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It's my dad's funeral tomorrow

(26 Posts)
Katymac Thu 17-Mar-16 22:20:03

DD & I have new outfits (my mum has a new top)

The food is booked; loads more people coming than we expected

DD is singing (I am panicking) & her accompaniment is finally sorted

I'm stressing a bit sad

bibbitybobbityyhat Thu 17-Mar-16 22:22:19

Wishing you a peaceful day. Funerals can be bittersweet. Hope you give him a good send off.

neolara Thu 17-Mar-16 22:23:15

I'm sorry for your loss. I hope the day goes as well as it can.

bakeoffcake Thu 17-Mar-16 22:25:32

It's very natural to feel stressed. It's a horrible, horrible time, but you will get through it.

Support each other, and give each other lots of hugs tomorrow flowers.

Allalonenow Thu 17-Mar-16 22:27:01

I hope you have plenty of support to help get you through a difficult day. It's my Mum's anniversary this week so it's brought back memories of how hard and painful it was.
I'm sure it will be a comfort to you to have your lovely daughter with you.
All the best to you and your family. thanks

legotits Thu 17-Mar-16 22:28:48

Sorry for your loss flowers

Katymac Thu 17-Mar-16 22:31:33

Thanks - my cousin just got in touch this evening & he is heart-broken too

Poor DD is struggling

thatsn0tmyname Thu 17-Mar-16 22:32:31

I'm sorry your dad has died. Mine died two years ago. Lots of old friends and family came and their presence really helped carry us through the day. I hope the funeral goes well. X

FiveGoMadInDorset Thu 17-Mar-16 22:33:06

I hope it goes well for you all. It was my fathers birthday yesterday, he died In December, difficult day.

bibbitybobbityyhat Thu 17-Mar-16 22:37:19

Don't worry about your DD. She'll get over the loss of a grandparent.

TheUnexpectedMorrisDancer Thu 17-Mar-16 22:43:09

I'm trying to think of something to say, but I'm in tears thinking of my Dad who died less than a year ago.
So all I will say is be kind and gentle to yourself. In the days, weeks and months to come you will have good days and bad days, and you just need to get through them anyway you can.
I think it's wonderful that your daughter will be singing, you must be very proud. My Dad has 9 grandchildren and nearly all of them got up to talk about him. It was heartbreaking but made us all so proud.
I was very stressed about Dads funeral, really worried I would cry through my reading (which I did, but that was fine!), but honestly looking back now the whole day is just a blur.
I'll be thinking of you.

Katymac Thu 17-Mar-16 22:48:43

It was his birthday a week before he died.....he got a morphine pump for his birthday

He was the first one to believe DD could do it & he was proved right

Thank you for sharing your stories

bakeoffcake Thu 17-Mar-16 22:56:45

I went to a funeral on Monday. My best friend's DH died suddenly at 51. His sons helped to carry him in and they did a reading and read a poem.

There were a lot of tears but also a huge amount of love and support in the church.

You will get through it together, for your Dad.

PacificDogwod Thu 17-Mar-16 22:59:04

Katymac, I am so sorry to hear about your father having passed away. My sincere condolences thanks

You know your DD will do you (an him!) proud, I know you know that.
Wishing you love and strength to get through the day and for the future.

springscoming Thu 17-Mar-16 23:00:21

Would it help DD if there was someone standing near her who could join in or carry on the song if she can't continue? Just the idea of the support/Plan B might be enough. It's hard to sing through strong emotions like grief, especially if the notes are high. Everyone will understand, though. thanks

Katymac Thu 17-Mar-16 23:06:38

Our friend is playing - so if DD can't sing she will just play the tune; I do think people will join in if she falters as it's a sing everyone knows & my dad was in a choir!!

But DD says it's just a performance, an important one admittedly but just a performance

Thanks PacificDogwod

Tomorrow I need to find out if the crem has a piano (or I need to pack one wink)

ouryve Thu 17-Mar-16 23:07:13

It'll be fine. flowers

You'll blub a bit. A lot. Then you'll be relieved it's over and that you can finally concentrate on the what's next.

As an aside, I wasn't involved in picking the music or any of the arrangements for FIL's funeral earlier this month, but the final song was some Al Jolson. While the artist is far from PC, the song itself was so him and everyone laughed, as the curtains in the crematorium were closing. Just a perfect relief from the sadness.

Finola1step Thu 17-Mar-16 23:16:52

I hope tomorrow goes as well as planned and I'm really sorry for your loss flowers.

My Dad died nearly 3 years ago. I was knocked sideways and there have been difficult times. But, although I will never get over it, I have learnt to live with it. And its ok.

I more time pottering in the garden in the months after he died. Not that he was any good at gardening!

And today I realised that I have a PTA meeting booked on the evening of the anniversary. At the time he passed. I probably wont feel like going and last year I wouldn't have gone. But this year I will. Because Dad would approve of me doing something for the dc and their school mates.

I will be thinking of you tomorrow.

Katymac Fri 18-Mar-16 06:46:42


My brother wanted feelin' groovy (59th street bridge song( as we came out but my mum said no - it was so my dad's song!

Katymac Fri 18-Mar-16 22:57:42

It was amazing uplifting and positive

DD sang & it was amazing

I am exhausted

ImperialBlether Fri 18-Mar-16 23:04:08

flowers for you, Katymac. I'm going to go through the same after Easter and I'm dreading it.

AuditAngel Fri 18-Mar-16 23:58:37

I'm glad to hear your DD did well. I hope you feel some peace now. It is 14 months since my dad's funeral. He died the day after a cousin's funeral.

AuditAngel Sat 19-Mar-16 00:02:06

I read at my beloved FIL's funeral, he died on Easter Sunday 5 years ago. I was very anti social before the service to keep myself calm. I was determined to do this one last thing for him, as well as I could.

Good luck Imperial

PacificDogwod Sat 19-Mar-16 09:00:03

I'm glad it went as well as these things can go, KatyMac - look after yourself x.

ApplesinmyPocket Sat 19-Mar-16 09:45:29

Brave DD for singing, bless her. It was a lovely thing to do. Glad you waved him off in style. Love and flowers xx

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