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First baby miscarriage

(18 Posts)
Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 11:54:05

I'm 29 and I found out I was pregnant on valentines day???? had a few bad pains so they sent me for scans to make sure it wasn't ectopic! It wasn't thank goodness! But it showed a empty sac ?? but they said it could just be because I'm too early too show! They did blood tests to check my hcg levels which didn't rise as much as they should and they told me " they were so sorry and to expect to bleed!!" But nothing happened so they arranged for another scan and I was prepared for the worst... Then the last said " and these the baby and the heartbeat" and I burst into tears so happy, they even apologised for putting me through the stress that something might of been wrong. But then 4 days later started to bleed and then miscarried 6 days after seeing the heartbeat!!!?????? I was sad, angry, confused and I feel like no one understand so if anybody can contact me I'd love a friend who knows what this feels like and can help me.
[Message edited by MNHQ to remove personal info]
Thank you

cookielove Sun 13-Apr-14 11:57:29

I think you need to take your number and personal email off this post, report the post an they will do it for you. If people want to contact you privately then they can do via private messaging.

Sorry to hear of your loss! I had a mmc last year and it is such a terrible thing to go through.

polkadotdelight Sun 13-Apr-14 11:58:15

Hi Bek, I was in a very similar situation to you last year. I was wrongly told that there was heartbeat on a private reassurance scan but at the EPU next day there was but I miscarried 3 weeks later. The miscarriage board is full of ladies who are bereaved and if you go over there you will get lots of support. Look after yourself, it's awful but you will be ok.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 11:59:26

Thank u so much for your reply it means a lot x

EhricLovesTheBhrothers Sun 13-Apr-14 12:01:13

I'm very sorry for your loss, it happened to me. However it's really not on to post your email and mobile number and invite people to contact you directly. It suggests either you have an odd hidden agenda or that you are utterly naive about Internet safety.

polkadotdelight Sun 13-Apr-14 12:01:45

Ive just re-read my post - i was told no heartbeat at private scan. It probably would be worth asking for your personal details to be removed from your post.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 12:04:43

I most certainly do not have a odd hiden agenda! I didn't mean it to come across like that I have reported it to mums net so they should take my email etc off for me.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 12:06:26

I even saw my baby's heartbeat on the monitor so god know what happened. I a so sorry for your loss. How far along were you if you don't mind me asking? I was 8 weeks when it happened to me.
I have reported to mums net to take my number and email off now

EhricLovesTheBhrothers Sun 13-Apr-14 12:09:12

I'm sure you didn't, but that leaves you just being naive. It's never wise to invite strangers on the Internet to phone you on your mobile number.
Mumsnet is fantastic for support in things like this, use it as it's meant to be used and you will find it very comforting.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 12:11:00

Well thank you for helping me and I do appreciate you looking out for me so I don't get unwanted phone calls. I guess I was stupid really.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 12:12:57

Me and my husband want to try again but we don't know how long to wait etc is it just a case of when we feel ready?

AlpacaYourThings Sun 13-Apr-14 12:23:49

Bek, your situation sounds nearly identical to mine except my pregnancy has been diagnosed as ectopic.

We found out about a month ago that we were having a baby and it was meant to be our first. We were so excited. Then I had some pains and was referred to the EPAU, and they couldn't find any sign of pregnancy so I had a blood test and had to wait 48 hours to see if my HCG levels increased, they didn't so I knew that we weren't going to have a baby.

Unfortunately it took two further scans and two further blood tests to diagnose an ectopic pregnancy.

It's a horrible experience to go through, and I'm lucky to have a supportive husband. I don't think he can understand fully how I feel as I have physically endured this as well as emotionally.

I just want you to know you are not alone, please come and talk about it when you want to.

AlpacaYourThings Sun 13-Apr-14 12:24:39

With regards to trying again the NHS website offers guidance but it is worth talking to your Consultant/GP about when is best to try again.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 12:28:02

Thank you for your message and I'm sorry for your loss too. Do you both want to try again soon? It's hard to know when's the right time isn't it? I've still kept my scan picture from when they did the transvaginal scan and I saw the heartbeat! X

AlpacaYourThings Sun 13-Apr-14 12:41:15

My DH wants to try again. I'm still physically miscarrying so I personally can't even contemplate trying at the minute.

polkadotdelight Sun 13-Apr-14 13:04:32

We were advised to wait for one cycle before trying again. I didn't and had a chemical pregnancy straight after (probably co-incidence) but got pregnant straight afterwards. I'm almost 18 weeks now and it's been nerve wracking but myself and DH wanted to try again ASAP. Don't feel pressure to go into work and put a brave face on x

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 13:09:37

I'm sorry I didn't realise you were still going through it physically now. If you ever need to talk I will gladly listen and try to help.

Bek2107 Sun 13-Apr-14 13:11:28

I'm having my first monthly cycle now so hopefully we can start trying again soon. A few girls I work with are pregnant and even though I'm super happy for then it's so hard and I keep thinking " why can't it me me".

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