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My Father In Law died today and I am so sad for my darling husband

(5 Posts)
BlueBumedFly Mon 22-Jun-09 19:51:47

My FIL died today after a long fight with lung cancer. DH and FIL never had what could be described as the closest relationship but since the diagnosis last October they became very close. DH has been away there (2 hours drive) for at least ever other weekend since), it is a small house so me a DD3 (2 years) have not gone as much as there is no room. SDD1 and SDD2 have gone with DH but I feel so bad not being there with him right now.

He was peaceful in the end but DH (having been there for 3 days straight nursing him) had gone to the shops. I think FIL knew though. He spoke to DH this morning and DH said he was popping out. The SIL went in to see him and said she would go downstairs and let him rest with MIL. He asked the time, nodded, held her hand and passed away quietly. I think he planned it this way, I don't think he wanted his children (albeit adults) there to witness his passing. It was just him and his wife, his life partner. He squeezed her hand, and simply stopped breathing. Very lovely in the end to go so peacefully after such a raging disease.

This year has been so hard. SDD1 had surgery for scoliosis and spent some time in Intentsive Care, now recouping but it is a slow process. SDD2 has been desinsitizing to peanuts which is wonderful and yet extremely stressful and now DFIL is gone. Worried about MIL too as she is poorly herself.

I am so sad to be here alone and not with them but I know I have to be here to hold the fort and care for DD3 and DH does understand.

I just want to hug him. sad

FabBakerGirlIsBack Mon 22-Jun-09 19:54:09

I am so sorry for you all. sad

BlueBumedFly Mon 22-Jun-09 20:00:10

Thank you, much appreciated. Just so sad.

tribpot Mon 22-Jun-09 20:04:51

What a terrible year you have had. So sorry for your loss but glad to know that FIL is at peace. It must be very hard to be apart from your DH at such a time, but grieving is a long process and you will be with him for nearly all of it.

Raising a glass to your FIL, and best wishes to your family.

BlueBumedFly Mon 22-Jun-09 20:07:05

Thank you Tribpot, might have a glass myself to toast him. xx

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