Moving on?... just musing to myself..

(3 Posts)
Deemented Mon 06-Apr-09 17:58:48

Went to see a friend today, and we were talking about our children, and i said that i'd never have anymore. She said that i shouldn't be so hasty, that i don't know what the futures got in store, and that as i'm only 31, i've plenty of time to meet someone else and maybe have more children.

It got me to thinking. Hubbs has only been gone for 8 months, and at the moment, i can't imagine wanting to ever be with anyone else. He was the love of my life, and i miss him so. But then, we had talked about what might happen should he die, and he always said he never wanted me to be on my own for too long, that he wanted me to be happy and get on with my life.

I guess what i'm wondering is... how will i know when it's right for me to move on? Is there a time limit? I know i'll love and miss hubbs for the rest of my life... but what if one day i do want to be with someone else?

OP’s posts: |
hmmSleep Mon 06-Apr-09 19:13:20

My fiance died suddenly 10 years ago, we had no children but at the time I really felt I would be on my own forever. I couldn't imagine loving anyone as much as I loved him.

3 years later I met someone. At first I admit I felt guilty for developing feelings for someone else, but then realised he would have wanted me to be happy. 10 years on I'm happily married to a wonderful man and we have 2 beautiful children together. I still love and think of my fiance everyday, but now it's more with fond memories rather than grief.

I hope in time you feel able to move on too. Your husband would want so much for you to be happy. As for a 'right time', you'll just know, you may feel a little guilt, saddness etc. like I did, but you'll know it's OK.

seriouscase Wed 08-Apr-09 20:32:46

I don't have any experience of this but I think Hmmsleep gave really good advice. I think your DH would want you to be happy and you will know when you are ready. I know my late friend, jealous as she was (!), would want her fiance to be happy. Best wishes to you.

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