My father just died

[Judy1234]

It's so sad but not unexpected. In a sense he died 2 years ago when the dementia was bad and he ceased to be able to communicate properly.

We're orphans now. He was 79 and our mother died at 75 only 3 years ago. That doesn't give us children a good life expectancy. The age your parents die is the best indicator of how long you will live.

He worked full time as a psychiatrist until he was 77.

[expatinscotland]

I'm so sorry, Xenia.

Even if it was a long time coming, that still doesn't make it any less painful.

Wishing you comfort during this time.

[ShinyPinkShoes]

Very sorry for your loss Xenia.

Take care of yourself x

[FromGirders]

Very sorry for your loss Xenia . It's always a shock at the end, even if you've been "expecting" it.
Thinking of you.

[WendyWeber]

Oh, Xenia, that is sad - he must have gone downhill very fast if he was still working until 77.

[Tinker]

Xenia, I'm so sorry.

[KatyMac]

Xenia - my condolences - Dementia is a cruel illness - how wonderful that he was able to work so long

I'm not sure you are right about life expectancy though my Mum's parents were 47 & 61 - and she is still here at 63 and planning to hang in a while longer

[LuckySalem]

Xenia - My thoughts are with you. I am so very sorry for your loss. I think parents and children must be the hardest people to lose.

[lilolilmanchester]

So sorry Xenia. My MIL had Alzheimers and vascular dementia, so I know in one sense it will probably be a relief for you. However, I know when MIL died, as well as relief DH and BIL grieved for all her suffering over the last few years as well as her death. Take care of yourself.

[gomez]

I am sorry Xenia.

A loss is never easy, no matter how much it is expected. Remember him before his illness and enjoy your memories of him and your mother.

[soapbox]

Xenia - I am so sorry about your father's death.

No matter how much it was expected or how much you feel he was already lost to you through his illness, it may still hit you hard. So do be kind to yourself!

[TheMadHouse]

Xenia - I am so sorry for your loss. I miss my father so much. He died 7 years ago suddenly. I am not sure that expecting it makes it any easier.

[mummylin2495]

sorry for your loss.

[orangehead]

Very sorry xenia

[wrinklytum]

Xenia- so sorry that your father has died.

Remember the good times.

Give yourself time and space to grieve.

Best wishes,Wrinkly x

[foxinsocks]

sorry to hear that Xenia.

How impressive that he worked that long!

[1dilemma]

very sorry Xenia

[SNoraWotzThat]

thoughts are with you and your family

[kokeshi]

Sorry for your loss Xenia.

[Judy1234]

I think he was going down hill before 77 when he retired, but he was determined to work until he died which sadly wasn't possible. I don't think I've really had a proper conversation with him for more than 2 years. It is much easier than say a child dying, I'm sure and we did get called up to see him in August as he was dying then but he pulled through. I'm glad he died at home in bed peacefully and not in pain.

[expatinscotland]

it's still rough, Xenia.

look after yourself!

don't be hard on yourself. he was still your dad.

[Bimblin]

Xenia - sending you best wishes and condolences - hope you're okay.

I don't expect to live long (medical issues) so I sympathise with the worry but try not to think about it too much, medicine has moved on a lot. Try not to worry. I'm sure he was v proud of you.

[wrinklytum]

Xenia,yes I think your last sentence is the sort of death we would all hope for.

It is very hard,the whole dementia thing,though.The person you knew is taken away in degrees by this horrid condition.

He sounds like he was a very interesting man