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Curious about attitudes

(12 Posts)
Kristajoy86 Fri 19-Apr-19 07:04:11

In a world where gender seems to be more of an issue despite us saying it should be no issue at all, I am curious as to why, despite people saying 'as long as the baby is healthy it doesn't matter' (and this really is the truth) they're so obsessed with knowing the gender of the baby?

With my first, we found out but kept DD a surprise for everyone else. Spent 20 weeks having friends, family AND strangers trying to trick or outright bully it out of us.

I am currently 17 weeks with No.2 so we don't know the flavour yet, and still EVERYONE is obsessed over it as if we're keeping it from them!

Curious to everyone else's experience with the baby-gender-obsessed world around them!

(I'm aware this is a pointless niggle but pregnancy anxiety does weird things!)

tiredmammas Wed 24-Apr-19 15:45:20

I found out I was pregnant at 2 weeks so I had a long wait and was obsessed with wanting to know what I was having. My pregnancy wasn't a good one and after obsessing I actually got to find out I was having a boy at 14 weeks through an amnio and then continued to have a scary pregnancy and scans every few weeks.
I feel it felt more personal and never really liked saying 'it moved' or 'I can't wait until it's here' but I can say confidently that when I fall pregnant again I will not be finding out as I really will mean 'aslong as it's healthy I'm not bothered'

Good luck!

Easterbunnyhashoppedoff Wed 24-Apr-19 15:48:49

tired are you a psychic? Most people have barely ovulated 2 weeks into a cycle!!

PCohle Wed 24-Apr-19 15:53:59

There's no other information besides gender it's possible to know about an unborn baby and people are trying to show a polite interest. I really doubt they are "obsessed".

stucknoue Wed 24-Apr-19 15:57:15

The sex and the weight are what everyone asks after birth. Beforehand I was asked if I knew, to which I said no (they couldn't tell!)

OnlyFoolsnMothers Wed 24-Apr-19 15:59:39

Very different experience for me- everyone around me was horrified that i dare find out before the birth!!!!!!

codenameduchess Wed 24-Apr-19 16:00:45

I didn't find out about it dd and everyone was adamant they just knew what I was having! The way I was 'carrying', swollen ankles, morning sickness, sweating, cravings- apparently everything pointed definitively to the sex.... even when she was born strangers would come up and ask if it's a boy or girl, I never got the obsession.

Pregnant again now and we will find out the sex this time, mostly because 4yo dd has asked for a sister so if it's a boy we'll need to prepare her. Maybe everyone knowing will stop the guesses and uninvited comments on how I've gained weight all over 😂

Constance1234 Wed 24-Apr-19 16:23:46

Is everyone really obsessed or just making conversation?

53rdWay Wed 24-Apr-19 16:27:05

Some people do get very weird about it. I once had someone I had never met before tell me again and again that “they can find out! Why haven’t you found out? You can get a private scan and find out! You still can!” when I was about 8 months pregnant already. Was a bit odd.

Then again OP you found out with your first, so presumably you can understand the urge behind wanting to know?

tiredmammas Wed 24-Apr-19 20:51:07

@Easterbunnyhashoppedoff haha I'm not most people pregnancy test said 2-3 weeks worked out my periods and the scans confirmed it

53rdWay Wed 24-Apr-19 21:26:56

“2-3 weeks” on a digital pregnancy test is 2-3 weeks since conception. So 4-5 weeks in standard pregnancy measuring since that goes from 2 weeks before.

jp237 Tue 07-May-19 00:38:22

Since telling people I'm pregnant I'd say that about 80% of the time people's first question has been do we know of it's a boy or a girl. This has really surprised me as it wouldn't cross my mind to ask this to someone. Not that there's anything wrong with it, just surprising. We didnt find out at the 20 week scan and don't want to know until the birth.

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