My partner killed himself today

(217 Posts)
ForgedInFire Fri 30-Jul-21 20:45:43

We have 3 young children. One is only a baby. My username is after his favourite TV show and he was so excited to watch a new episode just last night. How is this possible. I haven't told my kids yet and I don't know how I am going to

OP’s posts: |
Canyoureallymakemethin Fri 30-Jul-21 20:47:58

Im so very sorry for you're loss.

Someone will be along soon to offer more practical advice.

Nicecupofteaandacake Fri 30-Jul-21 20:48:17

Oh OP I'm so sorry to read this sad sending you huge hugs - I have no advice, but here for a handhold x

Cantchooseaname Fri 30-Jul-21 20:49:47

Ah crap. That sounds horrific.
Do you have someone with you?

Wantingtogetitright Fri 30-Jul-21 20:49:47

So so sorry flowers

Lougle Fri 30-Jul-21 20:49:51

I'm so sorry. Take your time. Do you have people with you?

Neondisco Fri 30-Jul-21 20:49:54

I'm so sorry. Do you have any support in real life? Just thinking about practical support with the kids and house.

Sending love x

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MerryMarigold Fri 30-Jul-21 20:49:54

How old are your kids, OP? It's anyone with you?

SheldonesqueTheBstard Fri 30-Jul-21 20:51:07

I am so sorry for your loss OP.

There are no words that will comfort you. There are no words that are adequate.

I don’t have children so I’m not sure how soon it should be addressed. But I would think it kinder to be gently truthful.

It must be so hard when you haven’t even had time to process it yourself.

Have you someone in real life that can sit with you? flowers

CagneyNYPD Fri 30-Jul-21 20:53:33

I'm so sorry @ForgedInFire. Do you have any one with you tonight?

AlmostSummer21 Fri 30-Jul-21 20:55:05

Oh my god, I'm SO sorry xx

Winstons Wish are very good in helping with how to tell kids & loads of other stuff. Sadly there are many MNers who will be able to give you advice from experience but sending you lots of love, strength & hand holding xx

clickychicky Fri 30-Jul-21 20:55:44

flowers is there anyone who can help with the children while you process it a bit?

ForgedInFire Fri 30-Jul-21 20:57:14

Yes I'm at my sisters and my family have all rallied around. The children are 6 and 4. Thank you for your kind words. It hasn't really sunk at all yet. I didnt see it coming. We were going on holiday on Monday

OP’s posts: |
Tobermory Fri 30-Jul-21 20:57:21

I’m so so sorry OP. flowers
Do you have someone with you?

GreatestSh0wUnicorn Fri 30-Jul-21 20:57:55

My friend had this recently with her ex and the father of her children. They told them he had died ‘because he’d been ill for a long time but hadn’t told anyone’. He’d been off work fir a year with depression but hadn’t told anyone.

ForgedInFire Fri 30-Jul-21 20:58:15

And the baby is 14 months so he wont understand at all but I know he will miss his dad because he adored him

OP’s posts: |
Raindancer411 Fri 30-Jul-21 20:59:41

I am so sorry, I have no advice but didn't want to read and run.

Libraryghost Fri 30-Jul-21 21:02:43

I am so very sorry. It’s going to take a while to sink in and process. Please make sure you are not on your own and you have support. X

Tickly Fri 30-Jul-21 21:03:17

I'm so sorry. I've lost a child and our eldest was 6 at the time . The best advice I was given is to be crystal clear he has died. No euphemisms about crossing over, going away etc etc because it can be hard for them to process how it is different to you eg going away to the shops. Children of that age can't think abstractly and may become fearful you will also "go away" or "depart".
There are some wonderful charities that give age specific advice - child bereavement UK and Winston's wish are both excellent.
For now for you just be kind to yourself. Focus on breathing and it is OK for the kids to see you are sad. They will be too (and also they may just be sad then start playing a new game - that is completely normal).

BonnesVacances Fri 30-Jul-21 21:05:22

I'm sorry OP. thanks

NeedToKnow101 Fri 30-Jul-21 21:12:10

I am so sorry OP; totally devastating ❤️

Beetlebum1981 Fri 30-Jul-21 21:12:24

I'm so sorry OP. I have no words of wisdom but there's a charity called Winstons Wish who offer support for children.
https://www.winstonswish.org

Look after yourself and take all the support you're offered thanks

Popsicle438 Fri 30-Jul-21 21:12:26

That's so terrible for you. I hope that one day you will find peace and happiness. flowers

Fortheloveofgodwhy Fri 30-Jul-21 21:13:08

I’m so sorry. Have no expectations on yourself. This must be a huge shock x

userxx Fri 30-Jul-21 21:13:25

Oh op, I'm so sorry. You must be in absolute shock.

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