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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

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Get updates on how your baby develops, your body changes, and what you can expect during each week of your pregnancy by signing up to the Mumsnet Pregnancy Newsletters.

Birth clubs

early 2017 post-loss pregnancy thread

30 replies

wornoutboots · 26/07/2016 16:09

this thread is for those of us who've had a miscarriage or infant death and are now pregnant again.

anyone else out there?

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purpleviolet1 · 27/07/2016 12:40

Hi

I had two miscarriages this year - one at 12 weeks and another at 6 weeks. I'm terrified. Just got a BFP on Sunday so make myself around 4+3. What about you?

Celen · 27/07/2016 19:31

Hi Ladies, glad to have found you.

Been trying 2 years and during that time had 2 mcs (@5 wks) and an mmc (@11 wks, baby died around 8-9 wks) so feeling very very cautious...lines have got dark so a good starting off sign but I don't take anything for granted!

My due date is 2 April.

purpleviolet1 · 27/07/2016 19:40

I've only tested once and got a strong line on a FRER. Had bloods done and HCG level came back as 127. This was at 4 weeks 1 day.

How far are you?

Celen · 27/07/2016 21:10

I'm 4+3 I think.

How far are you wornoutboots?

FlipperSkipper · 28/07/2016 07:44

Hello. I'm 9+4 and have had two previous losses, a mmc which was also a suspected molar pregnancy in 2014 and a miscarriage in October last year that ended up a suspected ectopic due to my hormone levels not dropping, even though I knew I'd passed the sac, so I had to have regular blood tests for two months. I've also had two failed frozen embryo cycles, as all my pregnancies have been ivf. This pregnancy has been so hard, I've been lucky to have had tests done under the recurrent miscarriage clinic which also means they follow me up in early pregnancy. I've had two scans with them already and have a third today. If everything is well today I'll be discharged and get my booking in appointment.

wornoutboots · 28/07/2016 16:13

I'l be 6 weeks on friday.

the first part of this year was pretty traumatic, culminating with ambulance trip to hospital 2 months after I had a d&c for the MMC with blood pouring out of me, probably they entirely missed with that op because I had EVERYTHING caught in my trousers. 3 units of blood transfusion, 3 days of hospital (including my daughter's 1st birthday - so that's outed me to the people who know me waves)

I'm scared silly. Really is the last chance for me. too old to do it again, at the end of this pregnancy whenever it happens either I'm having a hysterectomy or my husband is having the snip.

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purpleviolet1 · 28/07/2016 18:57

I'm really scared too...just getting through each day and as long as bloods are reassuring and I have no spotting/cramps then I'll have an early scan at 7 weeks. Feels so far away at the moment!

wornoutboots · 28/07/2016 21:48

positive thinking, ladies... even if it's a pretense. "fake it until you make it"

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purpleviolet1 · 28/07/2016 21:50

Ooo I like that one. But mc are so heartbreaking I just want to try and protect myself from getting my hopes up this time..

wornoutboots · 29/07/2016 09:20

denial works too - "it's not real until I see a heartbeat"
got me through the pregnancy after a miscarriage last time

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purpleviolet1 · 29/07/2016 09:57

In one of my miscarriages I saw a heartbeat.. I'm going along with 'it's not real until a positive 12 week scan'

mrschn · 29/07/2016 12:11

Hello ladies
I had a mmc at 13 weeks earlier this year. I have now reached 13 weeks again today! 12 week scan all OK. Very relieved, but suffering physically, I have basically been in the first trimester of pg for the entire of 2016, so it's worn a bit thin(!) and I still have the awful first trimester symptoms going on.

Good luck to you all with your pgs.. Both of my past mc have been followed by healthy pgs. So stay positive!

wornoutboots · 29/07/2016 12:29

yes, purpleviolet I know a few that's happened to.

But all of mine have occured before I saw a heartbeat at the 12 week scan so that's what I use as my standard. I'm fairly sure we've all got our things we tell ourselves to hold the fear down.

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Celen · 08/08/2016 13:41

Hi ladies, sorry for not posting - been busy with DH at homework a week.

wornoutboots that sounds horrendous
I had an ERPC last Sept after an mmc at 11 weeks and they missed everything as well. I was lucky in that I didn't then spontaneously mc like you but as I was tracking my hpts, could still see I was pregnant. 5 weeks later I had another ERPC (this time with ultrasound) to ensure they got everything

Anyway. 6+1 today and feeling very tired and quite nauseous this morning. How's everyone else feeling?

wornoutboots · 08/08/2016 17:04

I had a negative test a week before the incident.

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Celen · 08/08/2016 18:03

How frightening for you Keeping my fingers tightly crossed everything goes well this time xx

I know early scans are good for reassurance for about 5 minutes (), is anyone having one?

Abacha · 08/08/2016 18:16

Can I join please. My son died last year when he was less than a week old . he stopped breathing in the hospital when he was just hours old. although he was resuscitated, he never recovered. The autopsy found nothing wrong so it was classed as SIDS

I'm trying to remain positive but I'm really terrified. I'm also not sure what to expect this time round. will the antenatal care be different? Baby will be due April 12th

Celen · 08/08/2016 18:29

Welcome Abacha, I'm on here and the April 2017 thread too. So so sorry about your loss, how utterly devastating for you.

I'd ask you what you called your little boy but understand if you'd be worried about being "outed".

Abacha · 08/08/2016 18:52

thanks Celen, I know I shouldn't care but I am scared of being outed. I'm paranoid though. I've lurked for 4 years before posting for the first time last week.

I don't have any symptoms at the moment and I'm kinda wishing I did, any tips on how to enjoy now? I would really hate to be so anxious the whole pregnancy

Celen · 08/08/2016 19:29

I wish I could Abacha, I really do. I guess as time passes I'm hoping to become a bit more relaxed but I fear miscarriage every single day.

I don't have many symptoms either, I know many women would be grateful to have an easy first trimester but it's hard for us who've experienced loss to enjoy a lack of feeling crap. We've just got to keep cheering each other on to the next day and the next day and the day after that xxx

wornoutboots · 08/08/2016 19:35

there's no reason it should happen again.

Now, how do we convince our brains to accept that and let us relax?

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wornoutboots · 08/08/2016 19:37

I haven't even seen a midwife yet, never mind an early scan.

It won't reassure me anyway, so what's the point?

my last pregnancy the baby died at 12 weeks gestation so early scan won't help me at all.

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Celen · 08/08/2016 19:39

I had my mmc at 11 weeks so I know how you feel wornoutboots - but Groupon were doing a deal on a local baby scan clinic so I thought what the hell

Abacha · 08/08/2016 20:40

I haven't seen midwife either. I have doctor's appointment on Wednesday as we have to be referred by doctor.

that's so true wornout very unlikely to happen again. why is the heart not listening?

wornoutboots · 09/08/2016 10:37

getting paranoid about ectopiic pregnancy now. It's like my brain goes looking or ways to make me scared.

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