AIBU to not want my family announcing my pregnancy on Facebook?

(13 Posts)
woundedbutwalking Mon 02-Jan-17 18:17:51

Being pregnant has left me feeling a bit vulnerable & having had struggles with anxiety in the past, I've deactivated my Facebook account smile

My family all seem to assume I'll be straight back on there to announce my pregnancy, but I really don't feel any need to! Between me & DH we've agreed we would like to tell people face to face, but I have a feeling my family want to plaster it everywhere! AIBU to ask them (tell them in no uncertain terms) not to?!! I know it's their news too, but I want to be in charge of who finds out & when!!

OP’s posts: |
QuandryQueen Mon 02-Jan-17 18:19:38

Yanbu. I'd think long and hard about who you tell and when.

At least if your account is deactivated I assume you can't be tagged or have stuff posted to your wall.

If you aren't on there then I think for your own sanity you have to assume people won't talk about you on there - because you aren't on there.

QuandryQueen Mon 02-Jan-17 18:20:43

Oh and I'd make a hard and fast rule now that you don't want your dcs pictures put on Facebook at all - as you won't be doing it yourself then it's a perfectly reasonable request.

WatchfulOwl Mon 02-Jan-17 18:22:49

I think once you tell people, you lose control of who they are allowed to share it with.

A Facebook announcement about someone else's pregnancy is ott and would annoy me, but you're not even on there so who cares really.

HermioneWeasley Mon 02-Jan-17 18:26:06

"Think long and hard about who you tell and when"

It's a pregnancy, not a state secret.

YANBU to not want relatives to announce your news on your behalf, but it's hardly classified!

Congrats on your pregnancy. Enjoy it

MrsG30 Sun 15-Jan-17 22:18:40

Not unreasonable at all!

We're ttc #1 and when we (hopefully) get our BFP I don't even want to tell my mum until we're ready for the world to know as she can't hold her own water!

I echo another's comment, if you don't want pictures on social media, make a point of laying that rule down now!

Glitterbubble Tue 24-Jan-17 00:39:39


No BFP here but I feel exactly the same!! There will be nothing on Facebook from me and I'll be laying the law in regards to everyone else too. Had this convo with DH well in advance because MIL is surgically attached to the damn thing ...he agrees 100%


catx1606 Sun 29-Jan-17 12:47:56


You are perfectly within your rights to tell people not to mention the pregnancy or the birth on Facebook. Just be up front with now them saying that whilst you appreciate that they'll be exited about the birth, you won't be announcing on Facebook and you would appreciate it if they didn't as well. People should be able to respect you on that decision. Me and my DH agreed right from the start that we wouldn't be sharing the news on there (he's not on there at all) a few have grumbled about it but have accepted our decision.

user1468957349 Tue 14-Feb-17 21:24:27

Totally with you - I never put mine on FB and asked friends and family not to either. Not a secret but not something I want broadcasting to the world and his wife on social media either. To be fair, everyone has respected that x

anyname123 Tue 14-Feb-17 21:32:49

Set the rules now! My next door neighbour posted on FB that I'd gone into labour, and DP's nephews girlfriend announced the birth of my DD. Obviously I didn't care at the time, it was the last thing on my mind, but a few months on I'm quite pissed off, and will put a cunning plan in place for next time grin

baconsandwiches Wed 15-Feb-17 10:37:28

100% not unreasonable. It's your news to share, not theirs. We told our parents and close friends after our 12 week scan and are letting other people know as & when we see them, but if anything gets 'announced' on facebook it will be as and when we decide. Everyone totally respected our decision and I hope they do with you too x

JollyBobs Wed 15-Feb-17 10:50:26

We have a family member who needed to be told exactly what we wanted to happen on social media (i.e. Nothing!). It seemed astonishing to me as I'm pretty sure she's an adult and not a 15yo.

mumofthemonsters808 Wed 15-Feb-17 11:02:27

From past experience I've learnt the hard way that you will have to be very firm about what you want plastering all over fbook. It is your news, but people will try and jump on the bandwagon and overstep the mark.

We had a huge fallout in our family when a distant relative took it upon themselves to announce the newborns arrival before the parents did, que lots of comments, hundreds of likes, this was nothing to do with the person concerned and caused upset amongst other family members who had not yet been contacted.Some people seem to loose their mind when it comes to fbook and think they are some sort of PR spokesperson.

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