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Husbands father

(7 Posts)
LavenderG Sun 26-Mar-17 22:16:29

My DH's father (step) died last year (sadly painful and drawn out). It coincided with our wedding. I really struggle with supporting him because he doesn't talk about how he feels... when we see the MIL I feel she is angry at me for stealing her son, maybe it's just me being sensitive as I am sure I'm the last person on her mind. It's been one of the hardest years of our life's, made worse by the fact it should have been one of the happiest following the wedding. I feel so much guilt for even writing that as it is no ones fault.
Does anyone have any advise on how to reach someone who is grieving but doesn't open up.
Thank you so much. I just want him to be happy a little bit more x

LavenderG Tue 28-Mar-17 11:38:59

I hope someone talks to me soon.. advise

fruitbats Tue 28-Mar-17 11:41:52

No real advice OP but bumping the thread.
I don't think anyone can be forced to open up if they are not that sort of person. Perhaps you could mention DH dad in everyday conversation just to encourage him to speak about him. I hope things better thanks

fruitbats Tue 28-Mar-17 11:43:19

And possibly mil feels angry at everyone as she is still grieving.

LavenderG Tue 28-Mar-17 20:57:30

Thank you fruitbats x

Rainbow1987 Tue 28-Mar-17 21:18:30

We lost my FIL 2 yrs ago and I still don't think DH has grieved properly for him. I recently got a photograph framed for him and put it in the living room, and we often talk about him (so do the DC) especially if we hear a funny joke or some of the pranks people pull (he was a wind up merchant with a wicked sense of humour). He's also started opening up more as our DS gets older because he's the spit of FIL. Just try and be patient, that's all you can do really. Xx

LavenderG Tue 28-Mar-17 22:04:39

Thanks rainbow.. I'm sorry to hear about your FIL. Lovely idea with the photo, I must do the same for DH.. I'll mention him sometimes and I am sometimes I sure as to whether DH wants to engage in it.. maybe more about timing I guess. Xx

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