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My best friends mum died yesterday. How do I help her?

(5 Posts)
MyCatIsAMangyGit Fri 06-Nov-09 11:40:02

She's been my best friend since we were 12 (I'm nearly 40) and I knew her mum well, although we weren't close. My friend and her family are devastated. Her mum died after a short but very nasty illness and went down hill fast. She was bright as a button 6 wks ago.

I think that it is probably over the long term that I need to be there for my friend, although obviously I can and will support her now.

What shouldn't I do or say please? And, obviously, what should I do or say too?

I have to go out for a few hrs now but will be back this evening to see if anyone has any words of advise for me.

everlong Fri 06-Nov-09 12:10:59

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MyCatIsAMangyGit Fri 06-Nov-09 20:48:44

Thank you everlong. I spoke to her DH today and he has got the house tidy and cooked but can't do the ironing so I'm going to wrestle it from him and do some for them and the kids.

I thought it would be the coming months that would be the toughest for her when everyone has gone back to their lives and she has to carry on without her mum. She is the eldest child too, so her sister and brother (and dad) are currently looking to her for the support.

It is very sad and I'm not sure how I feel about it myself. I don't want to be upset so I can help her but have found myself quite tearful then overly cheerful today. Strange.

everlong Sat 07-Nov-09 00:59:11

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MyCatIsABiggerBastardThanYours Sat 07-Nov-09 08:06:24

Thank you everlong. Funeral next week I guess. A very sad one I should think.

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