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Anyone else do some grieving while their loved one was still here

(3 Posts)
whatisforteamum Thu 05-Oct-17 07:57:09

My Dad died three weeks ago.I was expecting to struggle to Dad was a lovely man and I live near him and saw my parents regularly.
I suffer from anxiety and depression although I work it helps me with this.
I felt relieved when Dad died as he was so very I'll for the last two months and was choking on lung secretions the last 24 hrs of life as he had cancer everywhere.
Apart from tears when I walk to work and the day after the funeral I feel better than expected.
My dh who has lost both parents thinks it hasn't hit me yet....and I understand anticipatory grief doesn't prevent us grieving after our loved ones pass away.Any experience of this or will it hit me soon?
When my Nan who I loved dearly died 20 years ago I coped fine.I thought that. Was.because I had a baby to look after though.

PaintingByNumbers Thu 05-Oct-17 08:00:21

I think I had done a lot of my grieving already as well, cancer gives you time to say goodbye. My grief came and went, in waves, still, and still does, I just let it wash over me. Condolences on your loss and a big hug xxx

Awwlookatmybabyspider Fri 06-Oct-17 13:00:38

Yes I did. My lovely mum was so full of life. Always laughing. The type of person who would literally light up a room when she walked in. However her spirit died long before her body did.
My poor dad was always in pain with one thing and another, but thankfully he never lost his spirit. I guess he was the opposite to my mum. His body died before his spirit did.

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