My Mum passed away yesterday morning.She'd been ill for a little while but this has caught me completely by surprise.
My parents have 3 children myself and my two brothers(although I only count one as my brother)I'm the youngest,my brothers are 13 and 15 years older than me.
The oldest brother did something unforgivable to myself and my husband a couple of years ago and so did his children(they're all adults not children)none of them have ever said sorry for what they've done they've just added insult to injury.My mother and father knew what they'd done and my parents didn't have anything to do with them for a while afterwards.
I'm trying to deal with my own grief,support my own 5 DC to deal with they're grief,make sure my husband is okay(my Mum and Dad always called him they're son they've always adored him)they were very close,trying to support my ill elderly father,deal with my own health problems and those of two of the children(I'm seriously ill and disabled now and have two children that are disabled)and my health has been a lot worse the past few weeks but I dare go to the Dr's as I know I'll end up back in hospital.
All the while the oldest brother has been slating me to one of my aunties(that I was very close to before)my Mum's sister in law and she has gone of on one at my husband insisting we had done nothing for my mum and dad.
We were at the hospital every day with my Mum,we looked after the house and my Dad and they're dog.We'd been doing things for my Mum and Dad since last September which was before my Mum first became ill.
Now it's time to organize the funeral and I'm not being allowed to be involved at all!My Father has dementia and my oldest so called brother plays on this.So if he tells my Dad I won't help or that I haven't been seeing my Mum and helping them both my Dad believes him because he can't remember anything!What am I supposed to do??
My other brother won't stand up to our oldest brother so I am all alone in this.
I don't want to go to my own mother's funeral because of all the bad feeling my brother and his family have caused and continue to cause.I know they will start at the funeral and I just can't handle that.
Yet I was the closest one to my Mum,she told me things she never told anyone else not even my Dad.She used to tell me I was never only her daughter but also her best friend.
Only one day in and I already feel like I can't go on.
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Bereavement
My mum's just died and I am completely lost
8 replies
Soditall · 21/04/2014 20:13
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