Hi everyone
My daughter Sophie died suddenly early December. She was 17months old. She was so perfect. We miss her so much. We have no other children.
I have a few questions for anyone who has been through this and might have any thoughts on any or all of these.
What I am most afraid of is seeing other children who Sophie played with. I've read that some of you surround yourselves with children (some are your own, I know). How do you do that? How do you interact with other children - particularly those the same age as your child - knowing yours will never grow up? Most of our friends don't have children so we can avoid it, but wonder whether it's best not to do this. Sophie's nursery are also planning to put a tree in the courtyard she played in. I'd like to go see this happen, but I worry I might... die seeing her friends all these months later. They will have changed and grown up and they'll be talking the way Sophie never will. How do I cope with this?
We've also organised for a tree to be planted and a bench with a little plaque in our local park. We haven't thought much about the practicalities of the day on which it will happen. My family keep referring to it as a 'ceremony'. I don't know whether I want a thing or whether it's best to just have people come and visit when they can at different times and to take them to the park at that time. Any thoughts?
Finally, we've booked to a see an experienced bereavement counsellor, because I'm willing to try anything. But I realise that day to day we are actually coping better than expected (weeks ago I didn't eat or get our of bed, now I eat a little and have gone back to work). We have so much support from friends and family and I'm able to talk to them and share my pain. We both have jobs we love, which we've (mostly) returned to. We have awesome friends. I have been exercising a lot and doing fun stuff like roller derby which has distracted me. My husband and I also talk a lot and very openly. So what will I gain from counselling? Has anyone been? I know it can't hurt, so I'm willing to give it a try. But if anyone has any thoughts do let me know.
Thanks in advance
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My baby girl died: questions for those who have been through this...
13 replies
anais2403 · 21/01/2015 16:33
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Messygirl ·
21/01/2015 20:39
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Messygirl ·
21/01/2015 20:40
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