Early MC in Oct so should have been due this week..

(7 Posts)
Hayls Mon 04-Jun-07 15:40:46

It's harder than I thought it would be. I think the thing that kept me positive when I thought about how I would cope with this week was the thought that I would be pregnant again by now and have another date to look forward to and feel positive about. That hasn't happened; in fact I have since MCd again (march). I feel OK but I know that at the back of my mind I'm not really iyswim. I talked to dh about it and he couldn't really help, says it happens to lots of women and we can move on from it...don't think it's the same for dads. I was only 6-7 weeks pg but that hasn't lessened it at all and nobody else has remembered. Dh said that there are lots of things that have happened to both of us that are painful and we don't register the dates of them because it doesn't help - I feel like I have coped with both of them really well (he disagrees)but it was this week I was dreading.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not a mess and am still positive but it is preying on my mind and as the due date gets closer and closer (Friday) I start thinking about it more.

Do you think that once I pass the date I can move on easier becasue there are no more 'significant' dates to overcome? PArt of me thinks that is why I haven't conceived again in that my body wanted to get through the 40 weeks it should have done...does that make sense?

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lissie Mon 04-Jun-07 15:43:57

im so sorry hayls. i think that 1st date is the hardest one, you will never forget but you can move on from it. men do see this differently. to him it was a bean, to you a baby. thinking of you. do something nice on friday tho. x

Hayls Mon 04-Jun-07 15:46:50

Thanks lissie, I know you're going through it as well atm. I've got to work on Friday but wil have dd with me so at least will be distracted

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dustystar Mon 04-Jun-07 15:49:07

We decided to get married as close to the due date as possible so that i would have something positive to look forward to. That definately helped as I was so busy on the due date i didn't really have time to be sad. I used to think about it on the anniversary of my miscarriage for few years after - even when i had other children- but it was ok. {{{hugs}}}

griffintribe Mon 04-Jun-07 21:07:28

I am in the same postion as you just 2 months behind.

M/c at 15 weeks and due start of august, i am hoping that i will be pregnant by then otherwise i dont know how i will cope.

Dh and i have already decided to mark the due date by taking our dd to the zoo or beach or somewhere. It feels right to spoil the child we have.

Best wishes for friday and remeber its natural to feel upset

ash6605 Tue 05-Jun-07 14:38:28

I'm so sorry for your loss hayls.
I'm sat here in tears as I read this thread as things are still raw for me too.I had my 2nd m/c in December at 13wks and would have been due a month from now.
I wish I could say I was ok but I'm not and I am dreading my due date,the anniversary of the m/c,and future birthday's.
I know deep down it does get easier as my first m/c was 4.5 years ago and the pain has eased with time but I just can't see the light at the end of the tunnel this time around.
I am thinking of you this week and keeping fingers crossed for you with ttc. xx

Hayls Wed 06-Jun-07 11:07:12

Ash, I'm so sorry to hear that. Knowing others are in the same boat does help because you know that they get through it iyswim. Hope you're OK, I'm doing fine for now- dh has gone away for 2 nights so I'm going to spend lots of time snuggled up with dd (might even let her watch Annie for 50th time!)
Thanks for all the helpful comments from everyone. x

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