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what do I say to her ?

(2 Posts)
Flocci Thu 24-Jul-08 21:00:38

Briefly ( ish ) family friend who is my godmother and dt's godmother aged 65.... her husband has just died. On and off he's been poorly for a couple of years and quality of life not been great but they made the best of it and she always said that she preferred to have him with her not 100% than to lose him. Despite ongoing health problems this has come totally out of the blue and she is in pieces.

I am trying to think what I am going to say to her when the initial shock wears off. The thing is they have been together about 45 years, no kids, they both retired early and just did absolutely everything together. Hardly any friends at all, and she has absolutely no family at all. He had some family living close by but she doens' really like them and I really suspect that in time their contact will fall away.

At the end of the day she is only 65 and fit and healthy and young at heart but she finds herself totally alone for the first time in her adult life and she hasa lready said that she feels so alone in the world with nothing and noone to think about and basically that is actually the truth.

I can tell her that I am here for her and so are my parents who still live near her but what do I say about the future which looks so totally bleak and empty now?

Any ideas please? It is such a tragic situation - she is such a lovely lady and they were so happy together and now her whole world has been shattered.

cathcat Thu 24-Jul-08 22:43:45

So sorry to hear your news. Probably best not to dwell on the future at the moment, that will be overwhelming. I would just concentrate on helping her deal with the present and then take each stage after that as it comes. She will be scared about what is in front of her but hopefully she has friends like you who will be there to help her.

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