Telling parents you're pregnant during Covid

(20 Posts)
kayl7 Sat 11-Apr-20 22:53:26

Hi all,

I’m not pregnant yet, still TTC, but wondered how people are announcing their pregnancies to their parents during quarantine? My dad has terminal cancer, so i’m aware that if we get fortunate enough to conceive soon, we might end up with the difficult decision whether to wait and tell them (for an unknown time!), or tell them on Skype which isn’t what was planned - they only live 30 minutes away...

Just curious what others have done.

Stay safe x

OP’s posts: |
wannabebump Mon 13-Apr-20 08:20:50

Hey OP. Sorry to hear about your Dad.

I'm 10+2 and my scan is next week so hopefully providing all is well, we'll be able to tell both sets of parents very soon. We have been "visiting" them both as we have been doing their shopping and delivering it (and leaving it on the door step) so getting to the house isn't a problem. My DH parents, he wants to just say we have news... and say it. It'll be a conversation at the door (probably when the next shop is dropped off!) - not ideal but id prefer them to now that wait even longer! For my parents, I think I'm going to get a little babygro or something and put it in a gift box and watch them open in - I'll like that more, and I'm sure they will too! Nothing overly fancy really but all due to the timing of it. No fb announcements etc either

Xx

stepmumwarwick91 Fri 17-Apr-20 00:20:45

Hi,

Sorry to hear about your dad, especially in these times.

I've just found out I'm 5 weeks pregnant, my first appointment is mid May with the midwife.
My parents have split up so it's pretty awkward for me and I know my dad isn't expecting it at all however, we've decided to do little boxes for both my mum and dad and drop them at the door and talk to them through the window on the phone. They live about 30 minutes away too.
It's a shame because it's first time grandparents for my parents and I would have loved to do this differently but you gotta do what you gotta do!

My partners parents have 8 grandchildren so over the phone for them isn't too bad and his mum has copd so we can't go and see them at all.

Good luck on getting pregnant, please don't give up especially during this difficult time! A little light in the darkness is what we all need right now 😊

HHill1 Fri 17-Apr-20 07:51:22

This is causing some debate in my house at the min too, I am 13 weeks now, had scan this week and all fine, I desperately want to tell my mum, but my husband wants to keep it secret until we can see everyone again. I'm at a loss as to what to do really.

So sorry to hear about your dad. Hope you're all keeping safe during this bizarre time!

HHill1 Fri 17-Apr-20 08:59:35

I should add I have suggested telling them from the end of the driveway but husband disagrees...

wannabebump Fri 17-Apr-20 10:15:02

@HHill1 if I genuinely thought it would be all over in three weeks I'd be inclined to wait till after but I don't think it will be - even if lockdown ends, there will still be some aspect of social distancing etc. I want to be able to share the excitement with family - and in truth, I think theyd be hurt if I announced it and I was potentially 5 months or so. Xx

HHill1 Fri 17-Apr-20 10:35:08

@wannabebump That's my worry too, I mean even at the end of this 3 weeks I'll be 16 weeks, I think if I don't tell my mum till then she'll be upset to have missed out on the excitement (it will be her first grandchild and she has wanted me and my husband to have a baby for at least 5 years now ha! Plus everyone needs a bit of good news at the min don't they!!) And not forgetting worst case scenario they could extend it further!!!

It's just so hard as my husband is so against telling anyone till we can actually spend time with them, I don't know if I'm being selfish by wanting to (but then the flip side is is he being selfish by not listening to my point of view)

I also don't really want to break the rules by going to her house but I could do shopping for her en route so then it's technically not breaking the rules is it (obviously we would only go as far as the end of the driveway) I think your idea of a baby grow is a beautiful one, I'm hoping to convince my husband with some love actually style boards to announce it that way... I think I'll make them and hope that he gets excited when he sees them done! (Manipulation at its finest I'm sure!!)

Hope you're keeping well @wannabebump thanks for replying!

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HHill1 Fri 17-Apr-20 10:35:56

Very new to this - no idea why that's all in bold 🙈

wannabebump Fri 17-Apr-20 11:44:31

@HHill1 I totally get you...my mum will be so happy, I don't wanna take that away from her too. Everyone needs too news just now for sure! I think my mum would be really sad if after all this was over, I turned up with a bump and said surprise!

We haven't told a single person - no best friends etc or work (no need just now!) and I'm bursting to say, so if all is well at our scan next week, it's absolutely happening! DH isn't fussy about how to tell his parents though, I think he'd be fine with Skype really 😂

We're only going to tell immediate family and our close circle of friends, which will be over whatsapp probably

Hope your keeping well xx

Lllot5 Fri 17-Apr-20 11:46:22

Just tell them. I don’t understand. Phone them up say ‘I’m pregnant’
What have I missed.

wannabebump Fri 17-Apr-20 12:11:04

@Lllot5 I'd just like it to be a bit more special - for us and them. Each to their own and all that.

HHill1 Fri 17-Apr-20 14:50:00

@Lllot5 oh my goodness, you're so right! Why didn't I think of that

🙄🙄🙄

HHill1 Fri 17-Apr-20 14:53:49

Yeah I think mine would be too. I think I've managed to get my husband to come round to the idea now, his mum is on the 12 week shielding list so we can't be in the same room as her till mid June anyway!! I think we will be telling them all over the weekend! So excited! Now to get creative in how we do it!! Exciting times!

wannabebump Sun 19-Apr-20 10:05:32

@HHill1 have fun revealing your news x

Serz88 Mon 20-Apr-20 14:34:37

If I was you I would make a big sign/banner and call them to the window

HHill1 Mon 20-Apr-20 15:18:57

We went for the boards and held them up at the end of the drive, so we had 5 boards...1st one said "we know we shouldn't really be here" 2nd one "but we wanted to see you smile" then "we are sad we can't come in for a cup of tea and a hug" then "but we had some news we couldn't wait any longer to share with you" and then on the last board "we're having a baby!"

(We dropped off food for my husbands shielding mum and then used our exercise to walk to my parents so technically no rules were broken)

It worked really well!! We set up a video and there reactions were incredible! So much nicer than telling them over the phone!!

Serz88 Mon 20-Apr-20 16:08:37

@HHill1 that sounds lovely! Congratulations

wannabebump Mon 20-Apr-20 16:21:44

@HHill1 that's brilliant! X

elldog6 Sat 19-Dec-20 08:42:42

We told all 4 parents over whatsapp video. Just called them up and said we've got some good news and they all knew immediately after saying that. They were all super thrilled and not being there in person didn't take that away from them.

Also a big bonus doing it remotely means no one comes and gives you a big hug or touches you! grin

BlueHairGirl Sun 17-Jan-21 21:14:22

It's just over a week until my scan and we're going to zoom our families to tell them. It's such a shame because we would have loved to tell them in person, but we're bursting to be able to tell everyone so for us it's not tempting to wait until whenever lockdown finishes.

I'm so sorry to hear about your dad, obviously you'd love to tell him in person if you can.

We've been reminding ourselves though that even without a pandemic lots of people don't share the news face to face. 2 years ago my sister just put her baby scan photo on our family WhatsApp to tell us!! And nobody was upset she hasn't told us in person

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