i am so sorry for your loss. i know exactly how you feel - the most treasured person outside dh and kids died this feb. not a day goes by when idont talk or think about her. i asked her to watch over dh the other day. i miss her so flaming much it hurts.
Oh dear - how hard for you It won't always be this raw though and if it wasn't this particular aspect that kept hitting you - it would be something else. I know someone who doesn't use a room in their house very much at all anymore because their loved one would come in and see them there and talk to them and now they're gone and if the person I know sits there now they are just waiting and waiting for them to come in and they never can.
Can I ask what happened to your brother? I wonder if we might be able to think of a strategy to help? Do you want to tell us his name?