week with diarrhoea). DH cleared up (he is excellent at wiping! Although he made some reference to having used the dustpan, which puzzled me!), but this means the DCs probably can't go to the Science Festival, which they absolutely love, and which is the high spot of their annual social calendar. sad

In the light of the AP hassle, we have properly costed up a nanny for September, which will cost £6500 more a year than a nursery place and an AP. This is starting to be really scary money now (even with childcare vouchers and so on), but I am hoping that somehow I get someone who is supportive rather than nerve-wracking. I think the fact that DH has a five hour daily commute and I (normally) have a three hour commute is a factor in all this - we get so knackered we need a higher level of support. And tbh I am now officially fed up of bringing up other people's teenage girls (especially if they are not even teenage any more).

BB so sorry to hear about your hip pain, this I would not wish on my worst enemy. Tough times for your DH, but dreams and chatting are a good way of processing it all. Same for Clairey, not a nice thing to happen, you would think nature would have designed us all a bit better.

BoffinMum Sat 14-Mar-09 08:31:38

Surprise, I would second what BrettGirl said about the cot - that was in the back of my mind as well (I am the returns and refunds queen if I say so myself, I even won a legal action against Ryanair once, which may have been my proudest moment). There is a 6-month return window for faulty goods without a receipt as long as you can prove in some way you bought it from them (eg bank statement).

BoffinMum Sat 14-Mar-09 08:34:53

Also Surprise, I am dying to know if the bicarb had any effect on the thrush at all, and whether you are going to try the acidic approach today as well/instead???

brettgirl2 Sat 14-Mar-09 08:39:37

My mum's fantastic at returns too - she just refuses to move until she gets her own way which is quite hilarious as there is nothing they can do!

You don't live in Solihull do you surprise? She'd take it back for you!

BoffinMum Sat 14-Mar-09 09:02:01

I think I may have learned my returns skills at my mum's knee, actually. grin She takes no prisoners.

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:03:32

Oooh Boff, that is a lot of money but I think it is the right decision if it makes you feel more comfortable in your own home!

How is DS now?

Clairey ouch for the sneezing! but yay for cuddly DS!!!

I am actually going out today and decided to put make up on (relatively little hassle apart from dropping the mascara brush down my top angry) but then tried to get my engagement rings on (BIG mistake), they both went on but then my fingers instantly became all sausage like and swollen - so just spent ages soaking my fingers trying to get the buggers off - not even going to attempt to take my wedding ring off!! I also dont have anything comfortable to wear! so have mushed together some sort of outfit that consists of a long-sleeved top covered by a smock dress and am currently assessing whether I can get away with my black sleeping trousers underneath or not??!! LO has gone really against tights at the moment and spends the entire day pushing them away (even though they are not tight in anyway!)

We have the worst luck with things and very very rarely do we actually buy something that isn't faulty when it comes to furniture and electrical etc so I am also quite good at returns - on the damaged in transit issue - if that was the case it would have damaged the box - you couldn't put a hole in the cot without damaging the outside first so you know that is not the case!

PuzzleRocks Sat 14-Mar-09 09:03:56

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat? I was up at 6 and I thought "shall I go and claim the thread. No, relax and lay in, plenty of time." BB i'm outraged!

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:08:58

hee hee although I am not holding my breath that it will actually stay mine!!!

Oddeyes how you feeling this morning?

PuzzleRocks Sat 14-Mar-09 09:09:49

Threads so far...

Due April 2009? Am I really the first?
Due April 2009 - Time to dance the light scantastic.....
Due April 2009 - Farewell nausea and all things ghastly, our boobs and bumps are growing vastly.
Due April 2009 - Saucy dreams, squirting boobs and spacehoppers. Whatever will the April mums get up to next?"
Due April 2009 - Festive bumps explode into crimbo, April mums wait in limbo
Due April 2009 - Tralalaboomdiay, our bumps grow every day!!
Due April 2009 - Sod the thread title, we will need a new one in a week.
Due April 2009 - April mums and bumps settle into virtual glam commune and wreak havoc upon the nhs
Due April 2009: Episode 9 - April Mums with Guns: Rise of the Fanjo Warriors?
Due April 2009 - Episode 10 - Fanjo Warriors demand Padded Purple rooms......Great Expectations!
Due April 2009 - Chapter 11 - Fanjo Warriors get moved to the top shelf. Explicit Content! Bottom Balm Required!
Due April 2009 - Episode 12 - Fanjo Warriors: Wedding Planners, Virtual Bumpmaids and Sexy DIY divas?
Due April 2009 - Episode 13 - Springy's getting married in the morning, Ding Dong the April mums will shine (or at least swell some more!!
Due April 2009 - Episode 14: Fanjo Warriors attempt to be "clean" during this thread?? NEVER GOING TO HAPPEN!!!
Due April 2009: Episode 15 - Barbarellys Babies Break free & BB waits paitiently (LOL not!!)
Due April 2009: Episode 16 - BB's magical cervix dust prevents birthing. But Barbarellys Babies are here !
Due April 2009: Episode 17 - We're off of work and ready to push, time for DH's to attend to that bush!!
Due April 2009: Episode 18 - Mumble gets married and we have triplets and twins here!!
Due April 2009: Episode 19 - We had sex in July!! The curse of the slummy mummy!!

Closing poster...

1 - FreshHell/LittleMy
2 - PuzzleRocks
3 - PuzzleRocks
4 - PuzzleRocks
5 - PuzzleRocks
6 - SpringySunshine
7 - BoffinMum
8 - Swaliswan
9 - PuzzleRocks
10 - Swaliswan
11 - SpringySunshine
12 - BoffinMum
13 - SpringySunshine
14 - SpringySunshine
15 - SpringySunshine
16 - PuzzleRocks
17 - SpringySunshine
18 - LuLuBai
19 - BabyBolat


BabyBolat 1
FreshHell/LittleMy 1
LuLuBai 1
BoffinMum 2
Swaliswan 2
P uzzleRocks 6
SpringySunshine 6

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:15:44

hee hee WFH and I are competing for babies and you and springy are competing for thread closes!!

How many threads do you think we will get through before the last of us has our babies? - we have probably about 6-7 weeks left??? I think we will be over 30....

BoffinMum Sat 14-Mar-09 09:24:37

Do you think it might be nice to have a little compilation of some of the high spots of the various threads as a kind of pg story, in a little booklet, as a souvenir? Or would this be too much work, editing it up and printing it off?

bronze Sat 14-Mar-09 09:25:51

Is anyone else (other than Kaz was I mean) booked in for a planned section?

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:27:32

Boff I was actually thinking about that yesterday - actually think if we took a thread or two each we could review, pick out the best bits and then compile them in one place and email round x

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:28:17

I don't think so - think Oddeyes was originally but not sure now.

bronze Sat 14-Mar-09 09:30:33

Just realised I have 7 weeks max left shock

bronze Sat 14-Mar-09 09:31:16

I dread to think what this compilation would involve

smutty fruit and pigs penii (what is the plural?)

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:32:14

I know - I have 4 max as they induce you after 2 weeks over - hmmmm...

purplemonkeydishwasher Sat 14-Mar-09 09:32:35


just cought up on the thread while I ate my cinnamon raisin porridge (which, as well as being delicious, has been working a treat in the poo department! TMI!)

had a good evening. DH came home and made dinner (and i had my first glass of wine in months! bliss), DS was in bed at a reasonable time and then i got some action! what more could a girl want! (well, taht galaxy bar that i scoffed earlier in the day would have been good...)

DH has taken DS to his mom;s place (as is the saturday morning ritual) so i have a few minutes to relax. pre-pregnancy i used to use this time to clean the house. ha ha ha. not now chuck!

no plans for today. DH will be watching hte football tomorrow (cup final) so i;d really really like to go out somewhere. trouble is that lately every time we attempt to go anywhere DS plays up and we end up back home within an hour.

Nutty - Loving the thread catch up! hope you cat comes home soon

Boffin - is there anything worse than vomit on the carpet?? DS did one on the carpetted stairs a few months back. YUCK. A. DO.

BB - re: rings. last time i had to give up wearing my rings as my fingers were HUGE. i ended up wearing a (big!) cheap band just so i still had something on my finger.

goig back to last were talking about music..nickelback are from a town outside of Calgary which is where I lived before i came to the UK. anyway, they used to play the Calgary clubs all the time and whenever they'd mention them on the radio DH and I used to make fun of their name and pretend they were a country band and call them Nickelback Junction. ...guess you had to be there.... blush

BabyBolat Sat 14-Mar-09 09:32:43

I think it would be very very funny!!!

bronze Sat 14-Mar-09 09:34:33

The baby list...
12 Feb: skiingone: MARIANNA, 4lb 4oz
20 Feb: Glaskham: RUBY MARIE, 4lb 3oz
04 Mar: Barbarella: ESTELLA, ROSANNA, OTIS
05 Mar: Kazkiss: ISABELLE FLORENCE 4lb 6oz & OLIVER THOMAS 3lb 7oz

Still yet to hatch...
29 Mar : WhatFreshHell, DS 2.4 born on Easter Sunday
30 Mar : BabyBolat: 1st timer
01 Apr : Rachelinscotland: DD 3 years, and DS 2 years in March
01 Apr : Juwesm: 1st timer
01 Apr : Chickenbalti: DS 4 years DD 17 months
02 Apr : BoffinMum: BOY! dd(21) ds(10) ds(7)
02 Apr : MathsMummy27: GIRL! DD 3 years
03 Apr : purlease: 1 m/c, 1 DD 3 years
03 Apr : Kalikaroo: SURPRISE! (28), 1st timer, lives in Scandinavia (but too shy to say where!)
04 Apr : Bleuravin
04 Apr : Bumpalump
04 Apr : babypringle: 1 DS 2yrs 1 month
06 Apr : ToastnHoney: first timer
06 Apr : Mummyontherun: DD 22 months
06 Apr : pintofstella: DS 5.7
08 Apr : LuLuBai: 1 DD born 02 Apr 07
09 Apr : Oddeyes (30): GIRL! DS 17 mths, 1 mc. London
09 Apr : Minush
10 Apr : hopeful1
10 Apr : mrsfossil: 1 DS 6.5
11 Apr : Bubbaluv: 1 DS 1yo
11 Apr : SpringySunshine: BOY! 1st timer.
12 Apr : Brettgirl, 1st timer
12 Apr : Mumblemumhome4lunch (37, Swindon): DS will be 4 on 11th April, DD 2yrs and 1month
13 Apr : Dungungirl(30): BOY! 1 m/c, DS 4 years
14 Apr : AuldAlliance: DS3.8 BOY!
14 Apr : Woody2shoes: Second DS
15 Apr : claireykitten: GIRL! DS 12 months
15 Apr : electra
15 Apr : Sarahmum: DS 10yrs
16 Apr : tristaleejac(25): 1 ds, 3 years
17 Apr : Surprisenumber3(32): DS1 9 DSS 9 DS2 5 GIRL!
18 Apr : gingersarah: 1st baby
18 Apr : Lauren61
18 Apr : salbysea: (28) 1st timer
19 Apr : Kittycatisgettingfat (29) 1st timer
21 Apr : B52s: DS will be 2 and a quarter
21 Apr : Staryeyed
21 Apr : Schulte
22 Apr : PuzzleRocks: DD 22mths GIRL!
22 Apr : soon2befamilyof4 DD 13 months.
23 Apr : FatandFedup DC3
24 Apr : conkertree (27): DS 17 months
24 Apr : Bronze (Gawain) - 4th DC
24 Apr : Frekkles
25 Apr : Swaliswan: DD 17 months
27 Apr : Bicnod
27 Apr : Carameli
27 Apr : ilovesummer 3rd dc
27 Apr : purplemonkeydishwasher DS 3yo
30 Apr : Nutty Taff (27) DD nearly 5 GIRL!

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