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When do you think its right to tell people.

(8 Posts)
mymagaret Mon 22-Apr-13 18:35:44

Help. I'm five weeks pregnant, this is my first baby and everything is so new, exciting, and scary!

I've been having stomach cramps and a bloated belly for the last week, which have begun to ease off, im hoping this is all the usual. I haven't seen a doctor yet. I haven't been to my doctor yet as i am in the Army, if i tell my doctor he will take me off all physical duties which will mean i will have to share my news earlier than i want to. But i worried some of the exercising can harm the baby. I know it is only tiny at the moment but throwing myself to the ground, or being exposed to cs gases in the gas chambers (which we have scheduled for a few weeks time) may hurt the baby. I am still physically fit and running and doing all the phys sessions with no problems, without anybody aware so far. Back to the point, i don't know if it is too early to share my news yet! I would like to tell my family first before work but would like to see a doctor before i tell my family, but he will inform work, so its a circle really. I feel it is too early to let people know, i know so many people who have had miscarriages and have already told so many people, i want to deal with this between me and my husband for now.

I know there may not be many Army personnel out there, but any help would be so great. My Husband is great but he's not the one responsible for our babys health right now and i feel so lonely in a field of men. Thankyou.

Munxx Mon 22-Apr-13 20:13:53

You'll need to do a risk assessment. I worked with chemicals and told my line manager ASAP. No one else need know but you really need to tell someone or you can't be protected.


Rosesforrosie Mon 22-Apr-13 20:17:34


Sorry but I think the responsible thing for you to do is go to the doctor. I know it's a pain that work will be informed/you will loose privacy. But what's the alternative really? A big risk to you and baby...

Rosesforrosie Mon 22-Apr-13 20:18:00

Lose ! Sorry

ChippingInLovesSpring Mon 22-Apr-13 20:20:03

Congratulations smile

How about going to a private doctor?

meditrina Mon 22-Apr-13 20:20:55

Try posting in 'Forces Sweethearts' as both serving personnel and their spouses/OHs tend to congregate there.

Yes, you do need to go to RMO and onto lighter duties.

This will be apparent to colleagues. Will they tell your family? Do the two things need to go together?

mymagaret Mon 22-Apr-13 20:52:56

Thanks for your comments. I think i know all along that was the right thing to do, they won't tell my family but i want them to be the first to know and not find out second hand via facebook or the like. Thanks again.

MissTweed Fri 10-May-13 04:45:29

I work in a lab and I knew as soon as I was pregnant that I had to tell my boss. I was not allowed to do certain things (due to chemicals) and my secret was out pretty much straight away (as soon as my first pregnancy bloods came through the door!!) but this is typical where I work) no one outside of work knew (including our parents) until after the 12w scan.

If really hope not the worst happens and there is a MC would you blame yourself and think that it could have been caused by something you had done work wise that you shouldn't??

Ultimately the health of your baby is soooo much more important than a few people knowing (who will soon know anyway!!)

I know loads of people that had open pregnancies in work but kept it secret outside until 12w.

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