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NCT - preferable to to first or last due in a group?

(25 Posts)
HJ40 Tue 06-Feb-18 22:13:50

Just looking into NCT classes which I'd like to do as friends have found them helpful and DH could come too, although I know they aren't perfect.

The way my due date falls, I could effectively be the last due in one group or the first in another. I'm fully aware babies don't come on time, but struggling to choose between them, so just wondering what your experience was and what you'd suggest with the benefit of hindsight, pros and cons? Thank you.

OP’s posts: |
janeylacey Tue 06-Feb-18 22:26:44

I'm first in my group (DS born 12 weeks ago) and the last baby was born nearly 3 weeks ago. I actually don't think it matters at all if you're first or last, I'd say the important thing is how close together you are to everyone else.

I don't think I'd have gelled with the other women as well if I had DS ages before or after they has their DC. After me, the next baby was born 2 days later and then there was a 2 week gap before the next two.

otherdoor Tue 06-Feb-18 22:28:45

Personally I'd prefer last. I think then you have a better idea what to expect. I wouldn't enjoy the waiting phase right before giving birth but once the babies are here I think better to be slightly behind the others!

YouCantCallMeBetty Tue 06-Feb-18 22:35:56

We were the last in ours and it's quite nice. All the other mums fuss over my DD as she's the littlest and they like seeing her now their babies are 'big'. There's only about 6 weeks between first and last and tbh I don't think it really makes a big difference.

HJ40 Tue 06-Feb-18 22:48:14

Thank you all, there's nothing else to choose between the options so it's helpful to know your thoughts.

OP’s posts: |
pimlicolife Tue 06-Feb-18 22:55:13

Last is better!

HiggedyPiggedy Tue 06-Feb-18 23:02:13

Last. Then you won’t be the first to go back to work. And you won’t get caught up in baby development competitions because it doesn’t matter if your baby is the last to do everything because they are the youngest!

Foxsox Tue 06-Feb-18 23:12:44

We were last, only by a day, but by bring last you learn heaps from everyone else. There's 6 weeks between the first and last baby. That's a lot of time to get to know each other too.

Foxsox Tue 06-Feb-18 23:14:14

I agree with higgedy too.
I recall when weaning came around etc I was in no rush and walking/ crawling etc didn't feel like a competition as DD was the 'baby'

everybodylovesabosom Tue 06-Feb-18 23:14:20

I'm going against the grain and saying first is best. The ladies in my group hated waiting til last to have their baby. Their baby was often last to reach milestones such as crawling, walking etc too. Think about if that would bother you or if you'd rather learn from others' experiences.

SAMlady Tue 06-Feb-18 23:28:38

I was meant to be first, ended up third. I chose based on time of the class (8pm meant me and DH had time to eat out after work before each class!)

HJ40 Thu 08-Feb-18 18:42:00

Thanks for the further replies!

OP’s posts: |
HJ40 Thu 08-Feb-18 18:51:05

I've now looked into it in a bit more detail, I had previously checked I can make all of the class dates which I can, but in the detail actually the classes are more spread out than the titles suggest so now I really don't know what's best.

My EDD is 30th July.
Option 1 "early July to early August births" runs 30/4 - 28/5 basically through May
Option 2 "early August to early September" runs 3/6 - 1/7 I.e. June

I know technically I should be option 1, but given I'm due right at the end of July, option 1feels really bloomin early. Is that normal? I'd be finished the classes with two months to go. Or is it wise to do it early because of what you learn?

Sorry for more questions and not having looked into the detail in the first place. I do appreciate your answers.

OP’s posts: |
Marmite27 Thu 08-Feb-18 18:57:32

We were the first!

There’s a huge (nearly 3 and a half months) gap between the oldest and youngest due to mine being early and the last being overdue.

I never really thought about which would be better, it just was IYKWIM.

BikeRunSki Thu 08-Feb-18 19:00:45

Why don’t you ask the NCT course leader? They may actually be quite strict with the cut offs if there is a lot of demand.

In my group I was in the middle of group whose births went from the beginning of August to the end of September. We were spread out geographically and in due date due to low demand.

FellOutOfBed2wice Thu 08-Feb-18 19:03:08

I didn’t realise some groups had such large ranges. There are only two weeks between the very first and very last. We were second.

Rachie1986 Thu 08-Feb-18 19:06:38

We had 7 weeks between first and last in my group, but over 2 weeks between mine (1st) and the next. I found it really hard as the rest were all still pregnant and didn't have anything to share or advise.. we were always first with jabs etc.

I did have PND though which wouldn't have helped x

RicStar Thu 08-Feb-18 19:06:46

I was last - would have preferred to be in the middle - of your options I would go with first if possible. I found the others had bonded over cute babies / moved on a bit when my dd came. It didn't help our first was 3 weeks earlier and I was almost 2 weeks late so our spread ended up being large.

HiggedyPiggedy Thu 08-Feb-18 19:39:52

I would pick one and book soon because they do sell out

rebelrosie12 Thu 08-Feb-18 19:40:55

I was last and the wait was excruciating. I would never recommend being last. I'd rather be first.

HiggedyPiggedy Thu 08-Feb-18 19:41:06

I would go for option one. That’s the one that actually fits your dates

EyeDrops Thu 08-Feb-18 19:41:40

I'd say last. I hated the waiting, seeing all the rest be born and desperate for mine to come along - I was due in the middle but went two weeks over, sickening at the time - but once dd was born, I was so glad to have already heard everyone's issues and alarms and recommendations so I felt really prepared. I still feel a bit sad around birthdays (like by the time my dd's rolled around, the excitement has worn off), but, in those early days it was so much better!!

JassyRadlett Thu 08-Feb-18 19:45:38

Option 2 for sure - the chances are that some of you will go late, some on time, someone might need a planned c-section. With group 1 you’re more likely to have women with due dates in a cluster around yours.

I had the last due date of my NCT group, but DS1 was the third last born (and the fourth last was born 12 hours earlier!)

HJ40 Thu 08-Feb-18 21:06:00

Thank you all

OP’s posts: |
TheUbercornMum Tue 20-Mar-18 21:13:37

I'd prefer being first so I'd do August to September. Baby might not be on time and some may be earlier. Being last ime was horrible as everyone was out and about with their baby in my NCT group by the time I had mine and I felt they'd all sussed out groups and stuff before I'd even ventured out the hospital!

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