(20 Posts)
Paris1 Wed 14-Apr-10 22:08:45

Lost our dear brother and the pain just doesnt go away need some major coping strategies - please help - this nightmare has totally changed so many peoples lives - I need to stay strong.

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AitchTwoZone Wed 14-Apr-10 22:09:32

my sympathies, paris. i hope you find the peace and help you're looking for.

2shoes Wed 14-Apr-10 22:09:55

no advice. but so sorry for you terrible loss

ShinyAndNew Wed 14-Apr-10 22:10:23

You don't need to stay strong honey. You need to grieve. Do you have anyone in rl you can lean on?

I'm sorry you are going through this.

Janestillhere Wed 14-Apr-10 22:13:27

Just wanted to say that it doesn't particularly get any easier (big help aren't I) it just feels DIFFERENT as the years go by.

I lost my brother in 1994 and when I talk of him now, I just feel sadness he is not here to be with us and talk with me now.

It is now that horrific RAW GRIEF when he first went.

Love to you and yours Paris1

Eat, sleep, talk of him. It does help. x

Janestillhere Wed 14-Apr-10 22:14:46

It is NOT that horrific RAW GRIEF I meant to say. Sorry.

Monty100 Wed 14-Apr-10 22:32:22

Paris - so sorry. I lost my younger bro 5 years ago. I grieve for him so, sometimes it hurts more than other times, you learn to live alongside it.

But as others have said, you do need to grieve.

Will be thinking of you.

Paris1 Mon 19-Apr-10 09:41:46

Thank you for you kindness - to share with other who understand my pain helps. Things will never be same xx

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shelleylou Mon 19-Apr-10 10:20:54

aww Paris. My heart goes out to you. You dont need to be strong i tried doing that for my brother and parents after my brother was killed 6 months ago (today) it only made things worse for me. Rest when you can, try to eat little and often. I know its so hard to but if you have to make a deal with someone you can have x if you eat or something like that. Be kind to yourself!!!

I'll be here for a while so will talk to you as much as you want. Would you like to talk about your brother??

caffeineaddict Mon 19-Apr-10 15:43:01

It is a nightmare, and my heart also goes out to you. x

Paris1 Sat 01-May-10 18:42:29

shelleylou I have attempted to contact you personally but am too stressed out at the mo to join - bear with me x

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Paris1 Sat 01-May-10 18:43:09

shelleylou I have attempted to contact you personally but am too stressed out at the mo to join - bear with me x Thank you to all who have replied and your kind thoughts x

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shelleylou Sat 01-May-10 22:29:07

You will have to sign up to CAT to contact me like that. There is a bereaved siblings thread on mumsnet which provides loads of support hich i am on too. I'll link it for you in a minute. You can contact me on shelley_lou@hotmail.co.uk

shelleylou Sat 01-May-10 22:32:15

[[http://www.mumsnet.com/Talk/bereavement/641812-For-Jonny-and-all-our-darling-departed-sisters-and- brothers bereaved sibliongs thread}}

How are you feeling now? I know its a silly question but i found people didnt ask me or if they did didnt really want the answer to it. Your in my thoughts was going to post today to see how you were. Let tears out whenever you feel like crying no one will blame you.

Paris1 Wed 12-May-10 14:00:20

Thanks for getting back to me shellylou have attempted to contact you personally - fingers crossed!

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Paris1 Thu 13-May-10 17:48:35

Sorry shellylou please ignore that last message didnt do it right am in the proceeds of trying to start a hotmail account and having a bad day - bear with me! How are you?

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shelleylou Tue 18-May-10 08:51:09

Hi Paris, I will check that email accoun in a few minutes. I've been in Corfu for the last week on my honeymoon. Was weird getting married and my db not being there physically. But he was there.

evansmummy Sat 22-May-10 20:22:15

Paris, so sorry for the death of your brother. I wonder how you are getting on? I'm over on the bereaved siblings thread too, and like shelleylou, would say you are welcome any time to 'pop in'. It's a great place of support for people who are going through the same thing.

As others have said, take little baby steps, one half day at a time ( I found I couldn't look further than that at the beginning), and be kind ot yourself. Do whatever your body tells you at any given moment. And don't amek yourself be strong. You are on very early days, and just need to let yourself grieve for the time being.

As I said, you're welcome to join us any time.

Paris1 Mon 24-May-10 10:21:07

Hi Shellylou - congratuations on your wedding - not feeling in a great place at the moment - take care bye for now.

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mamasmissionimpossible Mon 24-May-10 10:24:27

Paris, I am so sorry for the loss of your brother. I lost my brother over 10 years ago and it still hurts today. Some days are worse than others. Please take care and allow yourself to grieve in your own way.

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