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My partner

(3 Posts)
QueenofPentacles Wed 22-Feb-17 21:54:54

I have been getting over it, but recently found his daughter ( who was very very distant and uninvolved ) has taken his ashes to another country an dispersed them there. She had promised that we could have a ceremony together.
She is a very glamorous girl, high flying, jet set, but she never helped her father . He was very poor and in need toward the end. I did what I could.
I feel so sad that there is no place to put flowers for my dear man.
A mutual friend has been sticking up for DD, but I told her that it was utterly insensitive and it isn't just me, he had friends too who are shocked.
She used her father's ashes as an excuse for a road trip is ho it looks to me.

Jenice Wed 22-Feb-17 22:13:02

Try not to focus on what has happened as you can't change it now but focus on all the good times you had with your partner. Bitterness to a situation you can't change is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer.... Only you will suffer in the end.

As for somewhere to lay flowers... Try putting them in places that were special to you both or just visit these places and remember the special times. No one can take your memories away. There are many ways to honour a person's memory that don't require a grave to visit where that is not possible.

I really feel for you but hope this last deed by DD doesn't eat you as I am sure he would not have wanted that.

Poudrenez Mon 27-Feb-17 13:55:40

From what you've said OP, she got the ashes, but you have his heart. flowers

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