My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Find bereavement help and support from other Mumsnetters.

Bereavement

Can you add an extra inscription to an existing gravestone

10 replies

Beanie4 · 13/11/2009 22:29

So sorry if this appears to be a stupid question. I would hate to enquire in person incase I fall apart. I would like a poem on the reverse of DDs headstone, Im not quite sure yet. As we walk to her little resting place, you see the back of her headstone and I would like to have something written there on the back. I dont know why but it is on my mind for a while now. Is it too late

Apologies also if I have put my question in the wrong place, I didnt know where else to put it

OP posts:
Report
thumbwitch · 14/11/2009 05:13

Beanie4, so for you.
You should be able to get another inscription done on a headstone so long as there is space for it (which of course there will be on the back).

Often headstones are engraved with one partner's name, with space left for the remaining partner to be added when they also pass away, so it is a common enough thing to have extra inscriptions added. I'm sure if you go back to the people who originally organised the headstone they will be able to organise it for you.

Bless you, what a sad thing but what a lovely idea.

Report
Beanie4 · 14/11/2009 09:45

Thank you so much thumbwitch of course, I didnt even think about when you have to add someones name on! Thats a relief, I'll just have to think of something nice now...

OP posts:
Report
Beanie4 · 14/11/2009 12:29

thank you so much thumbwitch. Of course! I knew there was an eliment of stupidity in my question.... duh. I just have to think of something nice now

OP posts:
Report
Beanie4 · 14/11/2009 12:31

oops here I go again, didnt think first reply went...

OP posts:
Report
thumbwitch · 14/11/2009 22:45

no worries, glad I was able to help

Report
Deemented · 15/11/2009 07:50

Of course you can, but bear in mind they - the monumental masons - will charge to take it off, engrave and replace. When my DH's name was added to my sons headstone they charged almost as much again as what the stone had cost in the first place - and they damaged the stone itself.

You need to make sure that before it gets taken off there are no chips ect on the edges - take photos if you can, as the machinery they use to take the stones off tends to sometimes chip the stone, and then when it goes back on inspect it really well and complain if there are any chips or cracks.

Sorry, don't mean to put you off or anything. Just wanted to share my experience.

Report
Beanie4 · 16/11/2009 10:20

Deemented - thanks for sharing your experience, you made a very good point. I just dont know now dont worry you havent put me off but I dont think Id like her little garden without the stone on a temporary basis just to satisfy my feelings of adding a poem on.

Stupid I know when people like yourself sadly have to do it, Im so sorry, I hope what Im saying is not upsetting you. I thought maybe they could chip away some words in situ, I am so dumb. I dont even know what to put on it yet so there is no pressure to rush into anything.

I suppose at the end of the day it comes down to me wanting to do something more for her and it might make me/ visitors feel better when they visit her reading some beautiful words that sum up the situation in a loving way, giving comfort

The front inscription should be enough shouldnt it? A Tiny Flower Lent not Given to Bud on earth and Bloom in Heaven

Thanks again all so much, I hope I havent said anything wrong I have the utmost sympathy, respect and understanding that this is a delicate subject x

OP posts:
Report
Deemented · 16/11/2009 15:05

Beanie4 - i think you hit the nail on the head, my love - you want to do something more for her. And it's not fair that you physically cant.

Have you seen the thread for bereaved parents above? You're more then welcome to join us on there sweetheart - no pressure though - whenever you're ready.

Report
Beanie4 · 16/11/2009 22:16

thank you so much for your kind understanding, you might see me there one day

OP posts:
Report
billStone · 28/05/2011 12:06

Hi there, I see this is an old thread but I figured my info could be as useful to anyone following it or the original poster. As a sculptor and letter cutter I can say that a traditionally trained monumental Mason or letter cutter could add lettering on in situ. This makes up a large part of a monumental masons work in fact. This avoids the need to remove the stone and risk damaging it. The guys that do it all by machine obviously have to take the stone to the machine. The only issue I can see would be if the original stone was machine cut the letters would be flat bottomed and shallow where as hand cut letters are v-shaped and deeper. I hope that is useful info to someone. If anyone needs further help or advice on this subject feel free to email me at [email protected]

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.