Crying

[Timeforachange68]

I know everyone grieves differently but if you've lost a parent how long did it take for the other parent not to keep bursting into tears?

My dad still does this a lot when talking about my mum to the point where I don't like talking about here because he'll get upset - any advice?

[Timeforachange68]

About her obviously not here!

[poisonedbypen]

It took my dad about 3 months, but everyone will be different.

[ParkheadParadise]

Everyone is different when dealing with grief.
Did your mum pass away recently?
When my dd died I found people wouldn't talk about her because it would upset me. When actually it would upset me because they didn't talk about her.(They couldn't win)
It's probably better to cry than hold it in.

Sorry for your loss

[Timeforachange68]

My mum died in August & whilst I don't expect my dad to "get over it" (I don't think he ever will) I just wondered whether it was normal to still get upset on a regular basis, don't get me wrong I still cry often but it's usually over something specific & not just when I talk about my mum. I would like him to speak to someone about his grief but he will never do that

[Clankboing]

Does he cry with other people? You may be the one who he can talk to and cry with.

[Timeforachange68]

I'm not sure about that to be honest - he's cried at my sisters house too but she sees him less than I do! I think he has a weep with the hairdresser (I know that sounds odd but they've known each other for years & she is a widow so knows a bit what he's going through)

[echt]

Try not worry about this. Crying is fine. It doesn't actually mean they are upset in the conventional sense. I had weep twice at a New Year's Eve party, and all because someone asked me about how I was getting on (18 months) after DH died. No-one had asked for months.

[Redglitter]

My mum still has times when she cries. It's 8 years since my dad died. It's very very early days for your dad

[Timeforachange68]

Thank you echt sorry about your dh

And red I suppose it is - they were together forever & married for over 50 years so a few months is nothing in the grand scheme is it?

[guessmyusername]

It's a year yesterday that my mum died. My dad still frequently gets upset but he is fairly good at controlling it, but he broke down on me last sunday and set me off as well! They were married just short of 59 years so it is to be expected that he misses her.

[Timeforachange68]

guess I'm expecting all the anniversaries etc to be triggers, my mum's birthday is the next hurdle, not really sure whether we should mark it somehow or let it pass. Thanks for the reply