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Helping bereaved friend

(7 Posts)
Tweedledumb0 Wed 02-Nov-16 13:25:49

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ReluctantlyRedundant101 Wed 02-Nov-16 22:36:49

I find it helpful when people offer specific help such as "I'll do X for you on Y" rather than saying "I'm here if you need me" it means the onus is off the bereaved & they don't have to think about it too much

echt Thu 03-Nov-16 06:23:48

What Reluctantly said. It's the specificity that counts, and also keeping on in the face of some downturns.

You sound lovely. I'd be bold. Don't offer food, give it: soup is good, goes in the freezer for later. I had tons of soup given to me after DH died.

Tweedledumb0 Thu 03-Nov-16 06:39:44

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Tweedledumb0 Thu 03-Nov-16 06:41:27

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AnnaT45 Thu 03-Nov-16 06:43:00

Agree with the others. I lost my mum recently when heavily pregnant. I couldn't get my brain into gear when she was dying to ask for help. I had two amazing friends who would just text me and say 'we are picking up dd tomorrow to take her out.' They'd also just come over and do my washing up or run the hoover round. Another lovely friend took me for a massage and lunch. My aunt spent a whole day batch cooking for me. But you'll need to force yourself possibly but she will be grateful.

Also I found flowers a lovely gesture but a bit of a pain to look after. I know that sounds awful but I'd rather of had a lasagne or help like above, as it was just another thing to do.

You sound like a good friend, I hope she's ok. Friends and family support gets you through it.

Tweedledumb0 Thu 03-Nov-16 09:20:59

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