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Help to deal with miscarriage and the after effects

(3 Posts)
Noleeen Thu 23-Jul-09 15:13:36

Hi, i'm just looking for a bit of advice from others who have been in a similar situation.

I suffered from a missed miscarriage at 12wks this day last year and i am feeling very emotional about it. I would be guessing this is normal to feel like this and do others feel the same?

Also i decided against a private buriel (the catholic religion see this as being a living baby the minute there is a heartbeat detected) as i thought because i wasn't that far on there didn't seem to be much point so i just let the hospital do the buriel, however this is also something i deeply regret. However, i went to visit the wee grave again yesterday and found that others had left plagues etc on the wee grave with for example 'baby smith' and then a wee poem on it. I'm wondering would it be strange to do something like that because it was so early on or have you/would you do this?

I had suffered 3 m/c in total last year but m/c 1 and m/c 3 were at around 5wks and natural m/c, blighted ovumn. With the 2nd i had early scans and the heartbeat was detected at 7wks

I hope this makes sense and many thanks in advance for any answers i receive x

Doodle2u Thu 23-Jul-09 22:08:52

I don't think it would be a strange thing to do, Noleeen. I think it sounds like a rather lovely thing to do.

I'd probably plant a tree in my garden as well to be honest. Quite like the symbolic nature of planting a tree to celebrate a life, even a very short life.

I hope today hasn't been too emotional & upsetting.

Best wishes

Bleatblurt Fri 24-Jul-09 20:47:25

I miscarried at 14 weeks and I buried my baby. I don't think it's odd at all to do that though I'm aware others sometimes don't 'get' it, iykwim. But I did what felt right for us and you should too so if it helps you you should buy something for your LO. smile

I had already lost my DS2 so I buried the baby I m/c with him and we have a vase with a little message on it for him.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

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