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Not a relative.... exactly

(4 Posts)
mollyonthemove Sat 12-Sep-15 15:53:58

My mother's 'companion' has just died. They were together for around 12 years and lived next door to each other. Long story but he became ill and mum found it very difficult to cope and moved a couple of miles away. I know that sounds awful but it's a brief explanation and not as bad as it sounds. Anyway, she saw him as much as possible as did we but his health has been very poor for the past two years - not helped by him being alone and not, despite us trying very hard, getting proper help (not being family, we couldn't do much) anyway, he took a turn for the worse and mum and I went to see him at home a couple of weeks ago when he was quite jolly but confused. He went into hospital last weekend and mum spent an hour with him alone on Thursday, when he was unconscious but peaceful. He died this morning and I feel so sad. So sad that he had such a horrible past two years and the usual regrets that we really should have seen him more, done more, called him more etc. He was old, very old but I am really bereft. He and mum had some wonderful years and I am also worried about her. Sorry, just wanted to offload.

Mermaidhair Mon 14-Sep-15 00:33:44

The feelings of guilt and regret I think are normal after losing someone. I had them and still do after my dh passed. flowers for you and your dm.

whatdoIget Mon 14-Sep-15 01:16:05

How sad for you and your mum. Is it trite to say try and think of the good times they had? Sorry it probably is but may help? flowers

mollyonthemove Mon 14-Sep-15 09:43:37

Thank you. Not at all trite. They did have some wonderful years, and he was suffering, but I guess it's always so sad sad.

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