When will it get easier?
My dad died in November 2007 and I still miss him so much.
In April 2007 he was diagnosed with cancer in the oesophagus but it was early stages so operable and the doctors all thought he stood a good chance. He was supposed to have 3 cycles of chemo before his operation. During the second cycle of chemo his body went into meltdown and he spent 10 weeks in hospital. At certain points we were told he was really ill but I didn't really take it in. My dad was a superhero, to me anyway. Well, he was eventually discharged so the consultant said that he should go ahead and have the operation. He did have it and it was succesful.............then he died of a heart attack 2 days' later.
I can't get over the fact that he took everything that was thrown at him and yet he still died. I got a phone call from the hospital to say he was ill and by the time I got there he had already gone.
It was strange how yellow he looked. It's not like the films is it? I had to phone my brothers who live abroad and tell them. That was horrendous. My mum moved in with us for a few weeks and then went home to her empty flat.
She has coped really well considering. She has started lots of hobbies and got a dog and although still misses him terribly, she seems okay.
However I had to be her support plus had 2 very small children so wasn't able to break down.
The other week my dd said that she doesn't remember him anymore. I knew that would happen as she was 3 at the time but I still found it heartbreaking. My dad was brilliant and I am so thankful that he was my dad.
I am so sad that my dc won't know him and although happy that he met them, sad that he doesn't know how wonderful and amazing they are.
I know some of you have lost children which is unbearable, and that he was 69 but he was still too young to die in my opinion.
It's my mum's 70th this year and for the first time she'll be older than him. I know it is hard for her.
I do feel stronger than I did when it happened but I miss him so much...........
Sorry, I know that this is a long thread but I know that some of you will understand what I am feeling.
Thanks for reading this.
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Bereavement
My Dad died over 2 years ago - I still miss him
27 replies
follygirl · 28/04/2010 21:20
OP posts:
rubyrubyruby ·
29/04/2010 22:36
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