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How can I support my friend

(10 Posts)
Minime85 Sun 01-Oct-17 19:51:32

A good friend lost her husband in a tragic accident last week. How can invest support her? I have text and tried to call but no reply as yet. I just want to help in any way I can. Thank you.

Ijustlovefood Sun 01-Oct-17 19:53:41

Just let her know you are there for her when she needs you but don't pester her.

ParkheadParadise Sun 01-Oct-17 19:59:16

She probably in shock right now and hasn't looked at your text yet. I think the best support you can give her is to be there AFTER the funeral, that's when I found it the hardest.

Minime85 Sun 01-Oct-17 20:05:26

Thank you for your replies. I intend to let her know I am here but don't want to get on her nerves, I figure dropping a text every couple of days to say I'm here thinking of her.

Alanna1 Sun 01-Oct-17 20:09:17

Can you drop some food round / arrange a food delivery? I used Abel and Cole once to send a special one-off delivery after a bereavement and they were so kind and helpful.

Cantthinkofanoriginalname1 Sun 01-Oct-17 20:22:35

Right now she's probably in shock and doesn't know which way to turn. If you mean it then let her know you are there for her anytime , to chat, help with paperwork , make any phone calls for her ,take her anywhere she needs to go etc. Yes to food baskets, nibbly bits that you know she loves as she probably doesn't have the energy to cook. If you're going to the shops , ask if she needs anything picking up. Does she read? Magazines and books are good for when she can't sleep. DVDs that she might like but nothing romantic , she doesn't need reminding what she has lost.
If you're going to be there then remember this is a long arduous journey - it doesn't magically get better after a year so don't expect her to be as she was.

OpalIridescence Sun 01-Oct-17 20:27:30

Sympathy cards meant alot more than texts to me (send the texts too, but the old fashioned taking time out to write a card felt comforting).
Yes be there in any way if you are a good friend, help with the practical detail and don't push or hurry her in any way.
After the funeral and when the world's normalises around her , is when , she will need her friend.

ParkheadParadise Sun 01-Oct-17 20:46:51

Sympathy cards meant alot more than texts to me

Agree, I've kept all my sympathy cards.

Minime85 Sun 01-Oct-17 20:55:53

Yeah I have the card to send . Thought maybe best to leave it a few days? She lives about 35 mins away. Going to look into the food deleiver idea, and I don't intend of not being there in the months to come. We have been friends for 12 years. I can't imagine what she must be going through. thank you all for your replies

Myheartbelongsto Tue 10-Oct-17 23:39:11

You're a lovely friend op.

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