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My baby would have been due this time last year. Feeling so sad.

(3 Posts)
Babyblues052 Mon 04-Dec-17 17:08:20

So this time last year I found out I was pregnant with the beautiful baby currently sleeping arms. I am so thankful everyday for him.

But we lost a baby in April of last year. From scans ECT out due date was the 5th of December. I found out I was pregnant with my ds on the day my Angel would have been due.

I feel so emotional and very very sad because I lost my little Angel baby.

I had a miscarriage and I know if I didn't I wouldn't have my son but I can't help think of what could have been. My baby would have been 1, I keep thinking about whether they would have been a boy or girl, what they would have been like, what presents we would but for their birthday HOw excited they would have been. My dp has been amazing but it doesn't seem to affect him as much as it does me, for the past week I have cried every day (just a private 5 min cry as I don't want my ds to see me crying) it's so difficult.

I do have people in rl to talk to but they don't understand, it's like when it happened people were very sympathetic but they don't get it, the pain is unbearable sometimes.

I have so much to be thankful for, my beautiful little rainbow baby, my amazing dp, our beautiful home where we are spending our first christmas with our ds as a family. But I can't help grieving.

I don't know why I'm posting, maybe need to get it all down.

Humv Mon 04-Dec-17 20:37:34

I’m so sorry for your loss. You’re grieving because you love your Angel baby, it’s not something you can choose to not do. There’s no time limit with grief, so if you need to cry, please cry. Also, grieving doesn’t mean you aren’t grateful for all the good things in your life, in the same way that no number of good things in your life will make you love your Angel any less.

You’re doing so well and all you can do is take each day as it comes.

Wildestflower Tue 12-Dec-17 21:34:27

I'm sorry for your loss. I've had miscarriages too and understand that you are grieving and that sadness doesn't mean you can't also be happy with your living DC.

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