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Memorial ideas for Mum and Dad

(5 Posts)
Fourpetsandcounting Thu 06-Nov-14 15:35:11

My dear Mum died last month. We've had the funeral. She died suddenly and I didn't know what she wanted but she'd had my Dad cremated years before and still had his ashes so she was cremated too and now we have both their ashes and haven't decided what to do with them. I was thinking of having their ashes interred together with their wedding ring in our local cemetery so that we could visit at special times or just low times. But, I've discovered this is really expensive and the whole process seems to be more about keeping the local authority happy than it does about creating a lasting, loving memorial to my parents. I've been quoted around £1,000 for a basic headstone and around £400 for cemetery fees. I was wondering if there was another way that we could do something in their memory - something like a bench with a plaque? Does anyone have any other ideas.

magimedi Thu 06-Nov-14 15:38:48

I live close to the sea & along the prom there are lots of benches with peoples' names on them. I always look to see whose bench I am sitting on. On, what I presume to be birthdays etc, there is often a bunch of flowers tied to the back of the bench. I think it's a lovely way to remember someone.

eatyourveg Thu 06-Nov-14 15:48:46

Could you plant a tree? When dn was born I contacted the woodland trust and they planted a tree for him and he had a certificate to tell him where it was. Swanage pier has memorial plaques all along it. I'm sure other piers so the same - that might be something to consider if your parents were fond of the sea. When I was a teenager I used to love sitting on Dolly Wilde's bench at the back of Winchester cathedral, no idea who she was but I found it very comforting - as if she had been my granny.

AugustRose Thu 06-Nov-14 15:54:29

Sorry for the loss of your parents flowers, it's lovely that you want to do something for them together. I always like the idea of woodland planting, you choose the wood and you choose the tree, you can have a plaque too if you want.

We bought a rosebush for our baby and his ashes are with his grandad's underneath - as we rent our home they are in a v large pot so we could take them with us if we moved, but I like the idea of them being close by which is why we didn't want a burial.

Whatever you choose it will be with love.

Fourpetsandcounting Thu 06-Nov-14 19:07:45

Thank you all. We don't live near the sea but my Dad was in the navy and they both loved the sea so maybe that's something to think about. I'd like to do something that's fitting for them. I'd been really upset this morning but feel happier now knowing that there's a choice and we don't have to be shoe-horned into something just because of our budget. thanks

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